Twilight finale split into two movies

Why make one Twilight film when you can charge moviegoers to see two of them?

Any non-rhetorical questions you’re looking to have answered here in GQ?

Perfect for Cafe Society. Moved from GQ.

samclem Moderator, GQ

Same reason the most desperately-in-need-of-an-editor Harry Potter book is being turned into two movies.

What’s really sad is that the fourth book is simultaneously the worst by far and also the one in which the least actually happens.

I might actually go see this just to see how they handle all of the supremely crazy shit that happens in this book. How’re they gonna put a C-section performed by a vampire teeth in a movie aimed at pre-teen girls?

Romantically, I assume.


I’ve never read the Twilight books but this scares me.

That’s exactly what I want to know. I’ve never read the book, but that scene skeeves me out from a distance of 500 feet. How could you possibly show that and not have it rated R+++++?

Great two movies that I won’t see. It will sure let me catch upon my reading.

I recommend the fourth book just because you just can’t understand how crazy it is until you read it yourself.

I read the first book (in one sitting at the library, didn’t even check it out) because I was curious about the whole Twilight craze. Also, I do enjoy YA fantasy, even though I’m an adult and don’t really have a great excuse. Whatever. I found it poorly written and VERY repetitive (if you removed 90% of the references to how beautiful Edward is, you’d probably lose about a quarter of the book), but at the same time, it’s not hard to understand why preteen girls would love it.

When I put it back on the shelf, I saw the fourth book sitting there. I was mildly curious to see what happens, although not enough to read the intervening books. I didn’t really read it so much as skim it in about half an hour, but it was enough to discern that it is absolutely BATSHIT CRAZY. It reads like bad fanfiction. All kinds of insane things happen that make you wonder how an editor didn’t call for an intervention on poor Stephenie.

So I’m just curious as to how they’re going to put all of it into a movie without being completely distasteful. Besides the vampire teeth C-section, the heroine is transformed into a vampire and cuts herself off completely from her dad, letting him think she’s dead. There’s a sex scene that leaves the protagonist badly bruised. Oh, and the baby that is the result of the vampire C-section is immediately “imprinted” with the protagonist’s ex-boyfriend/sort of boyfriend. Meaning that he is her mate. She’s a baby! It is so fucking creepy and weird.

Well, whaddya expect? He’s not of The Body.

Really? Because it’s the only one that I could actually stand to read a part of. It was really weird how oddly engaging it was. My thing was that I opened it in the middle, read only a few sections, and it actually made sense, making me think the rest of the books must have been pointless telling instead of showing.