Wal*Mart's interseting new spin on "The Hobbit"

I saw this on another board and thought it had to be fake. I went to the Wal*Mart site and searched there. It’s real.


If you’re wondering what I’m talking about, read the book description…


Woah…I completely forgot about that part of the novel. I’m guessing Maurice is an Elf, then?

I’m confused. Is Maurice actually Thorin or Gloin?

And who’s the chick with the kids? And where in Middle Earth is the Thames?

Tolkien is so hard to follow!

That’s it. I’m goin’ to WalMart. Gotta get me one of those!

It’s so rare that I find my jaw has actually dropped open in shock and amazement… it’s kind of a huge cliche, and when it actually happens… wow… and to think how hard people work to put homoeroticism between Sam/Frodo in LOTR, and it was right there all along in The Hobbit! :rolleyes:

I thought it might be a good idea to make sure those guys managing the Tolkien estate knew about this, so I did a google on “Tolkien Estate.” No ready links concerning this book, but the first couple pages were all about the Estate suing the asses off of anybody who even touched on the professor’s work without their official Seal o’ Approval, so I figure they’ll find out about it soon enough.

Still. :eek:

Looks like they somehow mixed the book description with the one for this one. :wally

And this from the family values/censorship store!


Aw! The page has been removed. What did it say?

The link seems to be dead. Would someone mind describing what we should be shocked about?

It was a product description for the Hobbit, and the book’s synopsis was: “On the Battersea Reach of the Thames, a mixed bag of eccentrics live in houseboats. Belonging to neither land nor sea, they belong to one another. There is Maurice, a homosexual prostitute; Richard, a buttoned-up ex-navy man; but most of all there’s Nenna, the struggling mother of two wild little girls. How each of their lives complicates the others is the stuff of this perfect little novel.The adventures of the well-to-do hobbit, Bilbo, Baggins, who lived happily in his comfortable home until a wandering wizard granted his wish.”

I’m guessing this is that book from the Harvard Publishing thingie that is the Hobbit spoof?

With Dildo Bugend?

I clicked on the link, and got:


The Book description started like this:

…or something close about Bilbo. Somehow they stuck the blurb for another book in front of the correct one for the hobbit.

Actually, Ferret Herder has the correct wording.

Never have read it, but is that early paragraph, perhaps, describing E.M. Forster’s Maurice? I know it’s a classic – the first novel by a major novelist to have incorporated an “out” homosexual as a more-or-less-sympathetic character, and was left unpublished until after his death. Scene sounds vaguely like what I vaguely remember reading about the book, 25 years ago.

No, it is describing Penelope Fitzgerald’s Offshore.

[http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=460363](You can see the picture halfway down this page.)

Or as Meatros intended to say:

You can see the screenshot of the page halfway down this page.


Oh my wierdness…I dunno how that happened…
Huh huh…
I’m going to go take my smart pills now :smiley: