What fetishes don't work well in real life?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Let’s try to keep it slightly clean here. :slightly_smiling_face: Descriptions preferred, or a link to a wiki site. If you must post a pic, remember the 2 click rule. Let’s try keep it fun.

  1. Furries. Come on, everyone knew this was gonna make the list. No matter how much money you have, you will never be able to buy an outfit that makes you look like a real life sleek tiger. And your partner isn’t going to look the an over muscled bull with shiny horns. I would guess most furries never get past the baggy Halloween costume. Yes, you should use your imagination during sex, but this is a lot of imagination.

  2. This one I see on art boards a lot, probably because that is the only place it’s possible. I don’t even know what it’s called, but it reduces women to basically just a giant set of boobs, so giant that it often blocks out the woman’s whole body other than her head. A variant on this has the giant boobs, but the woman is either really fat or pregnant, I don’t know which. Fat like Jabba the Hutt fat. If you do a search on a place like DeviantArt for big boobs you will see more of these pics than you ever need to see.

  3. Giant sized women. Naked giant sized women, stomping on or eating a naked man. How could you even pretend at this realistically? Wear a pair of binoculars backwards while a woman in high heels stomps on you? Seems a little awkward. Again, DeviantArt is full of these images.

2

“Your kink is unrealistic” doesn’t seem like fun to me no matter how you put it. And then you start it off with furries? I don’t find that titillating myself, but “you can never be a real tiger” seems like the last resort of someone who’s no longer comfortable with the criticism they get when they say “furries are gross, aren’t they?”.

3

BDSM sounds nice but the participants tend to have large amounts of trauma, attachment issues and mental health issues which makes things difficult for actual relationships.

4

Not sure what your point is here. If you mean these are hard to physically realize in Real Life, I don’t think you’d get an argument. But I wonder if you realize that it’s only a minority of “furries” that even want to dress up as animals. Most people who identify as such may fantasize about that sort of thing – they write stories, draw images and comics, and the like. If you’re been on DeviantArt you’ve probably seen some of this.

I’m not a furry of any type myself, but I would imagine dressing up in a fur suit and trying to have sex would be a hot and sweaty undertaking. I have no doubt that there are people who do it, nevertheless. But it would require a lot of interest and dedication by all parties involved.

Similarly for people who fantasize about large breasts or other body parts, or who get into playing with size. It’s mostly a mind game, although I’;ve heard stories about people trying to simulate things. And it’s not just breasts – besides the obvious sexual parts, I’ve seen drawings on deviantart with inflated feet, lips, and other parts. Not to mention inflation like a balloon (Violet Beauregard from willy Wonka seems to be a Patron Saint of this sect) or extreme fatness or extreme hairiness. Or sex involving balloons or diapers or – well, there’s no limit to people’s imaginations and kinks. It’s a complete study in itself. Some of this is easier to realize in Real Life than others, but it’s all fantasy of one sort or another.

5

Then there are fetishes that work great in real life.

For special occasions my gf buys shoes from a crazy high end shoe store, where a tiny shoe with a wisp of a strap costs $300. The owner of the store has a foot fetish. Everyone who shops there knows about it. He loves his work and his customers seem to appreciate the care he takes in fitting shoes.

6

Are shoes with laces a form of bondage?

7

There are lots of fetishes are physically hard to realize in real life. I mean, vore/unbirth ain’t gonna happen (and glad I am about that one, because IMHO eww) but some people are into it.

That said, even with vore fantasies there are ways you can “play” enough to help someone get their rocks off*. In many respects sex is a mind game more than a physical one; sometimes you just need to do just enough to let the person’s imagination fill in the rest.

*or so I’ve learned from Dan Savage’s show

8

“Slightly clean” implies “mostly dirty”, right? :smiling_imp:

I’m thinking that a shoe fetish isn’t really workable. You either have to steal them, which is very hard to do because women generally walk around with their shoes on their feet, or you have to go out and buy them. Besides being expensive, you’d have to go into a women’s shoe store and buy them yourself. What guy buys women’s shoes without a woman with him? You’ve pretty much outed yourself to everyone around you.

9

I’ve met a coupe of furries and they don’t seem to have unrealistic ideas about the costuming. They’re just having fun, no different than the people at comic book and sci-fi conventions, or Halloween costume parties. I’m sure it could be considered a fetish for some, but that’s like calling X and glow sticks a fetish for ravers.

10

Or you could like, date someone whose fine with indulging your fetish.

And even if your understanding of the ins and outs of a shoe fetish were accurate, there are now literally thousands of online shoe stores. Or you could, you know, lie and say “My wife’s birthday is coming up. She’s a narrow size nine. And you’ll do a return if these don’t fit, right?” Or hey, maybe you’re lucky and you get off on people realizing you have a sexual motive for buying the shoes.

11

This dude in Japan was eventually caught, but he was breaking/entering then stealing shoes and replacing them with new, identical shoes.

12

I’ve never understood the idea that some people have where having a foot fetish means doing something untoward. That makes as much sense as assuming someone with a boob fetish needs to grab people’s boobs or steal bras.

13

I’ve always felt bad for people with impossible fetishes, like really wanting their partner to be a centaur. But I guess if you have a good imagination you can fill in the blanks.

14

Actually, my husband is as close to a centaur as humanly possible.

15

I’ve actually wondered at times if hypnosis would be useful for things like that. Erotic hypnosis is already a fetish (whether being hypnotized or doing the hypnotizing), so it seems like you might find someone willing to try.

Though, in this case, you’d think you’d be able to modify a horse costume, as long as you’re willing to have a threesome.

16

At least until we get the full-body feedback VR suits.

17

I’m gonna date a guy who likes to sniff around my shoes? NOT! LOL

18

That was the generic “you” and referring to the shoe fetishist, just in case it wasn’t clear. There are plenty of women who are fine with dating a shoe fetishist even if you’re incapable of imagining being one.

19

Yes, that’s the entire point, it’s right there in the title. If I wanted a deep discussion about fetishes I would have posted in a different category. I didn’t ask for any kind of argument, just for a fetish that is hard to accomplish in real life.

I’m also amused by people who feel the need to defend furries from a non existent attack on them (all I said was it was hard to do in real life) feel the need to loudly proclaim they are not furries.

I basically said this in the OP. I’m not looking for a deep discussion of why people have a mostly unworkable fetish, I don’t care what people do, whatever gets them off is ok with me.

Thanks for the un-birth example, vore, or a version of it, was mentioned in the OP.

Maybe, but you don’t need to be in any kind of relationship with someone to do BDSM. Ridiculously easy to find people who will play those games with you.

Does he have the pointy ears, with a lock of black hair falling down his fore head like Superman, and a giant golden nose ring? Cause if he does you know people are going to ask for pictures. :wink:

Thanks for this one, I’d never heard of it. I wonder how often it actually works and how often someone is just playing along.

Never let it be said that @BigT does not have a sense of humor. If I wrote LOL, I would LOL this post!

I don’t feel bad, they are doing stuff they find sexually fulfilling. I just think that the actual sex act has to fall far below expectations simply because you have to imagine all the time that you are banging a hot lioness but you open your eyes and it’s your girlfriend with a cat tail butt plug and a fake fur, kitty ear headband.

How do you know you haven’t? It’s a pretty popular sport.

20

My point was that “being a furry”, as most self-proclaimed “furries” define it, isn’t really hard at all. It doesn’t require dressing up as an animal.