TV/movie task force number 6749: all-estrogen edition

Once again the Earth is in peril, and you have been charged with assembling a team of TV & movie characters to save us from the forces of darkness. For various contrived reasons I’m too lazy to make up, you have 12 jobs to fill:

[ol]
[li]Field leader[/li][li]Expert interrogator[/li][li]Superpowered muscle[/li][li]Assassin[/li][li]Medic[/li][li]Science expert[/li][li]Pilot[/li][li]Intelligence/seductress[/li][li]Occult/magic expert[/li][li]Hacker[/li][li]Law-enforcement liasion[/li][li]Detective[/li][/ol]

but only 7 slots on the team; in other words, a few characters will have to do double or triiple duty.

You may recruit characters from any TV or movie, with the stipulation that only one per fictional universe is allowed. That is, if you choose Willow Rosenberg for your witch, you disqualify not only Buffy & Faith for the super-powered muscle, but Fred Burkle for science as well, because Buffy and Angel unquestionably share a continuity. (We are ignoring St. Elsewhere for this purpose.

Oh, and only girls allowed. Pallas Athena is enabling the dimension-hopping, and she is sick of men this millennium for reasons best not inquired into.

Thoughts?

Miss Marple for Interrogator, Law Liaison, and Detective. Intelligence too, but not seductress!

Skald, mate, I hope any team I can, strike that, want to think of, does not have to rely on my leadership because I’d be in a constantly densifying daze of hormonal blizz ordering nothing but pillow fights in baby dolls and … oh well, Lord Dark Helmet could conquer earth on my watch.

Is that what you want?

Tamara gets Medic and Intelligence. (Future History)(Multiverse)(I’ll not cheat and count the multiverses seperately)

Col. Wilma Deering gets the pilot slot, and doubles as Field Leader. (Buck Rogers)

Supergirl (Silver Age) is the muscle, and can double as LE liason. (DC)

Detective and assassin might just be a PMSing Emma Peel. (Avengers)

Willow gets the magic position. (Buffy)

Assassin: Ziva David (NCIS)

To be clear, are books allowed, or not? You say “TV/movie”, but so far as I know, there’s never been a TV show or movie featuring Pallas (at least, not the one I presume you’re referring to).

You seem to be implying that Athena is not real. I’m going to give you a moment to consider whom you’re talking to. I mean, that’s just barely south of saying that Thor isn’t real. :mad:

My thought was to restrict the field to movie & tv characters, but I fully expect to be ignored by people who want to bring books & comics into it. Though, frankly, it’s hard to imagine situations in which you’d want the Silver as well as Emma Peel.

I was going to criticize that choice on the ground of Ziva’s poor impulse control. But then it occurred to me that she mostly shows that failing when Tony is in danger, so I won’t.

I’d rather give that slot to Fiona from Burn Notice, though, so I can use Abby for my science geek.

Starbuck (rebooted BSG). Just Starbuck.

I’m not sure how I edited out “-Age Supergirl” from “the Silver” above.

Skald, you’re losing it. Why limit the pulchritude when I don’t have to? I like Emma. I like Kara. By the rules stipulated, I can have both.

If it’s a problem that requires a freaking Silver-Age Kryptonian to actually exert herself, Emma will either just get in the way or be killed in short order.

If it’s a problem that Emma and her ilk could handle WITHOUT the blond goddess from Argo City, then said goddess will handle it before lunch, and the team will be swiftly disbanded. There won’t even be a lingerie-pillow fight.

You’re no fun! :mad:

MY plan raises the odds of pillow-fights and tasteful shower scenes; yours does not. How I am, then, less fun?

Assuming my good friend **Skald **won’t mind me adding books to the allowable sources from which to select my team, I present Oak’s Angels:

  1. Team Lead/Hacker/Other–Commander Susan Ivanova, B5
  2. Pilot/Interrogations–Lt. (I think, can’t remember her rank) Starbuck
  3. Muscle/Legal–She Hulk, Esq.
  4. Seduction/Intel/Detective–Pat Savage (Doc’s Sister)
  5. Mage–The Simbul, aka The Witch-Queen of Aglarond and consort of Elminster
  6. Doctor/Science–Beverly Crusher, M.D., ST:TNG
  7. Assassin/Other–Xena, Warrior Princess

First draft; some of them can easily multitask, most of them are totally pillow-worthy and could kill me too if they heard me talk like that:
[ol]
[li]Field leader: Susan Ivanova, Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver), Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton or Lena Headey)[/li][li]Expert interrogator: [/li][li]Superpowered muscle: Cameron or River (Summer Glau in any case), Leeloo (Milla Jovovich), Xev Bellringer (Xenia Seeberg)[/li][li]Assassin: Pris (Darryl Hannah), Nikita (Peta Wilson), Max Guevera (Jessica Alba)[/li][li]Medic: Dr. Janet Fraiser (Teryl Rothery)[/li][li]Science expert: Jadzia Dax (Terry Farrell), Samantha Carter (Amanda Tapping)[/li][li]Pilot: Carmen Ibanez (Denise Richards), Wilma Deering (Erin Gray), Shane Vansen (Kristen Cloke), Sharon Valeri (Grace Park)[/li][li]Intelligence/seductress: Saffron (Christina Hendricks), Number Six (Tricia Helfer), Barbarella (Jane Fonda)[/li][li]Occult/magic expert: Jennifer (Veronica Lake)[/li][li]Hacker: Mystique (Rebecca Romijn)[/li][li]Law-enforcement liasion[/li]Detective: Veronica Mars (Kristen Bell).[/ol]

I don’t know 5, so I won’t contest it; I’m sure she’s less evil than Willow, or you’d have chosen the latter.

I think you’d be better off with Xena as team leader. Susan’s much better at following orders than the Warrior Princess, and Xena’s probably more versatile. Besides, I wouldn’t want tobe the one who had to tell her she WASN’T in charge.

You don’t want Dr. Crusher on any team - she’s not bad at medicine, but she can’t take orders and she’s far too emotional.

Seven of Nine for superpowered muscle, science expert, detective, and hacker.

Deanna Troi for Expert interrogator - use that empathy for something useful.

Saffron from “Firefly” for Intelligence/Seductress (assuming there is some compelling reason for her to remain loyal for the length of the operation).

Zoe from “Firefly” for field leader.

River from “Firefly” for assassin.

I’m thinking/hoping those two will be able to [del]cum[/del] come to a resolution of the issue. If not, The Simbul will polymorph Xena into a hamster or something until she’s needed.

Disqualified based on the OP. One per Universe.

Although I totally agree about Beverly Crusher.

You can’t have both Seven & Deanna; same universe. Likewise you have to choose one of Saffron, Zoe, & River. And to me the answer is obviously Zoe. Saffron is going to betray you, while River, even post Serenity, is still a wounded, crazy little kid.