Another accidental baby here. It was a rough time in my parent’s marriage and they had originally planned for my sister to be an only child. My mom even considered aborting me, but she had a talk with her sister and the sister convinced her to keep me (thanks, Auntie) and who knows, maybe it would be a boy this time. I arrived sans penis.
I was planned, but my wife was informed early and often by her mother that she was an accident, the result of the condom breaking. She believes she was never told she was a ‘happy accident’ either.
She’s still rather hurt by the way it was presented all her life.
Yes, and no. My parents wanted kids, but apparently my mother had been told she wouldn’t be able to have any without a lot of difficulty, so when she did get pregnant, they were happy, but weren’t planning for something they thought wouldn’t happen without medical intervention. As it turned out, it only happened once, so my sibling is another yes, and no, due to adoption.
I’ve always assumed I was an accident, since my mom was quite young. But I think it wasn’t an entirely unexpected accident- they knew the possibility and figured what happened happened.
My dad wanted to wait seven years after they were married to have kids, but one night they weren’t as vigilant with the birth control as they could have been. Afterwards, my dad told my mom he was “worried”. 9 months later, I was born. My parents loved me very much and I’m sure I was very much wanted by the time I was born.
I was unwanted by my mother who was among the pioneering generation of professional working women due to WWII and of the lesser desired sex by my father. I knew that my father had hoped for a boy very early in my life, but it wasn’t until my mother was dying that I asked her if she hadn’t wanted children.
Ultimately not a sad story. Just took us a while to get all the rough edges smoothed out and we said our final goodbyes with love.
Incidently, the study of birth order and personality is an interesting one and worth its own thread.
'47, '50, '51 and- me, 1960. Doc told my mom pregnancy wasn’t going to happen after their third because of scarring or something. I got this info out of her when I was thirty-four and she’d had some wine. I still contend I was a blessing, not an accident. I was definitely not as spoiled as any of the “only child” kids I knew.
Yup. My mother was ‘infertile’ and my Dad didn’t want any more kids.
As far as I’m concerned, my daughter’s conception was an accident, but her birth was not.
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You’re twelve years old? And your Dad was married to one woman, planning kids with her, and doing exactly the same with another woman - with the same OB/GYN?
My brother and I were both planned. I took a little while to happen, but my brother was near-instant (well, except for the gestating bit, which took about 42 weeks).
You’re twelve years old? And your Dad was married to one woman, planning kids with her, and doing exactly the same with another woman - with the same OB/GYN?
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I read that as the stepmother had children from a previous relationship twelve years prior.
I have shared this story before, but why not. My father seduced my mother. He was married, and her teacher - it was high school. She was either just underage or just above the age of majority, I’ve never gotten a straight answer. I don’t know how soon she knew she was pregnant, but she was away at hostel (dormitory) and was able to hide it from her sister, my aunt, by saying the lady at the dorm cooked oil-laden food.
When I was born, my dad disowned me. I don’t know the details, but I do know he wasn’t going to mess up his marriage for something so paltry as a girl child.
Thankfully my mother’s elder sister ended up adopting me.
It’s a tough thing to deal with. My father, who I never met, officially deserted my mother and my siblings when I was two, but had been mostly absent long before that. He never looked back and never contacted any of his children, although my brother went to see him at some point as an adult. For the most part, it doesn’t matter to me other than wondering why someone would abandon his children. I know it hurt my sibs deeply. When my brother told me that he died, I just shrugged.
I’m stunned the opportunity even arose, in your mom’s case… my husband wouldn’t have been allowed in the same ZIP code if that had gone on!!
I’d say I’m not so much an “accident”, as the normal course of events for a family where birth control wasn’t being used. We kids were spaced about 2 years apart, and I’m the youngest of 4 (3 older brothers).
From what I understand, there was a miscarriage after me, and no more pregnancies that I know of. I don’t know if that was by design or not - Mom was only 30 when I was born so there was plenty of time for younger siblings to put in an appearance.
I’m pretty sure I was planned and certainly wanted. I love looking at photos of myself and my family when I was a baby. It’s clear how much I was loved.