I’m not married and have no kids. But every once in a while I try up to come up with creative names for potential future children. And sometimes I hear a word that would be a great first name for someone, except that it already defines something negative or nasty. Did you ever notice that? Here are some examples:
Anorexia (Female)- Sometimes it helps to put Jones at the end of it to hear how good the name would sound: “Anorexia Jones”
Tinia (Female)- This is the clinical term for ringworm.
Urethra (Female)- or “Uri” for short.
Syphilis (Female)- or “Sify” for short.
Pancreas (Male)
I’ll try to remember others that I’ve thought of. If you have any, please share.
I work for a large school system. During a name search, I found a student named, no lie, “Aquanetta”. When this name came up later, I was SHOCKED to find it was a different “Aquanetta”. That’s right, there is more than one!
I almost convinced my wife to name a son “Justin Case” and tried to convince her of “Alice Cooper” for a girl.
Always thought “Ruebella Placenta” rolled off the tongue.
I knew a guy named Asshole… Pronounced “Ashley”… Totally messed up…
Almost worse in some ways, there were two twins in my hometown whose names were pronounced “La-MON-zha-lo” and “a-RON-zha-lo”…
… Spelled “Lemonjello” and “Orangejello”
Me? I’m just gonna name my kid Angus McGyver.
He’ll be the son I take to movies and be a good father to… Then I’ll have a kid named Bobo+ (read “Bobo Plus”). Bobo+ will be the kid who gets blamed for everything.
I believe this is an urban legend. At least I’ve heard it attributed to several cities. Most frequently, it’s a doctor or nurse who has named the kids because the mother either doesn’t care or cannot be found.
We’ve had this argument before - in fact, I had to check the dates on the posts to make sure this was new. I also knew an Lemonjello and Orangejello. I knew them personally. I don’t know why the mother chose those names.
My sister always wanted to have twin girls and name one of them “Chastity” and the other “Slut.” Just to see what happened.
My aunt had a student in her class named “Virgin Mary.” I kid you not. Last name Mary, first name Virgin. I also know someone whose first name is “Lady Elizabeth.” Odd, huh? Of course, that one has nothing to do with this.
Cranky, glad you liked it! It actually didn’t go over that well 'till at some point near the end I said “Thank you for coming out. Until I see you agian, I’m Holden MacRoyne.” Or something like that. Then the place just erupted.
Also, when I was a teacher (previous life), there was a student in the school (not in my class) named Michael Hunt. Yes, he went by the moniker “Mike”. The secretary always was very careful when she had to call his name over the loud speaker. He had a brother, but his name was something boring like Jim.
Not to “Hello John” this thread (I’m formal), but I tend to think that true names that just don’t work are a bit funnier than fake ones - Holden MacRoyne notwithstanding.
