What fraction of your sexual partners do you regret sleeping with?

Suggested by the currently-running thread on fathers being unduly possessive of their daughters.

Poll in a moment, but first let me say two things. I wrote what fraction rather than how many because I don’t feel like talking about total numbers of sexual partners. Obviously this will necessitate a good deal of imprecision, but so what?

Secondly, I am only speaking of persons you chose to be sexually intimate with, without being overpowered, coerced, pressured, intimidated, blackmailed, or roofied. If you want to talk about rape, please open another said. That said, if you chose to get drunk before having sex because you were trying to work up the nerve or because you believed the sex would be better if you did so, feel free to count that as voluntary.

Poll in a moment.If you don’t understand why the results will be private, you probably should talk to a professional about that.

My guess would be about 2%

You put “All But One” twice.

Yeah, one of those is supposed to be “only one of them.”

I voted more than half, by the way. If it were possible, I’d erase from history my interaction with almost every women I slept with between 1996 and 2003.

I voted for pudding, egad my twenties, sheesh ::looks around nervously:: I was a very bad boy then. But other than that time in my life and my ex-wife no regrets.


I was very sexual in high school and university. I had quite a number of partners. I don’t regret even one of them.

Some were good, some bad but I never regretted any of them.

Editted to change the word ‘slut’ in my post. While I don’t give it a negative connotation, some people get squidgy about that word.

I’m sure this isn’t your case, but it’s possible to regret a relationship because of the way you behaved, not the way the other person did.

I don’t regret sleeping with any of them. I regret marrying a couple, though.

0/2 = 0%

I regret some relationships but not the sex in them, except one (but really I had no business being in that relationship.)

Most of my regret from non-relationship sex stems from people being not good at it.

Hmm. Perhaps I should have been clearer in the OP. I was looking for cases in which you regret the entire interaction with the person. If the sex was good but the person was a shit to you otherwise (or the reverse), and on balance you would have been better off never meeting the person, it counts as regretting that sexual partner.

It doesn’t count if you were pressured? Being pressured doesn’t mean you didn’t choose. I’ve been strongly pressured a million times and still chose not to, so it can be done (not being self-righteous, I’ve given in because I was pressured enough times too). I can’t even separate the times I felt pressured from the times I didn’t. It’s a continuum.

I don’t regret either of the two biggest assholes I’ve dated, I guess, even if I did feel pressured at first. I regret the ones that have at least two of the following three properties: didn’t like them that much in the first place; short-term thing; wasn’t even good.

Then there are also a few I regret not sleeping with.

Oh, gosh, I would have been so much better off if I’d never met my psycho ex. But I still don’t regret it.

If you felt pressured to the extent that you submitted to having sex because otherwise you were going to be physically forced to, I’m counting that as rape, and thus outside the scope of this thread. But being pressured in the sense that if you didn’t agree to have sex the person was going to break off a relationship would be voluntary.

Ditto this. At first I thought “all of them” but that isn’t true.

There are two men I regret not sleeping with when I had the chance.

None. (She was on the rag, so it never got that far. :))

First thing I thought of when I read the thread title

Regret? Probably 0.

What fraction would I not sleep with if I lived my life again? A small but measurable portion.

This, definitely. I certainly learned some harsh life lessons from some of my past lovers. But I can’t honestly say that I regret the overall experience; if nothing else, had I never met them, I just would have had to learn those harsh life lessons from someone else.

There are a few I wouldn’t sleep with again…but I don’t regret any of them.

That’s what I think. Yeah, my one ex was a really bad person who caused me a LOT of problems. But he’s not the only person in the world who is really bad and causes a lot of problems, and they all seek out people who are willing to tolerate that kind of thing, which was obviously me at that time.

Bad as it was, it could have been worse. Someone almost like him only slightly different could have been the type that kills you when you try to leave him, rather than just slash your tires and harass you for years, and years later calls you every night at like 4am playing clips of pornos.

So really, I guess the ones I regret are the ones I didn’t even get any worthwhile experience from.