The world may never know, as my sepulchrous serpent of serendipidy has gobbled your Coked-up Hamster!
But sir, your sepulchrous serpent of serendipidy has stupidly slithered into my super-sized sexual sheath and thus subsequently shifted into serpent sausage.
With a mighty “Ha-Do-Ken!”, I remove your super-sized sexual sheath from the Realms of Relevance with a judiciously applied Catholic-School Education!
My German Grunge Band ought to set that Catholic School Education in its place…
How can your German Grunge Band hope to prevail against the spine-crushing onslaught of David Hasselhoff?
Ha ha ha! Your David Hasselhoff* is no match for my David Soul!
On 45, no less!
AAUUGH!! David Soul!
<cringes in horror>
But even the fearsome menace posed by David Soul is nothing compared to my Great Chicago Fire of 1871!!
Nuts to your Great Chicago Fire of 1871! That can’t stand up to my vintage aluminum cans with the pop tops you can make chains out of!!
Your vintage aluminum cans with pop tops you can make chains out of are sucked in to the vortex of my Crochet Toilet Paper Hat of Doom!
Pah!! I laugh at your Crochet Toiled Paper Hat of Doom as it is reduced to shreds by my Adorable Cuddly Kitten with the Big Eyes of Preciousity!!
Your ** Adorable Cuddly Kitten with the Big Eyes of Preciousity** is sent neutering by the Monstrous Whirling Veterinoid Castramatic Neutrotron!
And I send your Monstrous Whirling Veterinoid Castramatic Neutroton to its shrieking, flaming death with my Gen-U-Wine, They Really DO Exist, Dogs Playing Poker Tapestry!
Though some say scissors cut paper, I say your Gen-U-Wine, They Really DO Exist, Dogs Playing Poker Tapestry! will be instantly shredded by my Rabid Racoon on a Bad Crystal Meth Trip
Zounds! A Rabid Raccoon! Cranked up no less!!
Perhaps a new approach in in order! I see your Cranked-up 'Coon and raise you a Albino Ocelot on Ecstasy!!
A piano falls on the head of the *Albino Ocelot on Ecstasy, after my Black Cat with Borderline Personality Disorder crosses it’s path!
Humph, What does one use to deal with a Black Cat with Borderline Personality Disorder?
I know! A Pugnacious Porcupine Providing Pilfered Perscriptions for Prozac!!
Fascinating. Scissor is defeated by larger scissor, which is in turn defeated by even larger scissor. But remember, properly placed even a tiny pebble may destroy the mightiest of shears:
Suburban Sprawl
Now just a cotton-pickin’ minute here!
According to Eric Cartman of South Park, Rochambo involves two contestants taking turns kicking each other in the nuts as hard as they can, until one of the contestants gives up. There was no paper or scissors involved, and the “rocks” were only rocks in a euphemistic sense.
I call shenanigans!
Powering up to Supersaiya-jin level4, your kitten is blast away by a ** supersaiyan shit demon **
I mean, your ** SHENANIGANS ** is blasted away…sorry bout that…