Here’s the story: last week my band played a gig for a local Chamber of Commerce. It was a grand re-opening for a small collections of shops and a good networking opportunity.
At the gig, a man approached me and complimented me on the music and asked if we could exchange business cards which we did.
The band business cards have my husband’s phone # on them. On Tuesday my husband got a phone call asking for me. He gave the person on the phone my phone #.
I get a call from the guy with whom I exchanged business cards. He thanked me for doing such a good job for the Chamber and asked if he could take me to breakfast or lunch.
(at this point I was completely caught off guard and wasn’t able to think clearly enough to ask questions or even consider turning down his offer of lunch)
So, I agreed to lunch we set a date and time (monday at 11:30) at a centrally located place.
Now I’ve got this huge question mark in my head, why does he want to have lunch with me? My husband was wondering if he’s trying to hit on my but this guy is easily old enough to be my father. I considered just bringing my husband along, he is, after all, my business partner, but I know it would be rude to ask to bring someone.
So now what? Should I keep the appointment even though I’m not sure why I’m going? Should I call and make up some excuse? Should I try and find out what he wants? Am I making way too much of this?
Take your husband along - don’t bother to ask, just take him.
This guy contacted you via your band and requested a change of business card. The reasonable assumption is that he wishes to discuss business and it would be sensible to take your business partner along.
And if he’s not legitimate then he will get the message that you’re not interested.
I’m assuming it’s business. You should go without your hubby, hear him out and then (mosy likely) say thank you and goodbye. You should, however, mention your husband in the first 30 seconds and approximately 10 times after that, in case this guy is just hot for you and really incompetent.
Holy crap I hadn’t even considered the multi-level marketing thing…that’s OK, while I may have trouble saying no in social situations I have great sales resistance and I abhor selling and recruiting which makes me the exactly wrong person to participate in MLM.
I’ll see my mom tonight and ask her what she thinks (she does lots of this type of networking thing). Geez, almost 45 years old and still asking mommy for advice :rolleyes: That’s me 45 going on 7 :wally
A few weeks ago, I was at the gym on the eliptical, and this nice young lady started up a conversation. She started asking the regular stuff, what I do for a living (software dev.) etc. I started asking her the same thing, and she mentioned some vague internet marketing thing. :dubious: After a few minutes it was obvious she was trying to sell me on Qwikstar.
And I thought a gym bunny was actually interested in me
I understand all the wariness. On the other hand, one guide to saving money says, “Never turn down any invitations to dinner.” There’s also the possibility that this guy is the music biz exec who will trigger your leap to stardom! Eh, maybe not, but what if Billie Holiday, Bob Dylan, or Stevie Ray Vaughn had turned down lunch with John Hammond?
What’s that line? Is that the border of wild-eyed fantasy?
Music biz? I doubt it. His business card indicates that he’s the former president of that particular Chamber of Commerce and he is currently working for a legal outfit that does pre-paid services.
I am much too cynical to imagine that he’s just so thrilled with our performance that he wants to say “thank you” by taking me to lunch though that’s what our initial conversation kind of sounded like. It was a paid gig (less than our usual rate but still a paid gig).
If he’s the former pres. of the CoC then he probably knows lots of people in town and would be a good person to have on our side and/or be able to use as a reference. I just got turned down flat for a gig at a restaurant/bar not two blocks from where the CoC shindig was held because the owner hadn’t heard of me and didn’t want to try anyone new :wally .
Of course if he’s a dirty old man and just asked me to lunch because I was wearing a low cut dress on that gig then, well, it’s going to be a mighty uncomfortable lunch.
Maybe I should just bring Mr. Jones along with an innocent “Oh, I didn’t think you’d mind”.
I realize that no one’s really following my pathetic little story here but I’m giving you an update anyway…
I met the guy for lunch as scheduled. He tried to sell me pre-paid legal services and sign me up as an agent to sell the stuff. Left me with a pile of information and a couple of DVDs to watch.
I’m wondering now how long until he makes the follow up call.
So, not exactly a good contact for me but I did manage to get some additional information about the chamber out of him which is good.
WTF… what an asshole for ambushing you with this. I understand you may have not wanted to burn any sort of bridge but… I would have walked out the moment he pulled out the brochure… well unless he was buying lunch… then I would have walked out my second desert.
Yup, that’s definitely in asshole territory. People with legitimate business have no problem stating it; when they dance around it (like job ads that never say exactly what type of position they’re advertising for), that’s a pretty good indicator that you won’t be interested.
As for your original question, which is now moot, I would have taken my husband and introduced him as my business partner.
I hadn’t considered how underhanded it was but he never mentioned his business or a business proposition or anything else on the phone. He just said I’d like to take you to breakfast or lunch and that statement came right on the heels of him complimenting my performance at the event and thanking me for doing such a good job inspite of the circumstances (outdoor event, bad weather). I assumed (I know, never assume) given the way he’d phrased the invite that it had something to do with my group. I was half expecting him to try and get me to do a freebie gig.
And yes, he bought lunch so I did get a free lunch out of it. I paid for the lunch by having to sit through his sales pitch but he picked up the actual check. I hope he tipped well.
