Were whales penises ever made into golf bags?

[MelCthefirst]

My mum told me that they used to make whales penises into golf bags because they were a good size. Does anyone know if this is true? I couldn’t find any references to this on the web but did find a site about a whales penis museum and one with pictures of excited whales! Apparently it is a very soft leather, so maybe too soft for a golf bag?

[Ike_Witt]

I have trouble believing that it is true. Then again, I had trouble believing that people would crawl into whales to get the last bit of oil out, until I saw pictures of somebody doing it.

[Tars_Tarkas]

If its true, how much do you think a whale penis golf bag costs? i don’t play golf, but the bag would be a great conversation piece and annoy PETA at the same time!

[Mangetout]

Apparently it takes four skin divers to make one.

[The_Ryan]

There was a Dave Berry gift guide that mentioned a purse made out of bull scrotum, so it’s possible that there are these too.

[Sofa_King]

Well, since we’re calling an Ishmael an Ishmael, it’s worth noting that our buddy Herman Melville mentions a particular incident where a whale’s foreskin is tailored into a jacket.

"Look at the sailor, called the mincer, who now comes along, and assisted by two allies, heavily backs the grandissimus, as the mariners call it, and with bowed shoulders, staggers off with it as if he were a grenadier carrying a dead comrade from the field. extending it upon the forecastle deck, he now proceeds cylindrically to remove its dark pelt, as an African hunter the pelt of a boa. This done he turns the pelt inside out, like a pantaloon leg; gives it a good stretching, so as almost to double its diameter; and at last hangs it, well spread, in the rigging, to dry. Ere long, it is taken down; when removing some three feet of it, towards the pointed extremity, and then cutting two slits for arm-holes at the other end, he lengthwise slips himself bodily into it. The mincer now stands before you invested in the full canonicals of his calling…

“Arrayed in decent black; occupying a conspicuous pulpit; intent on bible leaves–what a candidate for an archbishoprick, what a lad for a Pope this mincer.” (chapter 95)

Heh. He said “archbishoprick.”

Also, Aristotle Onassis’ yacht had bar stools covered in whale foreskin.

[Boyo_Jim]

This site says whale hides were used for, “bootlaces, carriage covers, and mailbags”.

Why not golf bags?

But no penis reference

[Cisco]

*Originally posted by The Ryan *
**There was a Dave Berry gift guide that mentioned a purse made out of bull scrotum, so it’s possible that there are these too. **

I have a coin purse made out of a kangaroo’s scrotum. Well, I wouldn’t even say “made out of”, it is a kangaroo’s scrotum.

[David_Simmons]

*Originally posted by MelCthefirst *
**My mum told me that they used to make whales penises into golf bags because they were a good size. Does anyone know if this is true? I couldn’t find any references to this on the web but did find a site about a whales penis museum and one with pictures of excited whales! Apparently it is a very soft leather, so maybe too soft for a golf bag? **

Mums shouldn’t kid around like that.

[ricecake]

There was a Dave Berry gift guide that mentioned a purse made out

My buddy has one of those, it brings him good luck

[ageless6]

Mangetout:

“four skin divers to make one”

I know you are appropriately ashamed and I accept your apology.

[Dijon_Warlock]

*Originally posted by The Ryan *
**There was a Dave Berry gift guide that mentioned a purse made out of bull scrotum, so it’s possible that there are these too. **

You can also get canes “fashioned from the reproductive organ of a bull or buffalo” in the special 9-11 Memorial Edition for all you patriotic folks. How’s that for a flagpole!?

[Philster]

I don’t know about the golf bags, but I’ve played with a few golfers who might as well have been whale penises.

I doubt there is any truth to it.

Where are all the “fore!” jokes about foreskin? How about the ball jokes?

People, missing the SDBM has made ye rusty.

[electrokungfu]

I heard the term “dork” was originally used for a whale’s penis. The ladies in the New England whaling towns would use them to replace their men who were on long whaling trips.

[Alereon]

While dork does in fact mean penis, I SERIOUSLY doubt that your story is factual. I believe a whale’s penis is bigger than an ENTIRE HUMAN, much less small enough to use for…ahem. See Sofa King’s post on using whale foreskin as an overcoat.

[Mangetout]

*Originally posted by FDISK *
**While dork does in fact mean penis, I SERIOUSLY doubt that your story is factual. I believe a whale’s penis is bigger than an ENTIRE HUMAN… **

Erect or flaccid?

Seriously though, I expect the size depends on the species of whale.