What are your biggest restaurant complaints?

The BBQ Pit
301

[QUOTE=SnakesCatLady]
“Poodle patty” is the term we used to use for a hamburger served without a bun - old ladies would order them for their dogs back in pre-Adkins days.

She wanted a cheese sandwich, which is NOT on the menu and they get upset if you ask for one. However, if you order a plain cheeseburger with the meat on the side, they seem to be able to do that.
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Why would someone who wants a cheese sandwich go to McDonalds for one? Does she order Coq au vin there too?

My peeve is when restaurants take a standard item and fuss around with it to make it their own. Cole slaw is a big one for me. It is a cabbage salad and it always used to come in two forms - shredded cabbage and carrots either in a mayonaise based dressing or a vinegary dressing. Now it seems every restaurant has their own version, incorporating apple slices, green and red pepper, pimento, cilantro, etc., etc. Just let a standard be a standard. Leave it alone. Potato salad can be the same way.

If I order tomato-mozarella salad, I expect ripe red tomatoes, fresh mozzarella, maybe some basil leaves, olive oil and balsamic vinegar. I don’t want fried green tomatoes, reduced-moisture, part-skim shredded mozarella, and a bunch of waitresses surrounding the table singing “Hey Mickey, you’re so fine/ you’re so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey, hey Mickey”

302

[QUOTE=devilsknew]
I saw the end of Alton Brown’s cheese show last night and he said that most, if not all lactose is consumed by bacterial processes in a final cheese and that cheese is perfectly acceptable for the lactose intolerent. If that applies to American cheese or cheese products, I have no idea
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Hmmmm…all I know is that about five or six years ago I started having “intestinal distress” if I ate more than a few ounces of cheese or ice cream at a sitting. A couple of slices of cheese on a sandwich was no problem, but more than that and I would be assured of spending a fair amount of time catching up on my reading while sitting in a small room. It took a while to make the connection, since up until then I could eat an 8-oz block of cheddar with no problem.

Maybe properly aged cheese (I mostly eat Kraft or store-brand cheddar, but lately I’ve been treating myself with an occasional trip through the Whole Foods cheese department) wouldn’t be a problem, but I haven’t tried to experiment recently.

303

[QUOTE=elmwood]
Let’s say I’ve got the afternoon off. I head to a restaurant by myself, hoping to get a decent late lunch and possibly read part of a newspaper or book I may be working my way through. Even though it’s 2:00 PM, and the place is nearly empty, I’ll still occasionally find myself seated at a tiny table for two next to the kitchen or the bathroom. It’s not like I’m asking for a larger table in a decent location during dinner rush. The place is empty - why seat me at the smallest, worst table in the house?
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This reminds me: I used to work in a restaurant that had a small number of (non-smoking) booths, the remainder of the seats being at tables of varying size. One of the management’s house rules was to avoid seating single diners in the booths, particularly during the dinner rush, in order to keep them available for larger groups. If a customer insisted, we were required to get an OK from the on-duty manager before allowing someone dining alone to sit there, or we’d get bitched at.

One afternoon a guy (whom I recognized as a regular customer, who always came in alone) walked in shortly after we opened at 4:00 p.m. When I tried to seat him at a small table, he asked to sit at a booth instead, so I said “that should be fine… let me make sure really quick with my manager” (who was sitting a few feet away in a back booth).

The guy flew into a rage, ran over and began screaming at my manager that he couldn’t believe they’d give him crap about sitting alone in a booth when the entire restaurant was empty, then (before my boss could tell him that it was fine for him to sit in a booth, which is what he would’ve said anyway) turned and stormed out of the restaurant.

We later learned that he’d contacted the restaurant owner, who in turn dressed down my manager and told him “never, ever tell a customer he can’t sit wherever he wants.” Thankfully I was exempt from the diatribe, since I had simply been following one of their stupid rules, of which there were many— frequently completely contradictory, nonsensical, and subject to change without warning on the whim of whoever was in charge that night.

I can’t count the times I’d apologetically tell a customer we unfortunately wouldn’t be able to accommodate some special request (interdictions we were continually drilled on by management, usually in order to save a few pennies on food costs) only to have the boss greet the table warmly and say “aw, I guess we can go ahead and do that for you guys!” thereby casting me as the unyielding dickhead and himself as the genial, customer-pleasing facilitator.

Christ almighty, how I fucking hated being a waiter.

304

[QUOTE=Diogenes the Cynic]
I just thought of something that actually does kind of bug me, but maybe it’s just me. I always find it kind of offputting when a server takes the orders without writing anything down. It makes me nervous. Even if they don’t make any mistakes it still seems like a high wire act. I would just feel more comfortable if they wrote it down. I don’t understand the point of that. Why unsettle the customers like that?
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I’m totally with you on this one. Am I supposed to be impressed? I’m not going to give you a bigger tip because you didn’t write it down. And, if you fuck up my order, I’m going to be extra-pissed because the problem could have easily been avoided by just WRITING DOWN THE ORDER. It’s lose-lose, so don’t bother.

305

[QUOTE=Lamar Mundane]
Why would someone who wants a cheese sandwich go to McDonalds for one? Does she order Coq au vin there too?

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If you read her original post on this (#288), it was a whole hockey team on a bus stopping at McD’s, of which poodle patty girl was a member.

Add me to the “Just write the order down” club. My other peeve - if I’m in your kid friendly restaurant with my 3 hellspawn, and I ask for extra napkins when we order, bring them with the drinks, and bring a lot. Like 20 or so. Believe me, we’ll all be happier later if you do so.

306

Fuck! You guys wait up a minute! I’ve got stuff to add but every time I finish reading a page, another new page has filled up!

307

[QUOTE=nashiitashii]
I’m pretty sure that it was because she ingested way more fat that she was used to. I go between periods of cooking stuff at home with pretty low levels of fat to occasionally buying high-fat meals that make me feel nasty with the occasional diarrhea attack. I never intentionally cut back the fat so much that I was getting less than 20g/day of fat, but I still had the occasional “OMG, too much fat!” nastiness to deal with. Then again, I had a six month period where I just wasn’t eating much at all* that my body is still readjusting from.

[sub]*Nope, not anorexic, just poor at the time. [/sub]
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I said I thought that was the reason, but was informed it was all in my head.

308

[QUOTE=Lamar Mundane]
Why would someone who wants a cheese sandwich go to McDonalds for one? Does she order Coq au vin there too?

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I so wish people would read.

She did not go to McDonalds for a cheese sandwich. She was riding (not driving) in a car with others and didn’t make her food preferences known. Instead of pitching a fit, she made do with what was available.

309

[QUOTE=Phase42]
? Nowadays, it’s always this godawful “spring mix”, which appears to be dandelion leaves and some purple stuff, along with a few other things I can’t identify. Half the time, you get more of this stuff on the plate than lettuce. Damn it, I want my salad made of crisp, fresh lettuce. I don’t care if its iceberg or romaine, I just want substantial, crisp chunks of lettuce that I can actually stick my fork into and deliver it to my mouth. Not these limp leaves of other … stuff … that become even more limp when doused with dressing and flatten themselves against the bottom of the plate when I try to stab them with my fork, forcing me to eat by scooping the stuff up, not skewering it.
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Well, although I also love nice crisp iceberg (with whaaaaay too much blue cheese dressing), I have to admit they are likely doing you a favor. Iceberg lettuce has nearly no nutritional value. That “spring mix” you despise is more likely to be loaded with anti-oxidants and vitamins.

310

I hate that the places around the campus where I work like to put sprouts on everything. Often even where sprouts are mentioned nowhere in the ingredients. If I manage to catch it in time, I ask, politely but very clearly, for no sprouts on my food, and 90% of the time I get sprouts. Then I hate it when the person goes, “Oops! Can I just take them off?” Sprouts spread their terrible taste to anything they touch, even for a second, and manage to get their horrible little tendrils everywhere, even from a seemingly cohesive dollop. But their looks seem to telegraph, “if you say no I’ll go snicker with my coworkers and talk shit about you on message boards for the rest of the week. Go on, try me.” So I meekly say that’s fine, and sadly eat my now disgusting meal. :frowning:

311

[QUOTE=LurkMeister]
Maybe properly aged cheese (I mostly eat Kraft or store-brand cheddar, but lately I’ve been treating myself with an occasional trip through the Whole Foods cheese department) wouldn’t be a problem, but I haven’t tried to experiment recently.
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Whether cheese is OK for lactose-intolerant people depends very much on the cheese. Velveeta is very high in lactose, and “processed American cheese food” can be, according to that chart. You probably are better off with a properly aged cheese than with Kraft (and it’s certainly going to taste better, unless you’re a freak like my dad, who, if you gave him a nice bit of Montgomery’s or some other good cheddar, would probably prefer Velveeta).

312

If we’re having dinner and we order a bottle of wine, please don’t constantly fill my glass to the brim. I thought the point of having the bottle on the table is so my party and I can pour for ourselves as needed.

313

So Alton Brown was actually wrong? Well, whaddya know?

He gave me the impressioon that Captain Lactose was defeated by cheese.

314

[QUOTE=devilsknew]
So Alton Brown was actually wrong? Well, whaddya know?

He gave me the impressioon that Captain Lactose was defeated by cheese.
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No, he was right. He said it was only aged cheeses that were low enough in lactose that most lactose-intolerant people can eat them fine. There will still be some in all cheeses, though, unless it’s very aged, like an extra-sharp cheddar, Parmesan, or Romano.

315

I prefer properly aged cheese, but at $7-$20 a pound my budget prefers Kraft when the stores have it on sale for $3 a pound. I only use Velveeta when melted with salsa to make sauce for tortilla chips. Although that chart explains why I’ve learned to severely ration my ice cream intake. (Oh, for the days when I could eat a whole pint of Ben & Jerry’s at one time.) Interestingly enough, I’ve started having a container of yogurt for breakfast with no apparent problem.

316

[QUOTE=bouv]
No, he was right. He said it was only aged cheeses that were low enough in lactose that most lactose-intolerant people can eat them fine. There will still be some in all cheeses, though, unless it’s very aged, like an extra-sharp cheddar, Parmesan, or Romano.
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Well, that’s not the impression Alton Brown gave me with his clever little Captain Lactose performance. Right now, I’ll bet that there are thousands of the Lactose Intolerant taking a creamy shit thanks to his skit.

317

Another one-

salad on a warm/hot (like fresh from the dishwasher) plate. Yuck-o.

I can accept not having a chilled plate at a mid-level or family type place, but a hot plate???

I don’t send it back, or anything, but it spoils a nice salad for me.
Oh- and super wet salads, the kind where water pools at the bottom.

That’s gross too.

318

[QUOTE=LurkMeister]
Interestingly enough, I’ve started having a container of yogurt for breakfast with no apparent problem.
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[continued hijack] I had a slow progression away from dairy. One day I could no longer consume milk/cream/ice cream (it was okay when a small amount was prepared in sauces, etc, but intolerable on its own or in coffee), but was okay with cheese (although it made me a bit sick) and absolutely fine with yogurt. Over time, I ate less cheese and it made me progressively more uncomfortable. Today, although I love cheese with all my heart, I cannot eat it because it makes me really uncomfortably sick.

But I still have yogurt in my smoothie every morning.

I am tempted to start a thread about this. It’s fascinating! [/hijack]

319

I was a host/waiter long ago and an incident still bothers me. I worked at Denny’s, 24 hour place. The restaurant had 3 sections. We were switching from overnight to morning shift. One section was closed and dark, one section was the overnight smoking section, there was still a couple stragglers sitting w/ their coffee. I was instructed to sit no more smokers in that section and that I should start sitting smokers in the daytime smoking section. So temporarily, I had two smoking sections and no non-smoking section. Party of 6 walks in, one is on Oxygen. I had to tell them that I had no non-smoking section now. Wow were they pissed. Threw a hissy and walked out. I still have no idea what I should have done in that situation. There was no way I was going to make them happy, I basically apologized and let them walk out. I’m sure they told that experience to everybody they knew. I felt horrible.

320

[QUOTE=SnakesCatLady]
I said I thought that was the reason, but was informed it was all in my head.
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Oh, I understand, but I figured that adding in my own opinion and experience that high-fat foods are not always well-digested (I’m sure we’re not the only ones) would help counteract the apparent “paintbrush the poster as being hysterical and imagining it” crap that had been cited earlier. :smiley:

My own peeve with restaurants: why on earth are most of the vegetables available in most restaurants in my area some form of potato/plantain or iceberg lettuce? Why is it when there’s something besides a starchy vegetable, it’s almost always horribly overcooked or contains zucchini or cauliflower, which are also bland and boring? Sometimes I want to go out and not feel like I’m being forced to eat bland, boring food. If I wanted bland, boring food, I could eat in the home of someone who was a bad cook for free. I’m not paying more just to have a bad food experience.

ETA: Cowgirl, yogurt has active cultures in it, which are very good at upping the efficiency of your digestive system. It’s good for all sorts of things, and there’s a reason why they now make yogurt-based products that are directly aimed at keeping you from getting periodic diarrhea or constipation. Gross, but effective.