Useless consumer products

Diaper Genie-

You buy the unit, you buy the plastic bag inserts, you open the lid and insert soiled diaper and close then turn the lid three rotations. When full you empty a string of wrapped diaper bundles. Buy more plastic inserts.
OR

Save the insane amount of plastic bags every shop gives you, keep them flattened on a clip next to the changing table. Pull bag off, shake open and toss diaper in and then tie in a knot and toss in trash. Your hand comes in no more contact with the diaper than with DG, plus it is free.

:confused:Unless you have trouble with knotting a plastic bag due to some disability why use a diaper genie? In fact cranking the thing for three rotations seems harder.,

There have been many products that try to fix a problem that doesn’t exist. Back in the nineties, some company tried selling canned fruit juice concentrate that was shelf stable, so people wouldn’t have to wait for the frozen kind to thaw any more.

I never heard of anyone waiting for frozen OJ concentrate to thaw- run the tap over the unopened can, open it, plop out the OJ, add water and stir. Instant cold OJ!

The new stuff went off the market in six months.

There’s a whole site dedicated to this topic: http://theworstthingsforsale.com/

Most of the bags I get from the grocery store have at least one hole, so they’re no good for air-tight encapsulation of baby poo bombs. I don’t have a baby, but I was just wondering how long the wrapped diapers will fester away in the Genie. :eek:

I was amused to see frozen monkey bread at the grocery store. Perfect for people who can’t figure how to peel open a tube of fridge biscuits and dip them in melted butter, I guess.

I loved my Diaper Genie with my first. Saved me from stinking poo bombs at 2 am when I didn’t want to walk a trash bag outside to the garbage can.

I didn’t need it with my second, however, as I had her older brother to take out the stinking poo bombs. :smiley:

My vote is for the SlapChop and similar devices which just simply don’t chop. The blades aren’t sharp enough, period, full stop. Trying to use one is just an exercise in frustration, followed by 5 minutes of washing a gazillion pieces of plastic, rather than my one knife and a cutting board.

ETA: gotpasswords, they’ll hold almost a weeks’ worth for a newborn, but those aren’t particularly stinky anyhow. When they get bigger (and thus their diapers get bigger) you’ve got to empty it every 3 days or so. Eventually, it’s just too hard to cram the diaper in the tiny hole on top and you sell the thing at a garage sale to a pregnant person.

I have a food processor, but I haven’t used it in years. When I was cooking for a crowd, yeah, it was handy to chop three or four onions and bell peppers and mushrooms and such. But when cooking for two or three, it’s quicker for me to just use the knife and cutting board. I don’t have to assemble and disassemble the knife and cutting board.

Frozen concentrate has one big drawback, it has to be kept frozen. I’d rather have FJ concentrate on a pantry shelf rather than taking valuable freezer space away from Fla-Vor-Ices and french fries. It is also legitimately annoying to be poking at the bottom of the pitcher trying to break up the block of frozen crap. If you just pour in water and stir, you get orange tinted water and a block of orange concentrate.

Of course, the fact that the product failed means that they didn’t actually make a better product. My bet, it tasted like ass. Shelf stable juices don’t taste as good as refrigerated, and concentrates don’t taste as good as fresh, add the two together… bleh.

You are the very first person I’ve ever heard complain about the difficulty of stirring up FOJC.

Oh- FOJC is frozen crap, but Flavor-Ices aren’t? Wow.

I was given a ‘quesadlla maker’ for Christmas a few years ago…basically a waffle iron, with ridges that divided it into quarters. Put tortilla on bottom, top with cheese, tortilla on top, close and wait.

I had one already…a non-stick pan and pizza cutter.

Re: diaper genie: My solution was to keep a box of cheap-o zipper plastic sandwich bags by the wipes. Soiled diapers get put in one of those, zipped shut, and dropped in a regular ol’ trash can. NO stink!

Having dealt with the stink of a spilled diaper rail (my landlord’s kid), I thought the Diaper Genie was great. “Useless” doesn’t describe it. You mean “overpriced and Not Needed”, wbhich is different.

But I agree with gotpasswords – grocery bags have holes. I know - I use 'em for bagging cat box scoopings. Not realiable.

The Diaper Genie was always there, always worked, and I could operate it with one hand. Useless it ain’t.

Normally, I wouldn’t complain, it would be like complaining that you have to crack an egg before cooking it, or boil potatoes before mashing them, or steep a tea bag in hot water for 3 minutes. It’s just what you do to have the product.

You put a frozen lump of OJ in a pitcher and pour water over it, you get orangey water with a lump of frozen OJ in the middle. You have to poke at it and mush it up for a while before it melts enough to fully mix.

OTOH, you put room temperature OJC in a pitcher, pour water over it, and you just have to stir. It’s also less expensive to transport and store room temperature cans, and most folks have more pantry room than freezer room. I think it’s pretty clear, room temperature OJC would be more convenient to use than frozen OJC. It may be a crappy product overall, but that’s a different point.

:eek:

{removes glove}
{slaps california jobcase}

I demand satisfaction!

The Pasta Express.

Because cooking pasta is such a hassle in the first place why not add an extra step?
Old way:

  1. Boil water in pot.
  2. Add pasta to cook.
  3. Drain water.
    New way:
  4. Boil water in pot.
  5. Transfer boiling water to a tube.
  6. Add pasta to cook.
  7. Drain water.

(p.s. Pasta cooks pretty well in boiling water. Not so well in sub-boiling water.)

My SIL buys all this crap-which she uses once, then pawns off on my wife. The “slap chop” thing is a joke-it’s all plastic, and breaks on the first or second use.
I particularly like the spaghetti pot (the one with holes in the top so you can drain the water). The aluminum is so thin, it has already warped.
Ironically, CVS has a whole isle devoted to junk “As seen in TV”-you might as well just throw your money away.

Ah, but what if you don’t have ice? Or do you like room temperature beverages?! Frozen OJ takes up less space than a pack of ice.

Trying to picture a “pack of ice”

Now I want orange juice. Better yet, a FOJC and vodka screwdriver.

Bag, ice tray, container, etc. Dangnabit, people keep their ice in a lot of ways!

You forgot
5) Throw away gluey, half cooked pasta
6) Eat tomato sauce on white bread for dinner

Ice is multi purpose. I can cool down a glass of OJ, or a glass of water or soothe my aching head when my wife hits me with a rolling pin for complaining AGAIN about my damn frozen orange juice.

Make me one, too, please!