… and I am both thrilled and terrified. We already have a great 22 mo son and we just found out yesterday that our expected February delivery is going to be a double shot. It’s been almost 24 hours and I’m still reeling. So many questions are going through my head and I can’t focus on work. I’m just sitting here staring blankly at the screen.
Practically, I’m the sole earner in our family but we started a small home business last year that is slowly growing and starting to provide a trickle of income. We need that money and I want the business to succeed but I don’t know how we’re going to continue it while managing two newborns and a then 28 mo. I also have a couple side projects that I need to get rolling that may be able to provide some income. How the hell am I going to afford all this?
We’ve been looking to replace our aging Civic soon and I’ve been considering station wagons and such. Nope, straight on to the minivan. I started looking around last night.
We’re fortunate to have family close by that we can count on and I know we’re going to need the help.
Most of all, I am scared for the health of my wife and the babies. I felt some of that with the first pregnancy, but I was able to look at it reasonably and was always confident of a good outcome. Now I’m just terrified.
I feel like I can’t tell anyone at work yet but at the same time I feel like I want to just lay it all out. I’m working hard for a promotion in the spring and I’m simultaneously super-motivated to work hard for the new position (and the raise of course), I feel like I just have zero interest in my work at the moment. I feel like I ought to be home with my wife, preparing, planning, but I can’t jeopardize my job and I’m supposed to be transferring to a new project in the next few weeks.
You never know exactly how life is going to play out, but I feel like the foggy path in front of my just took a huge swing off to one side. This post is a mess and I don’t even know what I’m writing any more…
Second, the emotions of it all are still flying through you and you need to give yourself some time to re-find your center, but you will. (Enjoy the rush!)
Minivans are cars…they’ll adapt to you. You’re only human to worry about your wife, but she’ll be fine (really). Right now the task at hand is work and you’re a 110 appliance plugged into a 220 outlet. See if you can channel that energy w/o getting washed away by it.
You may find you are more creative idea wise today than head-down grind out the work wise. Use that, write them down. And above all, make it through the day.
Okay, sorry, but this is sort of pertinent, and sort of hijacky- I just found out we’re having twins, too. About and hour ago. We have two boys already.
I’m the father of twins (now 10 yrs old) and a thirteen year old. All girls. It’s a lot of work, but you get through it. It gets easier, too.
Good thing there’s family nearby. Use them!
One of the things that helped us along was joining the local twins club. You can get some great advice and support through them. They brought us hot meals when the twins were infants, for instance.
Congratulations though. And as for the money worries, if you were planning on, say, three kids in all then you’re getting two for the price of one. Well, maybe one and a half.
Sell the naming rights on the Dope’s Marketplace! Cecil and Ed? Cecelia and Edwina?
Keep us up to date. We’ll be pulling for you. I hope everything goes well with the pregnancy. How does the young one feel about it all?
Look up your local Mother’s of Multiples Society. They hold a couple of knock down drag-out awesome garage sales each year. Lots of clothes that haven’t been worn yet, doubles strollers, two-fer high-chairs, etc.
One of my friends’ daughter has 4 children: two sets of fraternal twins. I think they’re 4 years apart. Challenging, but fun (and I’m sure it’s frustrating sometimes, too, but that comes with the territory, regardless of how many kids you have).
Congratulations! And speaking as a twin, I’m so sorry.
My older brother had just turned two when my mother got pregnant with my brother and me. And they didn’t even know she was having twins 'til we were born. At least you have notice!
Thank you all for the encouragement and words of support. We don’t know the sexes yet. We were planning to keep it a surprise as we did with our son, but practicality may win out in this case. My wife is 12 weeks along, so we have about two months before we’d find out anyway.
Thanks for the tips on the twin support groups, I’ll definitely check that out.
I’ve settled down a bit now but it’s still super difficult to focus on work. That I know how extra important it is to succeed at my job just makes the frustration of not being able to concentrate worse.
