I live in rural North Carolina, in a location where I have nosey Bible thumping neighbors a quarter mile away.
To get to the point, I’d like to have a little fun at their expense. Does anyone have suggestions for stuff to put in the laundry for the clothesline exhibit? It has be inexpensive, but good enough to gve them a WTF? or a :eek:
A Bad Religion T-shirt? (The black one with the white circle on the front that contains a black cross and a red ‘no’ circle-and-slash.)
Wait… Here’s one.
Gigantic crotchless panties.
Want me to come over with a dozen pagans and dance nekkid in your backyard? We can bring our own drums and firespinning equipment. You supply the mead and beer, I’ll supply the shock factor.
I’ve always liked this t-shirt.
I presume you sometimes make it to the city and can visit a resale store?
Sleazy garter belts, corsets and baby-doll pajamas
A sheet with a pentagram spray painted on it
Clown suits
Hip waders
I imagine a replica of the Shroud of Turin might turn some heads, if they don’t just think it’s a dirty sheet. Maybe you could cause the form of Jesus to appear on something? Oooh, or you could dress up as Judas Iscariot and make out with a guy that looked like Jesus! Or your wife in a beard and sandals, whatever.
I would go for the dirty sheet thing, somebody will say “Oh Lawd, I seen the image of the Savior on the clothesline!” You know, like the images of the Virgin Mary on a dirty window or on a grapefruit, or whatever.
Then you would have people lined up for miles to see the latest “Miracle Incarnation”
Of course you could charge five bucks to look and ten to touch…Then the morning shows, Oprah, money and fame.
Hell, go for it, yank their chains and profit at the same time!
A nuns outfit, next to a hooker outfit.
Garments made from more than one type of cloth.
Wicked!
A full-body latex suit. And no, I’m not going to link to one.
Two dozen glow-in-the-dark banana warmers.
Durned hamsters ate my reply, so I’ll try again.
For a chance to run around my property with a bunch of others butt nekkid while drinking beer, I just might convert from Lutheranism… 
So far, I like the idea of the clown suit, naughty lingerie, and I might add a couple pairs of really garish boxer shorts. All the better to hang it all in the same load. I don’t think the t-shirts or dirty sheets would work, because you couldn’t see them from across the field without optics. They’re not that wierd, after all.
I’ve also considered hanging out the ‘witch hitting the utility pole’ gag come Halloween. I haven’t figured out if they’d approve or be appalled; it depends on the manner of their Bible thumping…
Inflatable sheep?
From my experience, not going to church is reason enough to get them riled. I have found living your life however you live it, which, by definition, isn’t going to be how they THINK you should live it works great.
Darwin Fish are pretty handy little creatures, their population is booming. On your mailbox perhaps.
If you are in a small enough community, any unusual mail will probably make itself known, especially if the address is accidentally wrong. You don’t even have to go the “little brown wrapper” route, just things like This .
I know of a family that hated their neighbors and took a 4x8 sheet of plywood and advertised their house for sale to minorities, the poor, those with lots of cars, etc. I saw it with my own eyes.
Klaatu has a great idea. Is there a t-shirt maker near you who could print a ‘turin shroud’ picture onto a bedsheet for you?
Bonus points if you can manage to come out the backdoor enraged and with a shotgun while they are examining it and shout, “Hey!!! Whatchu doin’ to my laundry!?”
Well, we haven’t copyrighted it or anything!
I’m not out to overtly piss them off. More like take the short track to firmly establishing myself as the local eccentric. I’m actually a churchgoer, and they know it.
They also know that my ideal is that a neighbor should be just nosey enough to know when something is wrong across the way. They’re a little more than that, and that’s why I want to have a bit of fun at their expense.
Oh, and my idea for a long time has been to buy 1 each of the various Jesus and Darwin fish, and arrange them to tell a story on my car starting from the simplest of each to the most outrageous. I’ve never taken the time to go shopping for the fish, however.
How about some Flying Spagetti Monster goodness?