This is going to sound rather morbid, but I wonder how often people at the end of their lives think, “I wish I had died a long time ago. Things have been pretty miserable the last 30 years or so, but I kept sticking around hoping it would get better.”
Probably because regrets and wishes are different things.
I think theres some disconnect in some of the responses here with what I am sure is true: people find themselves regretting things at the end because they lived as though they would never die.
Of course we are all intellectually aware of the fact that we are going to die, but I think most of us are not emotionally connected to it. While in some ways that’s a good thing, a psychological buffer that protects us from sinking into morbid fear and hopelessness over our mortality, it also lets us make stupid choices that we would never make if we were making them with the knowledge of our exact day and hour of death. Because it isn’t known, we can, and absolutely do bullshit ourselves about it.
This is demonstrated all the time by people who face their deaths and get a reprieve; I have never heard of anyone who went through it and was not meaningfully changed in important ways, ways that are directly targeted at making sure they don’t end up regretting anything. No matter how much they thought they were doing their lives the way they meant to, coming within a hair of losing that life always seems to shine a light, flip a switch, sound an alarm that wakes the person from the buffered complacency they were living in and didn’t see until they believed they were going to die.
There was a great line in Six Feet Under…a griefstricken client was sobbing on Nate’s shoulder, and asked him why we die. His answer was perfect: to give life meaning.
Think about it… nothing would really matter if we had eternity for do-overs.
Six Feet Under was one of the best shows I’ve seen. It was thoughtful, insightful and full of love. This nonsense is insulting drivel by a nasty bitch. Who the hell wants to be treated by a nurse with no compassion?
Garden as though you’ll live forever.
Live as though you could die any minute.
- Zorba the Gardener
Could you walk me through the steps you took to arrive at these conclusions?
You grossly underestimate humans.
I don’t follow…?
Outside of these 5, my biggest regret in life was not getting out of my hometown after high school. I was stuck here for 40 years because of my parents. My hometown is essentially a backwoods stuck 50 years in the past. I can’t imagine what I would be doing now if I had the right opportunities.
#6. I wish I had the courage to tell other people to go screw yourselves and do what I knew was right.
Just in case I’m not reading your reply wrong, I don’t think she’s suggesting FaceTime as in being together, but FaceTime which is like Skype, so you can be a part of his life from far away.