Wench Auction Cancelled!

So much to comment on here…

What are they going to do with the remaining wenches? Will they be remaindered? Or maybe a fire sale?

Promoted from Auctioned Wench to Featured Pirate. Well, I guess that’s progress…or something.

I’ve been to Disney since 1997, and I honestly don’t recall the switch from Pirate Lust to Pirate Gluttony. I need to pay closer attention to theme park rides.

“Boy Scouts of the Caribbean” would make for an interesting ride (“Awesome! Educational! Boring!”). We could see them studying up for merit badges, ineptly starting fires, and wreaking havoc as they practice for their Totin’ Chips.

I’ll bid 2 barrels of rum for the redhead.

“Arghhhh, Ms Jane lass, congratulations on your successful transition.”

Actually, the changes are more radical than they are admitting. Here is a small bit of bootleg footage of the updated ride.

Lol on that clip.

This is such a stupid, unneeded and baffling move that I still don’t see why they’re doing it. Has anybody even complained over that ride? I’m not one to hold on to the past and pull the “never change it because it’s old!”, and (dirty secret time) I don’t particularly like the ride anyway, but this change accomplishes absolutely nothing.

Frankly, the worst part is that they’re going to have to close the ride for a bit to change it, which will make my Haunted Mansion line even longer

Good News ! No horrors in the future Haunted Mansion, just silent respectful participation listening to professional ethicists ( journalists who like the sound of their own voices ) vivaciously instructing on what you should think on any subject on earth.

This isn’t about a realistic portrayal of Piracy. This is about the ongoing nature of the ride for newcomer kids. I see no real problem with the idea, really. But then, I’ve never been to Disneyland, so have no nostalgic attachment.

Then why not continue whoring the ride out to the movies? I can only speak to Disneyworld’s version, but other than a small nod in the beginning, and having Jack sparrow show up here and there, there isn’t much of a coherent story in that ride anyway. If you wanted to change the ride to appeal to first-timers, then why not just gut the scene entirely and put the Pirate council, or another mermaid, or something from the movies?

At least that change would make sense.

I agree with this.

Look, if you’re coming to the Pirates of the Caribbean ride in order to get the low down on pirate culture for your history class dissertation, you’re doing it wrong.

I went on the ride when I was about 12 years old and it was one of the favorite things I did on that California vacation. Well, that and visiting the beach with the half naked girls everywhere.

I think the mood and the style of the ride are what makes it what it is. They can play around with the PCness of it and probably should as it’s a ride for kids. So long as you’re riding a little boat through a dark cave with spooky animatronic pirates and with gun powder going off, it will still be something kids will enjoy and remember.

Ok yeah, I too am curious why not just go all the way and make it about the movie. My guess is probably money, though. these changes ar eprobably cheaper than remaking the whole thing into a Jack sparrow spectacular.

Its not the first PC change to PotC. Originally, there was a scene with a couple pirates chasing ladies…and one lady chasing a pirate…that was removed. I know our delicate sensibilities won’t tolerate such tomfoolery today.

[PC Principal] They need to get rid of the guns. Guns are bad Bro and make impressionable children think they are toys to take to school and shoot the other kids with. When will Disney take responsibility for corrupting our youth? [PC Principal]

Arrr, you can have me sister for one. She’s a virgin, and her children aren’t home.

Go ahead and take the guns away, but not the cannons!

Up until they replace all the flintlock pistols with walkie-talkies.

Nothing says, “Happiest Place on Earth!” like selling women into sexual slavery. Dang those humorless feminists for spoiling the fun.

It kinda used to be.

I, for one, support the right of wenches to earn a living. I can’t see how closing down one of their career paths will help things at all.

Really? I always got the idea it was more akin to Treasure Island, which is also a storybook bastardisation of real Piratical endeavours.

I guess it depends on whether you consider the Barbary Corsairs to be “pirates”. They did raid entire coastal cities and take and sell slaves. Caribbean independent pirates in the golden age of piracy, not as much (although it may have happened a couple of times, I dunno.)