I’ve seen numerous auctions for raccoon penis bones(such as here), and I’ve wondered: What are those things good for?
Can anyone think of a use for one?
I actually found a squirrel penis bone in one of my field school digs in college… archaeology makes you learn all sorts of interesting things. Apparently, they were carried in medicine pouches.
So you could carry your raccoon penis bone in a medicine pouch…
I am sure raccoons find them useful for something.
Make a keychain.
They’re supposed to bring about virility. Use it instead of the little blue pill. 
I hear they usually are made into necklace pendants and stuff.
Just a WAG but they could easily be finding their way to China and Chinese medicine.
You could pry open the jaws of a small animal…like a cat! Then watch as it busted the bone in two, like the hydra does in *Willow.
My friend has a 2’ whale penis. I mean he has one that used to belong to a whale.
Oh my good lord, that was side splitting.
**“I shoved it down my pants, up my butt, and ran for the door.” **
These two lines were displayed in close proximity. Did you preview before you posted, wishbone?
Damn! I didn’t take my own advice…
Let’s try that again.
Unfortunate juxtaposition?
As I understand it, the raccoon’s bacculum (penis bone) has a bit of a hook at the business end that makes it a useful toothpick.
Many years ago, I worked with a guy who claimed to have (and use) such a toothpick; however, he never whipped it out in my presence.
It also makes a mighty fine hairpin.
To be serious for a moment, raccoon penis bones have a small hole near one end. They can thus be easily converted into small sewing needles. I eliminates te frustration and difficulty of trying to successfully drill an eye into your average carved-bone needle. The Amerindians did this, IIRC.
Another use of a raccoon penis bone, if you happen to be a raccoon, is to have raccoon sex and make little raccoons.