Walking on Water caught on National Television....

I was watching the news and there was a special report. Local fishermen (off coast of Massachusetts) spotted this guy walking on the water. When they pulled their boat up next to him he said he was just out for a stroll. They immediately called the coast guard who promptly showed up to take care of this matter as quickly as they could and prove that these fishermen must have been drinking or something…But apparently when they got there there was a guy literally standing on the water. He looked like an average everyday Joe except for the pure fact that he was standing on the water and shoot’in the shit with these four fishermen.

Of course this is not a true story but I was wondering…what if this were to actually happen. What if one day the second coming of a Messiah, a true messiah were to show up in the world. Of course unlike in Jesus time there would eb a media blitz all over this guy and miracles could be cought on TV and the whole world would know in a matter of hours. Would people flock to this person? Would religious deligations want to disprove their own eyes? How would the world react to an actual messiah, someone who could really perform miracles, someone who could really cure the sick, walk on water, abolish inhumanity… How would the world react to a true honest to goodness ‘Jesus’ walking again on this earth…?

sorry for the spelling errors, I didn’t preview…:slight_smile:

Doesn’t witnessing belong in GD?

I doubt there is a single answer to this and I fully expect this’ll get shunted to GD, but I’ll have a go anyway. At a guess I’d say people would be split:

[li]Some people who’s religion allows for a second (or first) coming believe he (or she?) is the real Messiah and flock to him expecting whatever prophecies they have to come true.[/li][li]Other people who’s religion allows for a second etc, denounce him as a heritic/conjurer/devil and demand his death/stoning/extradition[/li][li]People who’s religion doesn’t allow for this do likewise[/li][li]Many (many) people convert to a religion that allows this and skip to point a)[/li][li]The undecided either ignore it, flock to him and ignore it or flock to him and convert.[/li][li]James Randi contacts his insurers and fishes around for his cheque book ;)[/li][/ul]

I suppose it depends what he does and how the split happens. I’m expecting massive conflict and argument. Whatever he does, short of mind-control or mass-murder, some people’ll just not believe it and some of them will start getting nasty.

If he claims that he is the messiah of a particular religion then it probably all goes to hell in a hand-cart, even if he’s an ambigous generic messiah you’ve got problems.

Certainly many people would demand scientific tests, people would want miracles done, PR companies would want to represent him.

This is a rather wandering answer, basically I think the general disagreement would lead to conflict. I can’t think of anything he could do to unite the world (or even a single country) behind him.

I’ll see if I can have some more coherent thoughts and post them later.


It might not be a messiah, perhaps just the first evolutionary step to adapt to global warming.

Next on Fox … Secrets of the Messiah Revealed!
Walk on Water? Heck, no - transparent Pontoon shoes!

Hypotheticals like this one are a no-no in GQ, but I suspect that he would be ignored, parlor tricks or not, just like the hundreds of other kooks proclaiming to be the next best thing in religion.

If walking on water were proof of divinity, wouldn’t we all be worshipping striders already?

a) Check water temperature. For temperatures significantly below 32° F, skip to section 4…

Walking on water, rather than a mark of divinity, is merely a matter of patience - you just wait for winter.


no I’m not talking about freezing water or transparent pontoon shoes… I am talking about the “what if’s” of the second/first coming of a bona fied messiah? I know some people would be quite pissed – " who the hell is this guy…walking on water… who does he think he is"

Well think about this: Maybe the ‘next coming’ will be someone who does not want to preach who does not want to lead anyone…maybe this guy or gal just wants to show the world by example what a human can do, and what humans now adays in this technological microcosm are forgeting…

Jeez…the last few ‘true’ messiahs taught love and acceptence of our fellow humans … we didn’t listen for the most part…

Well, if he showed up in the territorial waters of General Questions, I’d get the Coast Guard to escort him to Great Debates.

You’re describing Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah, by Richard Bach. An old favorite of mine.

Personally, I’d find out what he had to say. Then see if I agreed with it or not. And then I’d be skeptical as to whether his path to enlightenment was navigable by anyone else.

But I’d be up for the walking on water courses, if I didn’t live in Arizona.

I’d wait until I see the good stuff. You know – swords beaten to plowshares (nuclear missles converted to fuel for nuclear plants?), nations will learn war no more, lambs lying down with wolves, etc.

Miracles don’t make a messiah. Results do.

So, a man walks on water? Big deal. That’s no proof of messiahship (is that a word?). It’s proof that someone figured out how to walk on water.

(N.B. This is the Jewish POV. If you’re a Christian, YMMV).

Zev Steinhardt

You may want to check out Eli by Bill Myers. It is about this very subject, in fictional form, o’course.

what would happen if a messiah appeared? Well i guess me and all my athiest buddies would be shit out of luck.

I assume if there was a (2nd?) coming, the last place *(s)*he’d show up would be off the coast of Massachusetts…unless the first miracle planned would be blessing the RedSox so they’d win their 1st World Championship.
If the messiah was really ambitious, you’d 1st see him in Jerusalem.
If the messiah was truly compassionate, he’d 1st appear somewhere in the 3rd world.
If the messiah was a bleeding heart, his 1st stop would be Joliet.
If the messiah was a capitalist, he’d sign a joint partnership with Miss Cleo.
If the messiah was out for maximum exposure, he’d come on the O’Reilly Factor, but if the hardballs scared him, he’d call on Larry King.
If the messiah had a sense of humor, he’d show up 1st in Berkley.
or if just coming down to punish us, he’d first show up at an ABA convention.

Well Mr.Visible I lived in AZ while I was a grad student. Loved every minute of it. I suppose we can take this even to Lake Powell or Havasue…Illusions is an old favorite of mine as well. I try to pick it up once a year and see what I can learn from it again…

As for everyone else. Massachusetts was just an example. and for those aetheistst out there don’t worry, who say this guy has be religious. He or she may just show us a way to live that reminds us of the way we should treat each other, I think alot of the people who practice most of the worlds major religions forget how to treat fellow humans…

It would be very interesting non-the-less if someone like that appeared…I’d sit a while and listen and see what they have to say…or just try to my best to understand…

I’m continually amazed at how few people know and understand Clarke’s Law.

In other words, what Zev said. Walking on water is a parlor trick.

Hmm, sort of like Kurt Vonnegut (and others) does for me. Of course, I don’t flock to him (or them). :smiley: