Was I out of line here?

The BBQ Pit
1

A couple of months ago I saw Minority Report at my local multiplex cinema. Before the movie there was the customary show of trailers and the trailer for Road To Perdition came on. Now, I was mildly interested until I noticed that it was directed by Sam Mendes, the (IMO) genuis behind American Beauty which is a movie which (and you may laugh) changed the way I view the world and the people in it. Even though the guy has only made one movie, I am a fan of his work. If I ever met the guy I’d probably tell him how much of an impact his work has made on my life thus far. He certainly wouldn’t be paying for his drinks that night. As such, as soon as I knew he directed Road to Perdition I set my heart on seeing it the day it came out.
So, on the first day it is released I go to my local multiplex to see the first showing. I went with my dad. I sit down and after the trailers the movie begins.

The credits roll, Tom Hanks, Paul Newman, Jude Law… Then it happens. One row back from me.

“Who’s Jude Law?”
“He’s an actor”
“I know that. Has he been in anything I would have seen?”
I turn round and there’s this old married couple behind me. They are the one’s who are making the noise. No biggie, it’s only the opening credits. At this moment I am not in the least bit annoyed. However, it served as a chilling portent for things to come.

They talked all the way through then entire fucking movie. The bitch even had a bag of sweets in a crunchy bag which she kept dipping into during the brief intervals where her mouth wasn’t otherwise occupied with talking.

A few other gems were

“Ooh, that looks just like cousin John”

“Cars like those (The cars in the movie are authentic to the time peroid, 1931) would be worth a fortune these days.”

“Is that Jude Law there?”

“Is that the little boy driving the car?” (when it couldn’t possibly be anyone else - you’ll see what I mean when you see the movie).

“I’m sure I’ve got a cold coming on”

And quite a few other pointless meanderings that had absolutely nothing to do with the plot of the film

There were also a lot of 'Who’s that?‘s’ and ‘Whadiddysay’s?’ as well.

There was also a lot of background babble which was clearly audible but I was unable to make out the words.

Now, I shushed them quite loudly about 20 minutes from the end. The old man turned nasty and called me a fucking idiot. I responded by telling them that they could expect nothing less if they insisted on chit chatting through the entire movie.

The woman then came forward and said rather angrily that she was ‘a bit deaf’ and had trouble following the story.

I responded by asking her why she was even there if she didn’t have a hope of understanding the movie and I suggested she might like to wait until the video came out.

My dad hurriedly assured her that everything was ok and she sat back down.

Now, given that she was a bit deaf I have wondered as to whether or not I was out of line in shushing the pair of them. I had guessed she was probably hard of hearing before doing the shushing. Perhaps I should have cut some slack.

Then I thought, no. I live with my parents and my grandmother who is also hard of hearing. I would never dream of bring my gran along to the movies because she’d keep asking what was going on and our conversation would annoy the piss out of those around us.

Secondly a significant proportion of what this old woman said could never have arisen from any difficulty in understanding the film due to her disability. Stuff like “Ooh, that looks just like cousin John” for instance. Would she have kept that to herself if her hearing was more acute? No. She was just being inconsiderate. Who gives a fuck if one of the characters looks like her cousin? Certainly not me at any rate, and certainly none of the other patrons who had paid to watch the movie as opposed to listening to her inanities.

I still feel a little bad, however. Was I wrong to shush them?

2

I don’t think so. Next time, get the manager.

Although with the Dolby Surround Sound, it’s a wonder I don’t leave the theater deaf, as high as they turn that up sometimes.

Did they ever shut up?

3

Yeah, right after I shushed them :slight_smile: Unfortunately the movie was already ruined for me by then so I’ve got to see it again now.

4

The only thing you did wrong was waiting so long to say something to them. They were being inexcusably rude, and I’m sure they were bothering other people besides you. The thing to do would have been, as ivylass said, to get the manager to speak to them and remove them from the theater if necessary.

5

Another vote for manager.

6

Being a bit deaf has nothing to do with it. If it did, you would have heard only one voice, as the deaf person could still have politely whispered and only her spouse would have need of responding in a louder voice. Also, I’m not sure how deafness factors into conversation unrelated to understanding the movie. Daftness, I daresay.

I’m sorry that you were made to feel guilt by the woman’s shrewd response. Ask people to be quiet early on or change your seat, and only give people one strike before fetching the manager. It’s not so much the cost of the movie, but the very precious time I and/or my date have set aside to enjoy it.

7

No no no, you complain loudly to the manager and you get free tickets.

:slight_smile:

8

I always take a hungry badger along with me to the movies for situations like this.

9

Out of line? Hell no. They deserved worse. People think they they own the place…and you gave them plenty of chances to shush. In fact, they were the ones out of line, especially what with the old man swearing at you like that, etc. Right on.

10

I think you did right Gomez. There’s no reason to feel guilty that the woman is hard of hearing. While that’s certainly a shame, it is not an excuse to behave in a way that is obviously innapropriate for a movie theater. I would have probably spoken up sooner.

11

What Joe said. You were kinder than I would have been.

People that are suggesting getting the manager: explain please?
Would you make no attempt to quiet them yourself? Getting the manager requires leaving the movie and finding him, then bringing him into the movie, disrupting many people to point out where the couple is sitting, just so he can say something to them. Seems like overkill to me. I’d just tell them to shut up, or maybe move farther away from them.

12

After some dumbass talks through the whole movie, this is the conversation I want to see take place after he goes out to the lobby.

Clerk: Excuse me, sir?
Annoying Idiot: Yes?
Clerk: You talked through the whole movie. You said a grand total of 1,032 words.
Annoying Idiot: So?
Clerk: We have an Annoyance Charge for people who talk during movies. The formula is 1.50 per word per hour of the movie per person(=1.50(# of words times # of hours times # of people)). The movie you saw was “Lord of the Rings”, which is three hours long. There were 65 people in the theatre. 1,032 times 3 blah blah blah times 1.5 carry the 3 blah blah blah, okay sir, you owe us $301,860. Will you pay by check, cash or credit?

We can only hope.

13

If the woman truely was hard of hearing, most theaters now have wireless headsets for the hearing impared that have amplified volume.
Being a cinephile like I am, I don’t think you were out of line at all. You paid just as much as them, but are getting a diminished product due to thier nonstop rambling.

14

Skippman is right. Theaters now carry assistance devices for the hard of hearing. A so-called “hearing problem” is no excuse for disrupting others enjoyment of the film. I always cringe when a group of old ladies sits near me in the theater. They’re more annoying than rowdy teenagers!

15

Gomez, you did nothing wrong. If you were distubed by them, others undoubtedly were, too. Seriously, go tell the manager or another employee. I did this recently when a group of yahoos were talking during Signs. The last straw was when one of them had a cell phone conversation during the movie. The manager kicked them out of the theater.

Debaser, it is extra trouble to find the manager, but I find it more effective than repeated shushing. For one thing, it humilates the rude moviegoers, thus hopefully teaching them a lesson.

Being hard of hearing is no excuse for being a jerk. My mother is deaf. She watches sub-titled movies in the theater, but otherwise she waits until she can watch the closed-captioned video.

16

You definitely weren’t out of line. I agree with Geobabe - you should have "shshhhhhhhh"ed them a lot sooner. I have no tolerance for talking at the theater and I have "shshhhhhhhh"ed people 30 seconds into the movie.

I’ve never gone to a manager, but if I ever do, I’ll ask for my money back. I hate leaving the theater during the movie.

17

You weren’t out of line, and I always have a hard time deciding when it’s time to confront people like that. I’ve had some success with first politely asking them to be quite. (Actually, I usually turn around and glare, because sometimes they just don’t think.) The times that hasn’t worked I’ve joined in the conversation. Last time one person was making comments like, “that was scary” or “wow that was cool,” so I started saying things like, “yeah that was” or what ever. If they asked a question, I’d answer it. They did finally shut up.

YMMV :slight_smile:

PC

18

Debaser, people who talk during movies are frequently too rude to respond to a shushing by another patron–look at the example in the OP. The man responded by getting angry instead of being apologetic that he’d been rude. I agree with those who say shush once, then get the manager. He or she has the authority to actually do something about the situation.

19

I used to confront them, get the manager, etc, but it caused too much misery. Now I just get up and move. I try and make sure they can see me sit back down several rows away, in the hopes that will hammer it home.

[sub]This of course depends on there not being a big crowd, but I avoid crowded showtimes like the plague. I don’t have a problem with concerts, the subway, sporting events, etc, but being in a crowded theater freaks me out for some reason.[/sub]

20

[crowded theatre hijack] I know exactly what you mean, Dooku. I am actually a claustrophobe, so I avoid all crowded areas, but theatres have a special kind of freakiness for me, too. Maybe because of the darkness, maybe because you can get kinda trapped in your seat if it’s too crowded.[/cth]

As for the OP, yeah, what everyone else has said. I’m not much for confrontation, so I would probably just move, but nobody has the right to ruin a movie/event for another member of the ticket-buying public. It’s just sheer thoughtlessness, which seems to be epidemic in North America today.