I believe that all women should be forced to carry unwanted pregnancies to term.
Jesus is my lord and savior.
Newt Gingrich would make a great president.
Sheriff Joe Arpaio is my hero.
I am not the creator. You have made two mistakes!
This.
This.
I’m sick of silly holidays like this and certainly won’t be celebrating National Deep Dish Pizza Day tomorrow.
I’m not lying right now!
I won’t be picking up a pizza from Giordano’s in honor of that inglorious day.
I have zero interest in the coming baseball season and absolutely will not find a way to watch Opening Day games tomorrow.
I have zero jealousy or animosity directed toward you for having access to Giordano’s. I think it’s fantastic that you reminded me of my inability to get that without paying astounding shipping fees! I feel incredibly grateful toward you at the moment!
I completely disagree with you! And upon my visit to Chicago next month I will studiously avoid eating any pizza of such design!
I wish I had to work Good Friday and Easter Monday! I think it sucks so very much that these days are public holidays, and I scorn the idea of a four day weekend. I’d much rather be here, at my desk, working.
I’m feeling very guilty about getting new glasses at specsavers. I really wish I’d gone to my usual optomertist and paid $500+ for the same service and product that just cost me $99.
He would have put glasses on the Kid too, instead of proving to her with handy lenses that the difference is minimal and she really doesn’t need them for a .5 whatchamicallit.
Just think of all that jolly teasing she’s missing out on from her school chums. All that bonding and comraderie. How will I cope?
I often lie about the truth, but always tell the truth about my lies. Honestly.
I’ve been King of the World since before the movie.
(All the rest of you, carry on.)