Versus Alcohol

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Not sure if this is the right place to make this post, but I’m not a member of any other message board, so I thought to just give it a try.

I’ve been battling alcoholism for almost ten years. You must know at least one person in your life with the same story, because it’s very common. I have never managed to quit alcohol for any number of days except when there was a substitute, such as prescription drugs (pain killers, tranquilizers or sedatives) in order to put myself to sleep.

I am an extremely functioning alcoholic, and this made it harder for me to rationalize myself out of it. I never had black-outs or woke up not knowing where I was. Never lost a job because of my drinking habits, and never laid my hand on anyone because of alcohol (or any other reason). Not married, no children, and no bar fights either. I drank at least ten double shots of sic whiskey every night for many years. I’ve been on and off AA, and I claim that I have made my recent decision to stop away from the fellowship.

I found that what triggered my drinking were two things: wanting to sleep with someone (I’d have a few drinks at home then go out to a bar, hopeful for an encounter, and food; I love big dinners). Basically, appetite for sex and food. First two days I quit, I just arrived home from work, took care of the libido, and had a sandwich. Once this was taken care of, I didn’t feel like drinking.

Today is the seventh day that I’m clean and serene. I’ve just spent the weekend at home and managed to dodge any invitations to go out. It’s evening right now where I live, and if I manage to go to bed without a drink, tomorrow will be the eighth day. I’ve thrown away every last drop of alcohol I had in the house. I’m writing this because it’s a mundane pointless thing I must share.

2

Best wishes to you on continuing an alcohol-free life. It’s neither mundane, nor pointless, though. :slight_smile:

3

Agreed. Your health and well being are at stake, so finding a serene place sans alcohol is a very big deal. Congratulations.

4

Eight days is a thousand times better (and tougher) than seven days. Seven days is a thousand times better than six days. And so on. See how far you’ve come? Kudos! Keep up the good work!

5

I quit drinking at 40. I was similar to you in that I was fully functioning. I was just unhappy about the quality of my life. I will often say that procrastination was my biggest trigger and I also acted out sexually. Looking back almost 27 years I realize now I just was not living up to my own standards in any areas of my life. I have become a much better person by dealing with things sober instead of drinking them away. My sex addiction went away about the same time my drinking did. Sex is somewhat validating although fleeting.

Getting into action even if it means just taking baby steps at first will help to assure long term recovery. I confess to using some pot on occassion when I am suffering from writers block but aside from that I have no desire for anything mind altering. I really enjoy having a clear head.
6

If you’re living mindfully of your future instead of just living for today, your life will keep getting better and better. Congratulations and good luck.

7

Keep it up, one day at a time. My little sister is four years sober and it was a three year struggle to get to eight days while not actively locked up in rehab - although I suspect the first TWO years were our struggle more than hers.

Congrats.

8

I have a good friend who used to drink a fifth over two days. He would take a drink in the morning and drink regularly during the day, every day. He was never drunk, always taught his classes (he was a university professor), but always drank. Finally, his doctor told him he had early liver disease and if he didn’t stop he would kill himself. Having excellent insurance (and a two month summer vacation) he spent a month in a dryout center. It worked and he stopped. Some years later, he did start drinking socially again, one beer or one glass of wine with dinner.

For a number of years my wife and I took a two week vacation trip with him and his wife. He bought a 40oz bottle of rum when we arrived and every night he made a batch of frozen daiquiris and we drank them, he no more than the rest of us. We didn’t finish the bottle in two weeks and that was all the drinking he did for two weeks. I mention to emphasize how modest his drinking is.

He will be 80 in four weeks and stopped a bit over 30 years ago.

9

Good for you, and good luck. :slight_smile:

10

Hang tough. Any way you can do it ( stop ) if not illegal is a good way IMO.

11

Congrats and best wishes. Stay strong!

12

An illegal method of quitting alcohol? Like swapping drinks for drugs?

13

You tend to drink when you’re hungry or lonely? Learn to cook. *

I suck at it! But it gives you something to think about! And plan. That takes care of hungry. Lonely sounds like a cooking class…or something like that.

I’m a feeder and I eat. Once I found that out about myself, I was much calmer and it made not drinking much easier.
*On rereading that sounded snarky.
Also hugging you, b/c it is hard.

14

I’ve been cutting for a while now. Hopefully you’ll feel the energy flow to you as soon as you remember all that other stuff you wanted to do at some point. It’s important to stay descisive, so I reccomend you find something time consuming to do that will keep you interested, not as a substitute, but for recreation, battleing that boredom. I like to drink, so I switched to jasmin tea.

If you start to feel withdrawals, or feeling bad physically or psychologically and you suspect it might be related, go to your doctor or the ER. If you need to be administered alchohol for withdrawal, they should have much better control than you. Withdrawals could become lethal.

15

Dear Blackstock,

Love yourself. Take care of yourself the way you’d take care of anybody else you love. Every day you don’t drink is that much better – and that’s true no matter how many you’ve managed this far.

  • Sober 29 years 2 months 10 days
16

Blackstock, how incredilbly insightful those realizations are. Good for you and best of luck in your now wide-open future.

17

I think you should continue this endeavor. Mostly because the alternative is a very dark, ugly choice.
It’s almost like you have no other choice, if you consider the big picture.
Yea…keep doing what you are doing. I believe you will be successful and you will inspire others to save themselves.

18

Wishing you much success.

19

I am a recovering alkie with (ponders for a moment…) 11 years, 10 months and 6 days clean and sober.

I cannot speak for others, but there were a couple huge things that helped me get and stay sober.

The first was admitting it was a problem and that I had no control over it once I began drinking.

Next was finding something to take my mind away. I had been drinking for so long that I didn’t know what else to do.

After that, I admitted to myself that I did not know how to stay sober. I tried. Seriously, a bunch of times. And everything I thought up and tried, failed.

So, with those three facts stuck in my head I did the most responsible thing. I abdicated. I gave up. I stopped trying to solve my own problem and went to others to see if they could solve my problem. In my case, this was A.A and a shrink.

When you break a leg, you go see a doctor. When your car breaks, you take it to a mechanic. In other words, you consult an expert.

I needed sobriety so I found people who had achived sobriety and did what they did. And it worked.

Some people don’t like A.A. Thats cool. Find someone else who can help you stop drinking and also fix the problems that make you want to drink.

Quitting is fairly easy. I know, I did it often. Staying sober is the hard part and that requires work.

The wonderful part is, if you do the work life becomes wonderful.

I went from a smart, successful I.T. guy to a homeless drunk. Then I found help and went from a homeless drunk to a successful, married I.T. guy. And three months ago I became a Dad to twin boys.

During the dark days I never imagined, no, I couldn’t imagine living life any other way. Getting the next drink was all that mattered, no matter how bad my life was at that time.

Now I can’t imagine life any other way. It is a cliche, but my worst day sober is way better than my best day drunk.

Good luck. If you feel like talking, PM me and I will be happy to offer any support and suggestions I can.

Slee

20

I wish you all the best, Blackstock.

AA definitely isn’t for everyone. I do hope you can find an alternative group or network, though, because the fellowship is so important.

And please oh please do not substitute prescription meds for alcohol. That’s a very bad road to go down. You might consider seeing your doctor for some legit meds, though. I believe there’s some new stuff out there, and someone else might be able to tell you more about it.

Good luck to you.