Unless it was an allergic reaction to one or more of the food components, I don’t see how one can get blisters from eating spicy food. There’s no heat, per se, and the sensation doesn’t come from caustic chemicals. It comes from capsaicin replacing your normal neurotransmitters for a time and forcing your nerves to fire continuously until they are “exhausted” (thus the numb feeling after you no longer feel the heat of the pepper.)
OK, so I went to lunch with the “conceptualist” and expressed the tabasco quandry.
He then presented me with a list he’s been “mulling over” of things he’d like to see me bathe in.
Week 1: Rice Pudding
Week 2: Tobasco sauce.
Week 3: A-1 Steak Sauce
Week 4: Tomato soup
Week 5: Spicy Brown Mustard
Week 6: Relish
Week 7: Marshmellow Fluff
Week 8: Finely minced ground beef
Week 9: Pickle juice, with big 'ol Dill pickles floating around
Week 10: Mayonnaise
Week 11: Thawed Frozen Orange Juice Concentrate
Week 12: Mashed up bananas
Week 13: (The big finish) A human size bowl of Fruit Loops
At this point I’m wondering if these conceptual films/photos will just be for HIS use
Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?
Why, yes. I’m bathing in it.
Would someone please explain the concept or message one would be asked to derive from seeing our lovely jarbabyj in a human sized bowl of Fruit Loops. I must be a little dense.
You can check out a picture of Roger Daltry bathing in a tub full of Heinz Pork and Beans on the cover of The Who Sell Out.
And with all this attention being paid to jarbabe’s hoo-ha, let’s not forget about her ta-tas, I’m not sure they’ll like tabasco any more than her hoo-ha. And of course her (can’t think of the techincal term, ya-ya? hee-ha?) heiney might not be to thrilled either. One reverse fart and we’ll be looking at another Wolf-Ass thread.
I personally would like to see a bath-tub full of warm chocolate pudding, but hey, that’s my thing.
(Or maybe my thing is talking about jarbaby’s naughty bits? Either way.)
I wouldn’t be as worried over possible hoo ha hickeys as I would be for the health of your pee pee. The hoo ha has friends looking out for her and she’s rather well protected. With extra caution you might keep her out of harm’s way. The pee pee, on the other hand, is sensitive, alone and defenseless. The first time I had a bladder infection I thought I was dying. All I can think is: catheter time.
As a possible tobasco double: very mild taco sauce. The same south of the border appeal without the nasty bite.
Might a make some suggestions?
Peanut butter.
Pumpkin pie filling.
Gazpacho. Complete with Sour Cream.
How about incorporating these into a 12 month calendar? Give the Anne Geddes calendars a run for their money this Christmas.
Actually, weeks 2, 3, 5, 6, 9, and 11 all have the potential to make your a hoo-ha very unhappy camper (or bather). Not to mention other parts of your body. If you have any cuts or boo-boos, those will hurt too when you bathe in these substances.
I would look for a Tabasco substitute, and when you bathe in the other things, I’d slather any “sensitive parts” with a generous helping of Vaseline. I’ve heard it will do the trick for you. But again, I’d do a trial run, and I still wouldn’t trust it against Tabasco (the fumes from which would probably burn your eyes).
Geez… not one response. Either no one wants to bite, or no one remembers the old joke about the lady who wanted a milk bath.
“Do you want hat pasteurized?”
“No, past my boobs will be fine.”
(Changed to “Past my knees ill be fine” in kid’s joke books.)
y’know, you might be able to get away with a tabasco bath without damage if you slather you sensitive bits with, say, vaseline or something. For my money, though, the best solution would be to whip up a tabasco substitute that would look like Th Real Thing, because th biggest pain might be to your wallet see aboe posts on costs), even if you get industrial-strength containers of the sauce at Sam’s Club.
Couldn’t you “bathe in” something without submersing yourself in it? Perhaps a shot of you doing a lather-rinse-repeat with a bottle of Tobasco? Little rivulets of it running down your body…curving along…mmmmmmm.
What was I talking about? Oh, yeah, Jess bathing…mmmmm…
Well, I’ve made the mistake of touching the penis after eating hot food (most memorable experience was after eating Atomic wings at Quaker Steak N’ Lube) and I can assure you that it is a VERY painful experience. Not to mention any open wounds…shudder
Still, I imagine you could get away with using Red Hot sauce instead of Tabasco (they are not the same…Tabasco has a much richer, zestier taste…and is quite a bit more expensive to boot!)