Updated Song Lyrics for Aging Artists.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

**Alice Cooper **– No More Mr. Young Guy
[sup]*Sung to the tune of “No More Mr. Nice Guy.”

(Guitar Intro)*[/sup]

I used to bang all the sweet young things,
Now they – all run and flee.
I’m forced to look - for little old ladies,
Hope they remember me.

Now I like just like to read the paper,
And not be seen.
With me, - it’s all ‘bout getting golf time,
And my - Ovaltine[sup]TM.[/sup]

No more mister young guy,
No more music scene,
No more mister young guy,
They say he’s old, he’s unclean.

Another wrinkle on my face today.
I can’t trust my eyes.
I’ve been thrown out of the music circles,
But can’t remember why.

I went to search - incognito,
For rubbing alcohol.
My pharmacist – he recognized me,
And gave me Geritol[sup]TM.[/sup]

He said,
No more mister young guy,
No more music scene,
No more mister young guy,
They say he’s old, he’s unclean.

.

2

Bra-vo!

All I have to add is the obvious:

[roger daltry]
Didn’t die before I got old…
[/roger daltry]

3

My take on the Who song is “Hope I die before my kids get old.”

4

How About…

The Who – Horseshoe Wizard

Now that I’m not a young boy,
I play the metal shoe.
From sandpits in the backyard,
With not much more to do.
But I ain’t seen nothin’ like him
At any barbecue.
That deaf, old and blind guy
Sure throws a mean horseshoe.

Standing like a statue,
Becomes part of his routine.
Testing for the wind gusts,
Always playing clean.
He plays by intuition.
Don’t let him hustle you.
That deaf, old and blind guy
Sure throws a mean horseshoe.

He’s a horseshoe wizard,
He tosses with a twist.
A horseshoe wizard
Got such a supple wrist!

How do you think he does it? (I don’t know!)
What makes him so good?

Well, he ain’t got no distractions,
Can’t hear opponents’ yells.
Can’t see the iron target,
He plays by sense of smell.
Always has a ringer,
Never shoots askew,
That deaf, old and blind guy
Sure throws a mean horseshoe

He can beat me now,
I used to be the champ.
I know I’d have won it
If it wasn’t for the cramp.

He can beat my favorite sand pit,
He can beat the best.
His disciples face him forward,
And he just does the rest.
He throws while flipping fingers,
And other gestures too.
That deaf, old and blind guy
Sure throws a mean horseshoe.

He’s a horseshoe wizard,
He tosses with a twist.
A horseshoe wizard
Got such a supple wrist!
He’s a horseshoe wizard
His score shoots even more!
A horseshoe wizard,
The world’s new horseshoe lord!
He’s scoring more!
He’s scoring more!
I thought I was the reigning ringer king,
But I just handed my horseshoe crown to him.
To him! To him!

.

5

Sometimes the artists do it for you. Stones’ “Spider and the Fly” original version:

She was common, flirty, she looked about thirty . . .

On Stripped, 1996

she was spiffy, shifty, she looked about fifty . . .

6

The Rolling Stones - Start My Heart

Can ya start my heart?,
Can ya start my heart, I think it stopped.
Can ya start my heart?
Can ya start my heart, I think it stopped.

I think my ticker’s shot.
I should have stuck to pot.
My veins are clogged, I’m turning green.
Paddle zap me with that mean, mean machine…

.

7

AAAARRRGGGGHHH!!! :eek:

Alice is still @$&*%! hot, I’ll have you know! :mad:

Humph!

Now go over to SickthinksUK and post that. Go on, I dare ya! Register, go to Fun and Games, find the “Sickthings Sing” thread and put 'er up. It’ll fit right in. Just watch out for Madame. :smiley: