Please remember, she said she was pissed not because I wasn’t paying attention to her, but simply because she thought people in DC don’t carry on cell phone conversations in public.
Of course, that could have just been another shining example of how the women in my life tend to say one thing and mean another, but the whole thing’s moot anyway. We haven’t seen each other in a couple years.
If they aren’t being particularly loud and their ringer is turned off, why can’t they take the call at the table? How is their chatter any worse than the chatter coming from all the tables around you?
I don’t own a cell phone but occasionally borrow my wife’s. I don’t talk loud - in fact, if anything, I talk in a whisper, I never receive calls on it, and I try to get out of the way. People still look at me like I’ve just shot their dog.
At my wife’s last midwife appointment, we ran into this first hand. The room was relatively quite and peacefull, until this gal’s cell phone rang. She proceeded to have a conversation at a loud enough level to disrupt my (and the people sitting around me) reading…and to hear every damn word she was saying. The irony in this event was when some topic occured that she did NOT want others to hear…so she then walked the long and arduous 15 feet to the spacious lobby of the building.
So, it’s not like she was clueless that her conversation was loud enough to be heard by others, she could give a shit. It’s only when SHE decided that the topic was private, that SHE walked the long 15 feet to the lobby.
Of course at that point the nurse called her name out…so she never got to finish her crucial conversation with her girlfriend about what they were going to do that weekend. :rolleyes:
Bets? In my experience, people who claim they are unlike (and superior in abilities to) other people are probably just kidding themselves.
I work in a large industrial park and it seems that every employee of every company ties a cell phone to their head the moment they get out of work and begins manuvering their large clumsy SUVs around the crowded parking lot with one hand. Talking on the phone may or may not be unsafe behavior, but driving through parking lots with one hand and only half your mind on the job – that’s just stupid.
To get back to the OP, I’m one of those people who is illogically hostile towards cell phones, largely because I simply can’t comprehend, absolutely can’t wrap my mind around the notion, that someone would go out to dinner (or whatever) and be so tied to the phone that they can’t leave it behind. A couple of days ago I was having dinner in a restaurant and a guy at the next table got two or three calls (loud annoying ringer) that were clearly social and unimportant. I couldn’t figure out why, if I were out with two or three friends, why I would leave my phone on. What, are you hoping for a better offer?
But then, I suspect that there’s a larger dichotomy that we all fall into – people who actually like talking on the phone and for whom this is a major part of their social intercourse, and people like myself who actively dislike phone calls and regard them as an unpleasant occasional necessity. One camp welcomes being in constant contact, even if it’s just a banal conversation, the other camp welcomes being left alone and, in the case of cell phones, resents the intrusion of someone else’s conversation in their personal space.
obfusciatrist, of course you have a point. My snide, patented SDMB answer is “don’t eat in those restaurants if you have a problem with it.” 
My real answer is that taking long calls at the dinner table is rude to whomever you are dining with. And I don’t think some people realize how loud they are talking when they talk on cell phones - in the struggle to overcome reception problems, background noise that the person on the other end might be experiencing, etc.
As far as restaurants go, if you turn the ringer off, if your dining companion does not mind, **if ** you keep your voice at a reasonable level, if you are expecting an important call, etc., etc., fine, whatever. I’m not writing the rules of cell phone use, just want people to think about the effect they have on (barring expectation a really important call) during a dinner with me, I’d leave.
As far as “mundane and pointless” cell phone conversations vs. “important” cell phone conversations…who can judge, really? I understand the plight of all of the folks who have only a cell phone or for whom it is absolutely vital for business purposes. They are terribly convenient and can provide a lifeline. Cell phone users, I think all the “annoyed by cell phone users” want is for you to think about how you are affecting others.
Think about the fact that everyone around you can hear everything you say. Actually, depending on the environment, they have to hear everything you say, whereas you have the choice to stop talking. My office is an open work environment, everyone has a desk with a few partitions. But because loud or long telephone conversations are distracting and annoying to nearby people they also have private phone booths where you can go to talk.
Think honestly about whether talking on the phone impedes other things you are doing - driving, walking, paying for things. Are you holding up lines? Does it seem like people are always cutting in front of you?
Know when to turn it off. You’ve got voice mail, right? You don’t have to take every single call. So have dinner, hang with your friends, go see movies, etc. Relax, enjoy. Experiment with silence.
I can’t stress this enough: Chatter is annoying. If you are going to use a phone in a public place where people are mostly quiet, say what you gotta say and get off the phone. It’s not rude if you don’t. There are no rules against it. So this is pretty much me begging here.
Umm… 
I don’t really find people who use cell phones in public annoying. It’s just like two people having a conversation in public, just one isn’t there.
The problem I have with cell phones and cars is that the driver usually has the phone in one hand and drives w/ the other. The headset doesn’t bother me, its just like talking to another person in the car. In MD hand-held cell phone use is illegal (or will be soon, not sure when it goes into effect) which to me is a good thing.
Although, just because you have a cell phone doesn’t mean that you are excluded from being curtious to those around you. I don’t see why some people think that it is ok for them to have a loud conversation in a waiting area, when you would talk in a wisper to the person beside of you, or why you would take a call on your cell phone when you are out with your friends when you would say “hey can I call you later?” if the person called you at your home.
My husband and I were walking through a park when we passed a man lying on a hillside watching a baseball game.
The man said, “Hey, can you do me a favor?”
How odd, to request a favor of two strangers walking past! My immediate thought was perhaps that he was hurt, his back was out and he couldn’t get up, and he needed help.
We both stopped and looked expectantly at him.
He noticed us staring, mouthed, “Sorry!” and showed us the tiny cell phone he was using.
It wasn’t rude, just weird. 
Knee-jerk moderate that I am, I figure that there’s a certain cell-phone etiquette and as a society we’ll eventually shake out a consensus on what that is. I think it’s almost universally agreed that some cell behaviours are unacceptable, but others are on the borderline.
I find it unpleasant to have to listen someone conversing on a cell phone in public, even when they are not speaking loudly, but I can’t put my finger on why it’s more annoying than two people talking. I guess that I’ll get used to it with time, particularly if I get a cell phone myself.
However, I cannot abide getting a dirty look from a cell phone user because my conversation with an actual person standing physically next to me is interfering with their phone call. If you’re in your living room and a call comes in, on your cell or your landline, you’re perfectly within your rights to ask the people in the room to please be quiet while you pursue your telephone conversation. If you are in public you have no right to expect others to lower their tones because you’re on the phone. You can take your portable phone and go find a quiet place to talk where you are neither inconvenienced by, nor inconveniencing, anyone else.
That’s my take on it - some people have very loud voices and people tend to speak louder when they are on a cell phone. It is just as annoying when 1 person is much louder then the rest in a group.
On a simular note this is how I feel about smokers - I support their right to smoke till they croak where ever and when ever they want just as long as I don’t have to smell their exhaust.
Sounds like a good IMHO topic to me.
It’s partly that…it’s partly an attitude of awareness. I own and use a cell phone…but try to exhibit some common courtesy when I do so. If I’m at the local grocery store, with all the racket and cart noises, asking my wife on the phone about what kind of mustard to pick up , it’s probably not a disruptive event.
If I’m in a quiet bookstore, or quiet restaurant…and your full volume cell phone conversation sticks out like a sore thumb amidst the relatively hushed conversations, then it appears that (a) you have no clue about your surroundings, or (b) could give a shit about your surroundings. It’s the second attitude that really pisses me off, which is why my example at the midwife office seemed so obnoxious.
Then again, it could be what mrs beagledave said to me “it probably makes her feel important”…
I confess: when I got my current cellphone, I chose it specifically because one of its built-in rings was “Eine Kleine Nachtmusik,” which is one of my all time favorite pieces of music. So I have joined the Cutesy Ring Club. :o
My husband and I don’t HAVE a landline anymore, except in our respective offices. It saves loads of money that way - free long distance is a wonderful thing, especially when your phone is being paid for by your company. But it means that we now get calls in public which used to be strictly private. It’s been an adjustment for both of us - when we used to go to dinner together and know that, except in an emergency, the phones wouldn’t be ringing (vibrating, actually), now we don’t have that guarantee. But that, folks, is why there is voice mail. Nobody has to take every call.
I have a hands free. I love it - I use it all the time, even when I’m not driving. So, to people who are looking at the wrong side of my head, I just look like I’m talking to myself. I see no problem with people conversing in grocery stores and the like. If people conversing (whether both parties are present or not) is a problem, it’s generally their volume or conversation topic that annoys you, rather than the manner in which they’re carrying on.
Every time I hear a cellphone conversation in public, I’m reminded of one of the Onion’s sidebar articles: “Cellphone User Tells Girlfriend, Entire Post Office, That He Can Change and He’s Sorry.” Something like that, anyway.
Keeping phone conversations private reminds me of the quaint notion of PHONE BOOTHS. Remember those?? When people would go into the little booth to talk on the phone? There was always a certain mystery to those little closet-like contraptions. ::waxing nostalgic::
I have always been of the school that I don’t want other people being privy to my conversations, so I always excuse myself when my cell phone must be answered. I agree with those that have said in certain social situations (dates, movies, dinner) you should minimize the cell phone usage, but all in all, I think it’s something we just need to get used to.
I have to have a cell phone. It is extremely hard to reach me at work. If you call my direct line, 99% of time I’m on a call.
I do set my phone on Lock mode so it goes automatically to my voice mail. It will beep once to let me know I have a message. I can call my voice mail and see if I have to return the call.
Any intimate conversations I have on my cell are held far away from other people. The corn field by my office is a favorite place. I know a Doper who can’t drive by a cornfield now without getting aroused.
Like porcupine, magdalene, and others have touched on, I think the problem is the VOLUME at which 90% of cell phone calls take place. There’s just something about cell phones that cause people to speak in a louder than normal conversational volume.
For example, if I’m shopping in the grocery store with my hubby, I might say “Honey, do we need eggs this week?” in a quiet, conversational tone, that likely no one else would even hear or pay attention to. A typical cell phone call at the grocery might be “HELLO! YEAH IT’S ME. DO WE NEED EGGS? WHAT? NO, EGGS I SAID, ARE WE OUT? BREAD? YEAH, GOT SOME. OK. WHAT? FROOT LOOPS? WHAT?” ad nauseum.
Same thing with restaurant conversations. If I concentrate, I can eavesdrop on the juicy conversation at the next table, but usually it just blends into background noise. Not with a cell phone, though, the entire section hears every single word!
As for social situations, whether it be with friends, a date, whatever, taking a prolonged phone call (cell or landline) in someone else’s prescence is just rude. Either don’t answer the phone at all, or simply say “Excuse me, I’m busy right now, when can I call you back?”
Cell phones, while not rude in and of themselves, facilitate a lot of rude behavior.
I don’t have a cellphone, I don’t particularly want to be that accessible.
I don’t think using a cellphone in public is rude. But, tripping over someone because you’re not paying attention to where you’re going is rude. Bumping into people is rude. Talking too loud in public is rude. Talking at all in certain places (theaters/movie theaters) is rude. Ignoring people around you to whom you should be paying attention or displaying common courtesy is rude. The fact that you’re doing these things because a cellphone is attached to your ear doesn’t make them less rude.
On the other hand, having a quiet conversation in a place where such things are generally acceptable, is ok whether the person you’re conversing with is physically present or on the other end of the phone.
(Aside: My favorite burger place bans cellphones. I highly, highly doubt they’re losing money for the ban. (If they are, thank goodness - otherwise it would be more crowded than anything.))
Podkayne, I hate to “ditto post”, but I agree with everything you have said. So, ditto, and thank you for providing the example of polite cell phone use.
IMHO, while cell phones are great tools, I think that people assume that a change in technology somehow allows or necessitates a change in behavior. Usually, this doesn’t have to be the case.[ul][li]It doesn’t matter whether you are turning from your dinner companions to read a book or if you are looking through them as you chat to someone else on a cell phone–the impression is given that what you are doing is more important than the people around you.[]I could read a book aloud in public, and people nearby would tell me to shut up if I bothered them.[]Last week, I was in a checkout line behind someone who talked on his phone while the clerk rang up his order, which isn’t much different from how people ignored clerks when I was a clerk fifteen years ago.[/ul][/li]Calling people Luddites (or geeks, for that matter) distracts from the real issue. It’s not the technology, it’s the behavior.
[sub](Sorry, post in to TubaDiva to find out how to indent w/o bullets.)[/sub]
[sub]Hello, It’s me[/sub]
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[sub]Me[/sub]
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[sub]I’m on the train, I’ll be…[/sub]
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I said I’m on…
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I’M ON THE TRAIN
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NO, THE TRAIN!
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YOU’RE BREAKING UP
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I SAID I’M ON THE TRAIN!!
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YES!!
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YES, I’LL BE HOME AT THE USUAL TIME!!
We’re overrun with cell phones in Madrid and it’s getting worse. A few years back the guy in the urinal next to me took a phone call while peeing. Last month a guy from the next door office took a call in the while pooping in the bathroom. A friend of mine took a call in the middle of a funeral mass (she was a little tipsy at the time).
Now if you need to ask directions on the street or talk to someone in our office you have to see if they’re on the phone.
Call me old fashioned, but I still prefer the old fashioned land lines but I do like the speaker phone option.