What... Do I OWE you a cigarette? (rant)

The BBQ Pit
1

So I’m walking down the street toward work this morning, smoking, and as I’m passing a guy (not apparently homeless or anything, just a guy) he says, “hey man, can I bum a smoke?”

Now, normally I’m rather of the “us wicked and evil smokers must band together” mentality, and will generally spare one when asked.

This morning it happened the one in my mouth was the last of a pack – in fact had just been thinking to stop at the newsstand and pick up more.

So I say “sorry, last one” and keep going.

From behind me I hear “You’re going to fucking lie about a cigarette???”

So I turn around, and say “Hey, fuck you, I’m telling the truth, and even if I wasn’t … you think I automatically OWE you a cigarette if I’ve got one?”

Turn back around and head for the office again… But this stupid creep doesn’t even have the sense to shut up. He mouths off and says “I know you’re lying, asshole, so why don’t you just gimme a smoke?”

Yeah, right. Anyhow, I turned around AGAIN and he musta caught the look in my eye at that point. Lying is something I happen to have a thing about. I just don’t do it, and calling me a liar TWICE is a definite way to set me off.

Anyhow, he must have seen what I was thinking because he took off running…

That was about 6 hours ago and I’m STILL pissed off! Ugh.

2

Hey, buddy, can I get a cigaretter?

Kidding! I’ve had exactly the same experience, and it never fails to annoy. Jerks.

3

i just hate when people try to bum off of me. i have a neighbor that knocks on my door simply for a cigarette.

once he asked to bum one and said he was gonna take two… yeah, whatever. he normally buys me a pack every once in a while or gives me money. what set me off about it though was the fact that he gives it away to this girl. kinda like a “look, here’s a cig for you from me”. it just really irritated me. he was using my cigarettes to score brownie points with her.

4

My friend deals with it in a great way- she only gives people the cigarette that she is currently smoking. They ask and she sticks it out and offers it to them. Take it or leave it. Strange responses, but she simply says “Last one” and that normally shuts them up. If you say last one and are holding a lit one, normally people believe you.

Then 10 paces on you can light up a new one.

-Tcat

5

Good for you, I hate it when people did that to me when I smoked. You are just minding your business walking down the street and the last thing you want is to get harassed. On more then one occasion they left me alone after I threatened to put the cigarette out in their eye.

6

oh man, I thought this was going to be the other side of chula’s story :smiley:

7

There was a hilarious “What Do You Think” in the Onion about the price of cigarettes going up. One of the responses was (IIRC) “It doesn’t bother me, because as a social smoker I only smoke occasionally when I’ve been drinking. Got a cigaratte?”

If I were in this scenario, after being called a liar I would have said “OK, you got me. No, you can’t have one of my many, many delicious cigarettes.”

8

That’s not annoying. Annoying is when people do that to you and you don’t even smoke. Has happened to me on more than one occasion.

“Hey, can I bum a cig?”

“Sorry, I don’t smoke.”

“Tight-ass!”

9

My Dear Count (i.e. Dooku):

You know it actually occurred to me to say almost exactly that.

Unfortunately it occurred to me about 30 seconds too late to use as a “stunning riposte[sup]TM[/sup]”… Ain’t that always the way.

10

Don’t feel bad DrLizardo - my karmic punishment for taking your post was that I didn’t visit the board yesterday and missed out on all the Mod action I had been hoping for. Now all the threads are locked and I can’t respond with all the witty, scathing things I wanted to say.

11

Yeah, well, a nicotine fit is a horrible thing.

The one that got me was the guy that got mad at me because I wouldn’t cross the street to give him a smoke. (It was a street with heavy and dangerous traffic.)

12

I’m an extremely occasional social smoker. When I do smoke, I smoke clove or other specialty cigs. We’re talking upwards of $5 a pack, here. I have one or two close friends that I allow to ‘bum’ cigs off me, but everyone else is charged a quarter per.

I strongly suggest everyone start doing the same. Charge more in Canada.

13

25cents! Hah! “singles” should be a buck each here in NYC, considering the price of a pack.

14

Incidentally, the best line I ever heard when I tried to bum a smoke off someone (we smokers all do it once in awhile) was…

ME: Hey do happen to have an extra cigarette?

Them: Nope, my pack only came with 20.

They turned on their heel and left.

15

I was sitting at the bar with a friend one night when a couple of guys approach us and one tells me, “give me a smoke”.

I replied, “I don’t think so” due to the rude manner and intimidating posture of the guy.

So he really gets in my face and says, “Give me a smoke or we’ll kick your ass”. He’s about 6 feet tall, average size, and really starting to piss me off. I’m sitting on an elevated bar stool so we’re eye to eye (I’m only five foot ten). His friend was about the same size but despite this I was getting primed to take the guy out right then and there.

My friend steps in at this point, he gets down from the bar stool and looks down on the guy and with a big smile says “we’ll play with you guys…”

My friend is six foot six and probably weighed 300 pounds, a human being that you wouldn’t ever want to annoy. I had seen him pick up guys with one hand and toss them around like paper when he had to. He said he hated fighting but people (usually drunk ones) always wanted to test their luck with him. We had this in common as I am a small guy who drunken assholes always took for someone they could take their frustrations out on or in this case, intimidate.

These two guys fell all over themselves apologizing and I would not have been surprised if they had gotten on their knees and started begging for their lives.

I think that they thought they could intimidate the skinny white guy (they were native) and didn’t even think that the walking eclipse (also native) sitting next to me could have been one of my friends.

They left the building so fast they left skid and my friend made the comment about how he hated fucking racists of any kind.

16

Ditto. I was all set up to laugh at a parody thread.

17

Whoa. I guess there are benefits to living in the plumber’s crack of the country (south Louisiana).

18

I pay $8.00 a pack Canadian, which is $5.45 US, but as a starving student, that’s still a fair chunk of change, so I can be somewhat stingy in passing out free smokes. Friends get them no prob, because I know if I need a smoke they’ll return the favour (I refuse to bum smokes from random strangers. Just not kosher).

The only time that I’m ever bothered for smokes is when I’m outside at school, doing my best chimney impression I would have to say the two times out of every five, I’m usually offered money in return for a smoke (usually between 25 and 50 cents). In this situation I always refuse the money, and just give them a cig. I know what it’s like to go through a nic fit, and they did offer something in return, so their intentions are good, and they aren’t just mooching. Now, if the person is cute, this rule goes out the window, but what are you going to do?

Of course during exam week, I give smokes to any student who asks… Stress levels are high enough as it is. Anything that I can do to help, well why not? Besides, it’s good karma.

19

I pay $8.00 a pack Canadian, which is $5.45 US, but as a starving student, that’s still a fair chunk of change, so I can be somewhat stingy in passing out free smokes. Friends get them no prob, because I know if I need a smoke they’ll return the favour (I refuse to bum smokes from random strangers. Just not kosher).

The only time that I’m ever bothered for smokes is when I’m outside at school, doing my best chimney impression I would have to say the two times out of every five, I’m usually offered money in return for a smoke (usually between 25 and 50 cents). In this situation I always refuse the money, and just give them a cig. I know what it’s like to go through a nic fit, and they did offer something in return, so their intentions are good, and they aren’t just mooching. Now, if the person is cute, this rule goes out the window, but what are you going to do?

Of course during exam week, I give smokes to any student who asks… Stress levels are high enough as it is. Anything that I can do to help, well why not? Besides, it’s good karma.

20

I pay $8.00 a pack Canadian, which is $5.45 US, but as a starving student, that’s still a fair chunk of change, so I can be somewhat stingy in passing out free smokes. Friends get them no prob, because I know if I need a smoke they’ll return the favour (I refuse to bum smokes from random strangers. Just not kosher).

The only time that I’m ever bothered for smokes is when I’m outside at school, doing my best chimney impression I would have to say the two times out of every five, I’m usually offered money in return for a smoke (usually between 25 and 50 cents). In this situation I always refuse the money, and just give them a cig. I know what it’s like to go through a nic fit, and they did offer something in return, so their intentions are good, and they aren’t just mooching. Now, if the person is cute, this rule goes out the window, but what are you going to do?

Of course during exam week, I give smokes to any student who asks… Stress levels are high enough as it is. Anything that I can do to help, well why not? Besides, it’s good karma.