Well, I had nice stuff and people probably thought the same as you do, but it was all a farce, I was doing everything I could to hold onto it, including robbing Peter to pay Paul. By the time I realized the only way out was to sell, it was too late. If you seen the shithole I am living in now you would probably feel different.
I’m not a financial wizard by any stretch of the imagination and I kind of lived for the day. I didn’t really see how expensive kids would get as they got older, I didn’t see gas going to over five bucks a gallon or seven dollars for a gallon of milk or four bucks for a gallon of heating oil. I got caught not looking, my bad, I admit that, but if I had of stayed working it would not have made a bit of difference.
I admire you for sticking with this thread. That said, you are still living in the past. Yes, things might have been easier if you were still working but you can’t work. If not this accident then maybe something else might have happened to cause a financial crisis. You are acting like somebody who stakes his whole financial future on winning the lottery. Your chances of collecting money may be better than lottery odds but if you think that proving fraud will stop a company from appealing a decision you are wrong. Frankly, the only way I see you getting any money is by a settlement which will likely be a lot les than you anticipate.
You have an income. As I see it, you can choose to live on your income or you can make more money. If there is no way that you or your wife can make more than you get now then you will have to learn to live on your income. It can be done. People do it all the time. There are a lot of things that many consider necessities that can be done without. You need to make a budget and stick to it. Children are expensive, but they may need to be taught that they have to adjust their expectations now that your circumstances have changed. You live in Canada and have the luxury of health care. I assume that the children’s education is free. If you can afford rent, heat, electricity, food and water, then you can do without the rest.
Just, WOW! :eek:
I get that you’re not fishing for sympathy here, but FWIW, I’m sincerely sorry for your troubles.
I don’t really have anything to add or suggest, but I thought I would post to the thread in order to give it a ‘bump’.
I wish you better times, my friend.
I’m not a doctor, so take this with a grain of salt, but you sound like you might have some degree of PTSD. Usually that comes from an incident in which another person deliberately harms you physically, not from an accident, but it sounds like the original physical damage and the aftermath have become enmeshed in your mind till they’re part of the same incident.
One of the hallmarks of PTSD is that the triggering incident never moves into the past; in your mind, it’s constantly present, so it’s constantly enormous and all-controlling. There’s a theory that this could be because the brain, under huge stress, misfiles the incident under ‘present’ and can’t move it into the ‘memory’ file. So you keep trying to fight with it, long after that’s in any way productive. That’s what you’re doing.
I’ve got no personal experience here, so have another grain of salt, but I’ve heard of people having success treating PTSD with EMDR. It might be worth trying, and if it works for you, you might be able to find a way to move on rather than continuing to fight this one battle.
While the house itself may have been a good deal, the bottom line is that you could still not afford it.
I agree with the PTSD comments. You are stuck in a loop, and that may very well be what is causing you to not be able to accept and deal with your situation.