I plow the snow, and use the tractor to move piles when it becomes too much for the truck to handle or other duties that require the tractor. My Wife does most of the snow shoveling.
My Wife does the laundry. I do most but not all the cooking.
I work from home, so I take the dogs for a short walk every day. My Wife does the long walks on the weekend. For those she often needs snowshoes (it’s brutal, I couldn’t do it).
I do all of the home repairs and manage our computers (I’m a programmer)
We are currently house hunting for when we retire. My Wife does 90% of that, makes sense, she is a property appraiser.
My Wife does the ‘big’ grocery trips. She buys all the basic consumables for the house (cleaners, tooth paste, etal).
I manage the finances, cook, do laundry, do any push-mowing (spousal unit has had 10 spinal surgeries and both knees replaced - he does NOT need to be mowing across slopes or in the ditches.) I also tend to be the one to keep track of vehicle maintenance and make appointments with our car guy. He’ll do absolutely anything I ask of him, but because of the aforementioned surgeries, I’m careful what I ask him to do.
On the other hand, when things need to be built, installed, or repaired, he does the work and I fetch and assist and generally do whatever is required to be useful. He deals with the dishes after supper unless I feel like doing it myself. And he’s the duty driver as my eyes are close to worthless when it’s dark, plus I hate to drive. When we’re on our boat, he’s captain and I’m crew - he’s much, much better afloat than I am.
He makes a larger chunk of the $$ and maintains the electronics. Oh, and does his own laundry and shops for things he wants to eat.
I do everything else:
Care of 24 animals
financial stuff
general groceries & supplies
home chores & maint (doing or scheduling)
vacation planning & set-up to be gone
All the minuscule day-to-day stuff that piles up if not attended to
After 40-odd years we’ve got a lot divvied up. I pay the bills (he won’t remember to). He does the taxes (math genius). He does the dishes and the trash/recycling. I shop and cook because I am so much pickier about food than he is. I shovel paths in the snow, he clears the driveway with the tractor. In fact he does all the tractor stuff, which is extensive. He fells, bucks, splits, and stacks the year’s firewood. We both keep the woodstove going. He fixes everything broken. I take care of the dogs and the livestock, and the gardens, and do the mending and darning of clothes.
Between us we get it all done.
Both of us hate to clean house so one of my most rewarding gifts to myself after a lifetime of doing a poor job at it, has been hiring a house cleaner for four hours a week. Bliss.
Finances
Home maintenance/repair
Yard/property maintenance
Vehicle maintenance
Barn chores in the morning
Opens/closes gate for me when I leave/arrive
Drives if we travel together
Main doer & planner of things
Me:
Cooking/meal planning
Cleaning
Dog feeding/medicating
Laundry
Barn chores in the evening
Opens/closes gate when we travel together
Chief assistant
And I never thought about it, but that’s kind of our split as well! Dogs are dealt with by me until the wee hours, then it becomes his problem.
Also I wish to say that he is a type-A workaholic, so I let him do the lion’s share because it makes him happy.
My wife controls the remote, because she loves to skip ads (we DVR everything) and goes for the weather. Plus, I work on a puzzle while watching TV, so I’d let the ads run.
I fix her computer when she messes it up, and tell her for the umpteenth time how to zip things and include them.
Most everything else we share. She enters payments in Quicken and I balance the checkbook, since we both firmly believe that each of us knows everything about our finances.
She calls repair people when necessary, I fix things when I can, which is usually.
It’s worked for almost 47 years.
I know this is not unusual, but I have been married three times (once divorced, once widowed, and now happily married again) for a total of more than 45 years and this has been the case throughout. It was never discussed…I just ended up doing it. I’m happy to do it as part of my marital obligations, but it’s a bit depressing when I remind myself that I will probably have to change this bed another 800+ times before I’m gone.
And identifier of smashed bugs. My wife will show me a kleenex with something she squooshed and ask “What is this?” My usual reply is “It would be easier to tell if it was in one piece.”
