My ex and I did make a big deal out of Valentine’s Day, but always with a bent toward setting aside some extra time for just us. The whole cutesy commercialism thing always disgusted me. (I am also a major Humbug about the whole Xmas-gift thing, btw.) So when we first started dating, I spelled out in no uncertain terms that she would never get flowers on Valentine’s Day because the flower shops triple their prices then. Instead, I would get her flowers from time to time, “just because.”
Worked very well for both of us, throughout dating and our marriage. Other factors doomed our relationship, but Valentine’s was not among them.
IMO, there’s nothing wrong with observing a special day like Valentine’s or Xmas, as long as the focus is the people who are important to you, not the stuff.
Happily single once again, and looking forward to staying that way.
I’m in a relationship for the first ever on Valentines Day this year. We’ve agreed only buy each other a little gift.
I agree that people tend to go over board on V Day, but if they want to it doesn’t bother me. Its not my money they’re spending.
The last few years I’ve enjoyed V Day. Last year I got roses and love poetry of a guy friend who was/is(?) in love with me. The year before that my girl friends and I sent cards to each other. It was really nice.
**** getting the f outta here, as suggested by Jen ****
Jen, I sh*t you not, I’m on your side. And I swear I’m not gloating. It’s more like agreeing with you about the BS of Valentines Day. I’m lucky THIS YEAR. You don’t want me to tell you about the others. I met my fiancé in May. This is our first Valentines together (though we’re on opposite ends of the world).
If this was a singles exclusives club, I apologize profusely for the inadherance to the understood ‘secretive club’ rules. But I do understand. Believe me, I do. I don’t think that me being with someone should automatically exclude me from the game.
But if it does, then fine. I’ll be having (phone)sex with my guy on Valentines Day while he tells me how his life is incomplete without the most wonderful (sexy, intelligent, understanding, empathetic, beautiful, loving) woman in the world. To each his own I guess.
Shade: Yeah, the week before valentines day is the perfect time to dump someone by letting them see you kissing someone else after you’ve spent two weeks cuddling them. Feck. Occluded (Shade Friend): Forget her. Plan a fun saturday thinking about something else. Shade: Yeah! I’m planning on hiding in a small dark hole slashing myself with a sharp knife. Woo!
But on reflection V-day isn’t really bad. Everyone takes it to stupid extremes, but for people who do love someone, it is a nice reminder to show it. So long as when we don’t we don’t feel we SHOULD.
Ok, CheekyMonkey613 , I accept that was probably excessively harsh. In all seriousness, I wish you and your intended every joy. But do me a favour - read my OP again. Then read your reply. Then try to understand why reading your reply made me want to hunt you down, cover you in red lipstick kiss-marks - and then strangle you with a string of pink fluffy love hearts. Plus I’m drugged up to my eyeballs on pain meds at the moments, so probably shouldn’t be held responsible for anything I say or do at the moment.
Hunter Hawk , I don’t know that he was being snarky, or even that he’s such a big fan of VD - I think he’s just really obsessed with offal. If I’ve told him once, I’ve told him a thousand times - I’m not eating anything’s liver.
Scuba Ben , I’m Catholic, so don’t get the Passover reference. Is there something I’m missing. Please explain.
Dangit, I had a post all typed out and the hamsters ate it.
Trying again.
Jennyrosity, I’m with you. In college my friends and I figured since it’s become a Hallmark Holiday anyway, we’d just make our own holiday that coincidentally fell on Feb. 14. It was called Black Vomit Day and is celebrated by wearing black and watching slasher flicks. Feel free to celebrate with DogDad and I this year! (You don’t have to actually come over; we can just all celebrate it at once.)
And this:
is the Very Most Perfectest description of the OTHER holiday that’s celebrated on Black Vomit Day I’ve ever seen. May I use it as a sig?
One of the ritual foods on Passover is a bitter herb, such as fresh horseradish root. If I could reduce your OP into a food, we could use it for Passover.
Yeah, what the heck is going on over yonder on your side of the Pond? Why are you all bitterly single at the same time? (Angua excepted, of course, because she apparently has a spare harem tucked in the closet for a rainy day or something.)
You seemed like such a friendly and cheerful bunch; why isn’t it translating into romance? Is romance dead in the U.K.? Even my married friend I visited in Kent is complaining that her husband has lost all sense of romance, and is contemplating letting her buy contact lenses for Valentine’s Day to replace her 6-year-old glasses. Nice gestures don’t have to be extravagant; even a backrub (completely free) and some flowers picked from the garden would be a pleasant surprise.
Well, anyone who happens to be in my neck of the woods on Saturday night is cordially invited to an alternative V-Day activity of some sort, because Lord knows the only man who is going to be touching me on Saturday at this point is my dentist. Some company would be nice; maybe I’ll even cook!
Ro-mance? Eva, what is this ro-mance of which you speak? The word seems vaguely familiar, but I can’t really place it.
See, I’m married to one of those guys who claims that Valentines Day shouldn’t be a big deal; every day should be a celebration of our love. So Valentine’s Day, like every other day of the year, I read and pick dog hair off my sweater while listening to the clack of his keyboard until his snoring puts the cap on another confetti-filled celebration of our love. This seems to be a pattern with this kind of guy; Valentine celebrations are eschewed in favor of year-round romance, but the year-round stuff never quite seems to materialize.
Little expressions of love abound if you look for them, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. Still, I can’t help but think it must be awfully nice to be able to look forward to one romantic evening a year.
Eva Luna , I think we’re just naturally more bitter and cynical on this side of the pond and stuff like Valentines just brings it out in us. You Merkins seem to be generally more positive and up-beat. After all, “the Pursuit of Happiness” is written into your constitution. If we Brits had a constitution, our equivalent would probably be “Mustn’t Grumble”. And then we would.
But yes, I think you’re right. Also, there’s fewer of is, so a few of us happening to be bitter can dominate the whole UK doper scene before the happy ones get a look in
Though I’m not bitter any more. I don’t care about HER. I’m going to be happy with friends, and perhaps a moderate amount of alcohol. Happy shiny bright an glowy positive optmistic clear good valentines day! Woo!
