I kinda miss the masks and the socks. Sound tracks and color and credits are distracting. And what’s this with the movies being more than seven minutes?
Has anybody put together a compilation of old porn?
So far it’s just been girl/girl stuff, and yeah, we advertise in the paper and put up posters and stuff. You’ll find some more info here.
It was interesting to note that Andrew Blake got mentioned a few times while at the same time most people were saying that they really wanted some sort of plot. Night Trips I and II were primarily just vignettes with no setup at all other than they were all dreams that Tori Welles was having - there was precious little plot to the films other than that. Still, his (Blake’s) work is enjoyable - why? Production values. The scenes are well lit, take place in attractive surroundings, and have music that sets the mood without being intrusive or sterotypically “porn music” (the whacka whacka whacka guitar sound). It sounds as if the ideal would be a mixture of the two"
Put people in plausible situations where the sex doesn’t seem out of place or contrived (the sex isn’t there for sex sake, but as a logical extension of the scene), put the people in attractive locales, let the music set the mood but not overpower the scene, and record it on film (not video). The focus should be on the entire act, not just the genitals of the participants.
My ideal: Body Heat, with Kathleen Turner and William Hurt, but with more explicit sex (it was already pretty damn explicit).
I forgot something earlier, though it’s been (heh) touched on.
Screaming.
What is UP with that?? I have one video that I have to mute because the woman sounds like a collie in heat. I mean the guy’s barely touching her and she’s yipping at a high enough pitch to make my ears bleed. Drives. Me. Bonkers.
Moaning, good. Talking dirty, good. Some loud vocalizations, but if it’s fake- LEAVE IT OUT.
Oh, and while we’re on the subject- for god’s sake, can these people communicate? It doesn’t have to be all hearts-and-flowers, but a few well-placed compliments here and there are nice. What’s wrong with telling a woman she tastes delicious, or telling a guy that he feels good? I want some dialogue other than ‘suck it’ and ‘take those off.’ Hell, I’d settle for a nicely growled ‘come for me, baby.’
Boy, this is a popular thread, innit?
Most popular thread I’ve ever created! 
Oh and another thing, throw the clothes all over the place. Don’t fold them like you are a salesperson at Macy’s. Have the woman smack the guy’s face with her panties (I’ve seen that once. That was one the funniest movie moments I had). Ripping on the other hand…I don’t know.
It’s all already been said before…
[ul]
[li]less tattoos[/li][li]less skanky looking actors[/li][li]no more young (somewhat attractive) females banging old bastards[/li][li]humor can be good… two of my favorite porns: Pink Panties (Pink Panther rip off) and a Ron Jeremy blooper tape.[/li][li]NO MORE SPITTING ON GENITALS![/li][/ul]
Okay, let’s see…
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People who I can believe are in the role they are being cast. If he’s supposed to be a corporate CEO he’d damn better not be wearing a mullet or a half-dye job. If she’s supposed to be the corporate CEO’s secretary she should NOT have a double-digit number of tattoos and piercings.
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Yes, at least some sort of scenario, it does not need to be a plot, just gimme a sense of scene… even Penthouse letters at least tell you they were working late in the computer room and one of them offered to split a late night snack…
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Conversely: Poducers of “couples porn” or “plot porn”, please ditch the bogus New Agey BS dialogue. This is porno, not Sartre. Hint: comedy, romance, caper flick, “buddy” flick: good excuse to get it on on-screen. Existencial exploration, significant social commentary: bad excuse to get it on on-screen
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Hey, director, how about pulling back so we can see there are actually two (or 3, or 5) humans going at it, and where?
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And how about using the %^$# meter so you know how the light will fall on the faces (or other body parts)?
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Big agreement on having people step out of normal clothing. Which BTW includes that not every “college freshman” dresses like Brittney (if Brittney shopped at WalMart) .
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Gentlemen, ladies, if all of a sudden the drugstore clerk drags you into the back room, strips and starts to go down on you, you WILL be either hard or wet (as the case may be).
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Alright, look, once in a while I can see a facial. HOWEVER if what is going to happen is that at the moment of payoff he just dribbles it all over his shoes (or overshoots and hits something off camera) and has to shove it against her chin so anything gets on her… don’t even bother, OK?
(these two last could be summarized as : For Criminy’s sake, look like you’re enjoying it or get a real job!)
I agree with Tansu. More goths in porn would be nice.