Since I got engaged over the holidays :), I’ve started thinking about wedding plans. My sweety and I have been together for 10 years, and living together for most of that time, so we’re not really looking for a big wedding. We’d just have family and a few friends, and maybe a party afterwards.
Sweety’s brother got married at one of those little wedding chapels in Gatlinburg, TN. That was fine, but you really have to get in and out, and, while everything is pretty much handled for you, it’s all done in a cookie-cutter fashion and it felt a little rushed.
I’d like to have something a little more personal and a little quirky, maybe (like us!) For instance, I’m going to hand-knit a lace shawl to wear (I found the yarn today – woo hoo!!! 50% wool/50% silk lace weight and absolutely gorgeous.)
I know Dopers have great ideas – share yours with me! Think inexpensive and fun. But no LOTR or other such themes. I do draw the line there.
Congratulations! You may find it helpful to repeat this often during the planning process: Sit down. Drink a beer. Tell each other: “Our wedding will be lovely, but it will not be perfect. Something will go wrong. That’s okay, because, by God, we are getting married and that’s what matters.”
You can get great dresses fairly cheaply if you’re willing to forgo the big and foofy route. My dress cost $120. It was ankle-length white silk, very pretty, but not a traditional wedding dress.
The best wedding I’ve ever been to (besides my own) was a Quaker wedding. There was no officiant; the couple made their vows to each other; and then any of the guests could stand and share whatever advice, memories, blessings they had for the couple. It was beautiful, and there wasn’t a dry eye in the place. (This may work best if you don’t have too many crazy relatives prone to lengthy discourses.)
At our wedding, we incorporated another Quaker tradition. Instead of having a guest book, we had all the guests sign a marriage certificate, “in celebration of the bonds of friendship, love, and marriage,” promising to support us and our marriage. A friend did the certificate in beautiful calligraphy for us, and it’s now hanging in our living room. In some Quaker homes, it’s a tradition to display the marriage certificate by the door, so that if either partner is considering leaving, they’ll see it on their way out and be reminded of their vows.
I want my wife’s wedding dress to have wings. Either fairy wings or angel wings, thats her choice. But it has to have wings.
My buddy got married right on the beach. It was awesome. The weather was perfect. Another friend was married on a horse ranch. Very pretty one with green rolling hills n stuff. Nice. Again, the weather was great!! That’s a risk though… have a back up plan if you do it outside.
I’ve been to several weddings, and my favorite was a friend-of-a-friend’s affair held in the bride’s back yard. Just some chairs, a table of food, and a minister. The bride wore a beautiful green silk dress that displayed the tattoo on her lower back. She and her groom said their vows, kissed, and then we partied down.
One idea is to not marry in white/ivory. Pick another color and have the veil match!
If I had had my way, I would have married in a blue velvet dress. I ended up having to get married in a brown skirt/blouse outfit I’d gotten at Lane Bryant. Still, though, I know only one other woman that got married in a nontraditional color.
Another idea, since this is going to be a small wedding, is to have the ceremony at a weird hour of the day. Do your friends love you enough to come to a sunrise wedding? How about a midnight one, in which those attending the wedding hold candles and the whole thing is done by candlelight only? Very romantic! You could also have the wedding on a weird day (I married on a Wednesday). Maybe marry on whatever day of the week you two first met or something?
Ever played with Christmas lights and put them on your head? Figure out a way to make a headpiece and incorporate tiny white Christmas lights into it … not too many, but if done right it’d be gorgeous. Wear that instead of a veil.
Have an international wedding of sorts. Look up wedding traditions of other countries and pick the ones that sound cool and have meaning for you and the groom.
Since you’re not doing a big wedding, may I suggest a vacation wedding then? Is there a place you and the groom went to and loved? A place you’ve always wanted to go? Have the wedding there. Potential places: an island, a beach, New Orleans, Washington DC, Italy (or your homeland, wherever it may be), etc. I have a friend who had a very small wedding in New Orleans. Best wedding I’ve ever been to. The whole weekend was awesome!
A couple was married at the Wharf-to-Wharf race in Santa Cruz.
Up on a flatbed truck in their wedding attire/running gear in front of 14,000 runners,then ran the race together.
One of my uni pals recently married and his bride walked down the aisle to the theme from the Muppet Show…they didn’t tell anyone but the wedding party this would be the song.
Burundi, I like the Quaker ideas, especially the part about having friends & family say stuff. Only problem is my side of the family tends to be pretty shy. I’d probably have trouble getting anybody to actually SAY anything.
For logistical reasons I’d kinda rather stay close to home and family for the ceremony. (I’m not good at delegating control of things.)
And I’m all for interesting music, though the Imperial March from Star Wars might be a little much. But definitely not the Same Old Music for this gal.
When I got married we had lived together for years. We had a civil ceremony at a court house with family and witnesses(very close friends) and no-one else. If it was today I would have someone videotape it to show at the reception.
For the reception we booked out an entire restaurant. We asked people not to buy gifts (we owned what we needed) but pay for their own meal. Because of this we didn’t have to worry about invitations or guestlists. We treated it like a party and just let word of mouth do the trick. People were welcome to bring anyone they liked - partners, kids, relatives. We encouraged people to invite people we may have forgotten. It was very cool - lots of old forgotten friends and stuff. We probably had 250 people there and it didn’t cost us a penny.
Mr Goo and I got married by a celebrant on a local hillside, overlooking the ocean and coastline that we both love. Immediate family (parents, siblings and certain grandparents only). Then off to a lovely beach restaurant, where we all had a gorgeous lunch. No “giving away”, no cake, no wedding dress, no bridal party, no worries about the ‘correct’ way of doing anything, etc. Just a quick and quiet exchange of heartfelt vows, a glass of champagne while admiring the scenery and off for a feed (our shout) with loved ones.
We asked for no gifts, too, as we’d been living together for long enough that we had all we needed. Everyone ignored that request, and we got some lovely and thoughtful stuff.
To continue my contribution (or lack thereof), if I were ever to get married, I’d want a Justice of the Peace to do it with as little ceremony as possible. Then a big party of some kind, maybe costume. With a live band that I could jump into and make an ass out of myself with.
I don’t know where “inexpensive” falls for you, but I know the Fabulous Fox does rentals (and I don’t know the rates offthetoppamyhead) and I never fail to be impressed when we go to a show there.
I don’t know if it’s feasible, or if ya wanna go outdoors, but there are a couple nice spots on the Chattahootchee in the various recreation areas that’d probably be great for something informal.
The park at Stone Mountain has some stuff that might be fun. A riverboat or an antebellum mansion, etc. Here’s the site
If you wanted to spend a lil bit (out of my price range, but my price range is “Playground at McDonald’s”), I know the Fabulous Fox rents various rooms/ballrooms. And I, personally, lurve the Fox.
The islands out at Lake Lanier make it sound like they have all kindsa stuff, though I don’t know price ranges. Link!
If you want to do a smell wedding and travel a bit, how about Rock City? Nothing says class like Rock City! They also own a facility called Grandview that does wedding stuff. If you want a bit classier than Rock City, though I can’t imagine what that would be.
Zephyr? Great stuff…very easy to work with. It’ll be lovely!
I went to one wedding earlier this year where the family had a tradition of dedicating the bouquet to someone special to the couple (for them it was one of the groomsmen who was in the armed forces, had been shipped out, and couldn’t be at the wedding.) It eliminated the bouquet/garter toss (yay!) and was a really nice moment.
They also own a facility called Grandview that does wedding stuff. If you want a bit classier than Rock City, though I can’t imagine what that would be.