Vending Machine of Dooooooom

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

My sad tale of horror…

So, 11am rolled around, as I had not had breakfast it occurred to me some sort of food type substance might be appropriate. I didn’t really have the time or energy to embark on a lunch mission so I strolled over to the vending machine in our breakroom and immediately eyed a 6 pack of minature powdered sugar donuts.

“Mmmmmm” said my stomach in its best Homer Simpson voice. “Donuts”.

80 cents later those little powder covered bundles of joy were mine, and I happily sauntered back to my desk oblivious to the horrible fate which awaited me.

You know how, when you are trying to eat and work at the same time, you sometimes get distracted?

And, you know how, when you are really hungry, you might not carefully examine the food type item before you stuff it into your mouth?

It was the perfect storm of stupidity and lack of concentration.

As I chewed through that first bite sized donut, the happy sugar related thoughts rattling around in my brain quickly turned instead to thoughts of consternation and confusion.

“This tastes burnt!”

chew chew

“Thats kind of weird… how do you burn a pre-packaged donut?”

chew chew

“Man something isn’t right here, I should look at these donuts more closely”

swallow

"They look alright, let me just pick up donut number two here and…

BIG FLUFFY GREEN MOLD!! :eek: :eek: :eek:

ARRRGHHH!!!

So two lessons learned today.

  1. Always look at what you are eating.

  2. Mold tastes like burned donuts.

Anyone else have a vending machine horror story to share?

2

Some years back, I got a packet of chocolate covered donuts - with fresh, lively ants. :eek:

ick

3

Yeah, once I got a candybar at a gas station (this was long before all gas stations became minimarts), and it had clearly been in the vending machine a long time. I seem to recall little white writhing things.
And who hasn’t finished a yummy sandwich and gone back to make another only to discover that the bread was very moldy?

4

Forgot to add, because my boss wants to make sure we tell the vending machine guy about this incident, I now have a package of 5 moldy donuts in a ziploc bag in one of the bins in my cube. A constant reminder not only of moldy grossness, but also that there used to be 6. :frowning:

5

One of my best friends visited from Canada a few months ago, and brought me my favorite Canadian treat - a Mint Aero bar!

I saved it for a post lunch treat one day. Opened it up, broke off one small piece and began eating.

And then I noticed the small, black bugs crawling out of it.

I will never eat an Aero bar again.

E.

6

Hostess Cupcakes:
I ate the first cupcake, and picked up the second one. There was a 3 inch earth worm in the container’s bottom. It was fully under the second one. I almost lost it three times the first hour. I started to heave every time I saw a Hostess Cupcake for the next couple years. Fifteen years later and I have eaten one recently, and I found that I don’t like them anymore. That’s a supprise ain’t it.

Swiss Miss:
Three years ago I mixed up a Swiss Miss hot chocolate individual serving packet. I drank a small amount and decided I hadn’t stirred it enough. I stirred and the whitish lumps were not desolving. I tried breaking them up against the side of the mug with the spoon. The lumps were one eigth inch worms. The mix was in a sealed foil pouch, and it had worms. I only started to drink hot chocolate again last winter.

7

Wow! It’s like the best diet plan evar!

8

Not nearly as horrible but…
you know those hot drink machines tha serve coffee, tea, hot chocolate and chicken soup?
Well, I was having hot chocolate after my sister had checken soup and my sister observed that it is the same spout that delivers all the drinks,
so my drink was probably choco-chicken. :frowning: