As much as it’s nice to get the whole Human Experience, I think lots of people are unable to experience - or perhaps understand - certain human emotions. I’ve known someone, for example, who didn’t find anything unpleasant about repetitive tasks. As long as there was a reason for his work, he didn’t mind the repetition - he never get bored.
For me, it’s envy. I mean, If I see someone with something I like, I’d say “Man, I want one of those,” but from there forwards my thoughts are focused on whether or not I can get me one of those, and how I could obtain one. The actual guy owning the Object of my Desire doesn’t figure in it at all - perhaps I’m too solipsistic to be envious .
I know for me, it’s moreso feelings I’ve never known. I am envious (ha!) of people who know contentment or euphoria. I’ve only felt either of those emotions when they were chemically created. Even at the birth of my child or my wedding or on vacation I don’t feel those things because I am so consumed with worry, fear and ‘what if’ that I can never say “I feel so great right now”.
But when I took oxycontin for my back injury…I felt that…in spades.
Right along with Envy, there’s Competition. I have CDD, Competitive Deficit Disorder. Remember as a kid liking games enough to play, but then was just turned off by people acting crazy when they didn’t win. It just seemed a stupid way to act, even to an 8 year old.
I loved playing baseball as a kid, but had to play softball since I’m a gal, and Little League was off limits then (I tried). I loved the game, loved to play, was a fast runner and great catcher, but never did get all the angry crap and Kill 'Em attitude. It just wasn’t in me.
That Me has developed more of a hard shell as an adult, and I will bristle and hold fast when pushed, but I still don’t get the need to WIN for ego’s sake. I love to do things well, and will work hard to be accomplished at what I do, but, competing to win over someone else, just don’t get the thrill.
Totally! I don’t even get an equivalent for my own geeky loves. Enjoyment and excitement, perhaps, but the intense visceral passion that sports fans emote when their team wins a tournament, game, or even scores a point, is something I will never understand. Thank goodness.
It’s strange that you say Thank Goodness. Who would wish against a feeling of Enjoyment and excitement? When the Bears made their run for the Superbowl last year, it was a blast, to feel the city united, all smiley and chit chatty on the bus, cheering with total strangers, singing the fight song…feeling so excited as the final seconds of the NFC championship game ticked away. It’s a fun, unifying feeling. Of course, you have to take the totally irrational lows of them losing the Superbowl and grown men actually crying and feeling crappy like a hangover for days. But generally, it’s a good time
With all due respect, that isn’t an emotion any more than “I just got asked out on a date”, or “I can’t believe someone ran into my car” is an emotion. When a team wins or loses, fans basically feel happiness, sadness, or maybe anger.
Ambition. I have none. And I know this isn’t an emotional state we usually associate with those who’ve run for Parliament, but it’s always been purely an activist thing for me, which is one of the reasons I’m glad I don’t have to do it this time.
But it goes beyond that. Everyone supposedly has goals in life they want to pursue for the thrill of achieving them. To the extent I have any goals, they fall into three categories: “necessary for sustaining life in the style to which I have become accustomed,” “duty,” and “this would be kind of neat, but I can take it or leave it.” The only thing that used to be a sheer ambition for me was to get married, and that’s since fallen into category 3.
I’ve felt anger of course, but I guess it’s a certain degree of anger that I can’t understand. The type of violent anger that leads you to want to break things or hurt people. Maybe I just live an easy life and have never run into any situation to make me that angry, but violent anger like that just completely mystifies me.
That gooshy squee feeling most girls are supposed to have when presented with a baby.
I make the appropriate noises when people show off their kids, but to be honest, I don’t really see the appeal. Babies pretty much look the same to me, at least until they’re old enough to develop a real personality, and I’m absolutely clueless about how to interact with them for more than a minute or so.
I keep waiting for the moment of epiphany when my biological clock kicks in and I get all ga-ga for babies, but I’m about to hit 30 with no sign of it yet… so I’m starting to think that maybe I’m just not cut out for the whole Mom Thing, aside from having the necessary equipment for the job.
Because when it’s attached to something you didn’t achieve yourself, but vicariously through some other guy doing something you’ll never do, I can’t see how that would get anyone so excitable.
I do have some feelings through vicarious means occasionally, I’m not completely without empathy, but never to a rabid sports fan degree.
I tend to get into trouble, mostly at work but with my mom too, because I don’t understand why people place emotional value on their ideas. It seems that to a lot of people all ideas have some sort of intrinsic value and they’re worthy of consideration and special because someone took the time and effort to concieve them, and me dismissing them because they’re not logically sound makes me a bitch. Apparently I’m supposed to offer praise for someone coming up with an idea that’s totally unworkable, and not point out the flaws in the plan. I don’t like this because a lot of ideas are simply stupid. I accept that not all of my ideas are genius, so why do so many other people seem to believe theirs are?
If you point out a flaw in my idea, I might be somewhat annoyed at myself for not thinking it through and wasting my time, but I’m not mad at you for pointing out something I overlooked.
I don’t understand worrying. Okay, that’s an action. For lack of a better way to describe it, I don’t understand the state of mind that goes along with worrying. Some combination of fear, doubt, anticipation and anxiety. If there’s a problem or a potential problem then either I can do something towards resolving it or I can’t. If I can fix it, there’s nothing to worry about. If I can’t, no amount of worrying will solve it.
Jealousy, particularly in the context of relationships. It boggles my mind that people could behave in such irrational and ridiculous ways motivated by jealousy, and that it seemingly makes people turn their partners into their property.
“Who were you with earlier??? Who was that on the phone??? I don’t want you going out on your own, I don’t know what you’ll get up to!”. Huh? Maybe it’s because I’ve only been in relationships that were based on mutual respect and trust but it’s never even occured to me to worry that my partner would be cheating on me or doing something he shouldn’t be when I’m not with him. Besides, it’s not like I can control him so what’s the point of trying?
Do you ever feel happy for someone else? Like people getting married, a friend getting a promotion. I haven’t achieved jack sh-- in my life. If I didn’t find enjoyment in other’s success I’d be a miserable son of a so and so.
Green alien chick to Capt. Kirk: “What is this thing you humans call . . . love?”
I don’t know if I really get greed or covetousness (sp?), at least for things like houses and big screen TVs. Not through any nobility of character, I’m just apathetic about having stuff. I think I’ve annoyed people at times when they show off their expensive you-name-its, expecting me to gasp with envy, and I just kind of shrug.
Even for stuff I do own, I don’t really think of it as “mine” somehow.
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