Tonight I cried...

Life has been tossing a few challenges at me lately. Along with the normal ‘my computer died and needs to be replaced’ and ‘my car needs more money poured into it’ stuff, I’ve been having romantic issues. My heart hurts because of it.

I have a daughter who is 23. Her mother and I divorced when she was three. I raised until she was 10 and then she went back and forth between her mother and I. She is the greatest person… and my very best friend. But now she lives half way across the country and we rarely communicate. My heart always hurts because I miss her so.

Tonight I thought I’d cheer myself up with some Brandy Carlile videos on YouTube. And then I found this one. It’s one of my favorite songs of hers. But the little girl reminded me so much of my own daughter at that age I just lost it and blubbered like a baby through the whole thing.

I know there are many, many more people who have it much worse than me so am not looking for sympathy. I just needed to share and right now I’m alone.

Thanks for listening.

I can’t help much with anything else, but I’m pretty good at forcing computers to work, when they don’t want to. Maybe I can help with that? :slight_smile:

Thanks for the offer but I must admit, and there is no way around this - I killed it. In the act of knocking it off of of the desk, I also spilled diet Coke in it (don’t ask. My very best Jerry Lewis I’m sure). Anyway, I’ve already replaced it.

We’re here. Can’t make everything better, but we can listen.

Can you call her?

When I was working on my recovery from an anxiety disorder, I had weeks where I would bawl my eyes out every morning, then go to work. Don’t underestimate the value of catharsis. :slight_smile:

Dude, you need a woman. Very, very much. Go and meet a woman. A life partner kind of woman. Someone you can cuddle with when you daughter is off having her own life.

Seriously, expand your horizons a little. A lot.

I do of course, frequently. That’s no insurance she will answer. I have her message down pat. We are not having troubles per se, the distance just makes me sad. I miss my friend.

Sunrazor, yeah I know. I tried that (see my OP). It not working out is part of my problem.

Sometimes, even seeing the destruction of a thousand dollars worth of electronic equipment can be kind of funny.

This seems like one of those times. I’m really sorry to admit that I’m chuckling at the thought of knocking a computer off a table and accidentally spilling diet coke inside. You’ve made my evening, if that makes you feel any better!

Unless you know otherwise, I’m going to guess that the OP is a woman. Not that I oppose her meeting a woman for a life partner. I wholly support the selection of women as life partners by people of all genders. But she (or he) might prefer a man as a life partner too.

And in the vein of actually helping… I don’t have much. Call a friend, go see a movie, go have coffee, go take a walk (NoCal is very nice this time of year), go get a puppy if you really need some long-term unconditional love. Best of luck!

“her mother and I divorced…” suggests otherwise.

Dude, if the OP’s wife divorced and they have a daughter and the OP is a woman, it needs a delicate touch. :slight_smile: Not saying there aren’t any of those relationships around, just that they’re relatively rare and that I’d diagnose a horse before a zebra.

Male guy checking in. Maybe it’s my male chauvinism showing but if I was a female would I have posted about crying?

Oh, and Mosier, happy to obliged.

I have those kind of days. It just seems like one thing on top of another and before I know it I am bawling. It is never just one thing but a combination of several things that can make me feel overwhelmed.

Usually a good cry helps to just get it all out. Then I can compose myself and start to seperate the issues so I can take them on one at a time.

Even though I am a woman I hate to cry. It is not so much a weakness thing as a privacy thing, if that makes any sense.

Sorry to hear you are feeling low. Sending supporting thoughts your way.

So I guess recommending Trace Adkin’s “You’re Gonna Miss This” probably wouldn’t help (unless you need another good cry, always good to let it out).

On the serious side: Dude, I understand. Just know that we are here for you.

If it makes you feel any better yesterday I cried over something I am not even sad about. My roommate told me she wants to move and I am fine with that, but the amount of work it will take to find another roommate or a different apartment kind of overwhelmed me for the afternoon so I sat in a hot bathtub and cried. We all need to have those moments every now and again.

Does your daughter call you back? If she’s too broke, buy her a calling card or something, or maybe set up a “phone date” once or twice a week or whatever, so you have that to look forward to.

And go rent Young Frankenstein. If that doesn’t get a laugh out of you, nothing will!

I stand corrected.

My advice: if you’re sad, after you’ve cried and/or wallowed a little, watch a comedy. My personal favorite is one of the Coupling episodes (sex is always funny). On a more long-term note, have you considered getting a pet? Pets are great if you’re lonely and willing to take on the responsibility. Dogs can be a great way to meet people, too…