Magneto vs. the Metal Men.
Magneto would win in a second.
Can you think of any other very short battles?
The Hulk vs. Aunt May
Zev Steinhardt
that depends…is this in the alternate timline where Aunt May becomes herald of Galactus and leads him away from planet-devouring and gets him hooked on off-brand Twinkies?
I was hoping no one would remember that issue of Marvel Team-Up (Aunt May and Franklin Richards)…
OK, how about Magneto vs. Iron Man? yeah, yeah, I know the armor isn’t really iron…
Ultra Man (was it Ultra Man who was afraid of flames? It’s been several years since I read Marvels) vs. the Human Torch?
Zev Steinhardt
Aquaman vs. Little Lulu.
The Rachel Summers Phoenix vs. Nova, Herald of Galactus. Phoenix punched Nova to the moon.
Daredevil vs. Galactus!
Close–it was one of my favorites, Captain Ultra (the hero who can do anything better than you). But his shrink later cured him of his pyrophobia
I thought this was going to be a thread for folks to reminescence about their favorite comic-book quickie fights. And I was all set to nominate Spider-Man (present) vs. Spider-Man (2099) in the crossover one-shot they had, too.
Spider-Man (present): “Look, I know how this goes – we meet up, we have a misunderstanding, we fight, we straighten things out, we go stop the villian, but time’s short, so can we just jump straight to the villian part?”
(And I liked the Galactus-Aunt May-Franklin Richards team-up! Golden Oldie! 
)
I always liked the Batman vs Guy Gardner fight from Justice League. Guy finally snaps and challenges Batman to a fight, telling Blue Beetle to hold his Green Lantern ring. Batman punches him once in the face and Guy is knocked out, to the mirth of all.
Lobo vs Richie Rich’s mom
Whatever the other universe creature who caused “Secret Wars 1” and was the main feature of “Secret Wars 2” vs anyone.
Banshee vs Dazzler
The Saint of Killers vs pretty much anyone except someone with god-voice.
The Mummy vs The Human Torch
Me vs a meatball sub
Whatever the other universe creature who caused “Secret Wars 1” and was the main feature of “Secret Wars 2” vs anyone.
Banshee vs Dazzler
The Saint of Killers vs pretty much anyone except someone with god-voice.
The Mummy vs The Human Torch
Me vs a meatball sub
Given that The Beyonder casually kicked Galactus’s ass, I’d agree with #1. Reminds me of Tom the Dancing Bug’s “God-Man”.
Posted by zen101:
“Anyone”? Don’t forget, at the end of Secret Wars 2, the Beyonder got his ass kicked by the Molecule Man!
How about the Mighty Thor vs. Jack Chick’s Crusaders! (They think God’s on THEIR side, do they?)
Damon Hellstrom and the Ghost Rider vs. Hot Stuff!
Wolverine vs. The Smurfs!
The Punisher vs. Archie!
$50 says the kid takes fishface in 3 rounds.
Why do I have the image of Wolverine confronting a Smurf, then makes a disgusting face, and spits out “This is f@$kin’ ridiculous,” and stomps off somewhere to get a beer?
Already done. :eek:
pre-2000 Storm vs. a tiny box
All right, how about Sabertooth vs. Millie the Model?
Poopeye vs. Bart Simpson (Yes, I meant Poopeye.)