Yesterday I crapped out my entire system by trying to install Ubuntu alongside Win 8.1. They got into a screaming bitch match and dragged my native Win 7 OS into the fray. When the dust settled, everything looked like the toy department at Target the day before Christmas. So I said fuck it and decided it was a perfect opportunity to really spiff up my system. So I took out the OEM 700 GB drive and tossed it in the closet. I replaced it with a big fat juicy 1.5 TB drive, and stuck a second 1.0 TB drive in the slave slot. Then I rolled up my sleeves and prepared myself for a weekend-long ordeal. The first thing I did was install Win 7 Ultimate on my new C:\ drive. My plan was to give Win 7 a quarter TB, Win 8 a quarter TB, and use the remaining single TB for junk, which I would mirror on the second drive. But after I installed 7, I went to shrink the volume, and Win 7 wanted HALF of the whole goddamned drive! What the hell was it thinking? I mean, I’m totally down with lebensraum and all that, but why on Earth would Windows decide that it needed or was entitled to .75 TB of drive space when there was absolutely nothing else on the drive? Is there any way I can beat the little bastard into submission after the fact? I wound up just giving it what it wanted, giving Win 8 a quarter TB as planned, and allocating the rest for my junk box. I know I can just extend the third ‘junk’ partition to the second drive, but I wanted fault tolerance. Not only do I not understand women or Windows, my weekend is a complete bust.
THAT is an excellent thread title.
Bastard Windows stole all your carriage returns too!
Maybe Windows wants your woman this weekend? 
"Windows seems wicked
when you’re unwanted"
[sung to the tune of the Doors-- “When You’re Strange”]
Wait… You installed Windows then repartitioned the hard drive?
I long ago decided that the moment Windows stops working, I buy a new computer. It’s just easier that way.