No, really, I want your ideas, because I’m plum out of them.
My ass hurts. The first day I noticed it was just a little sore. Yesterday it felt like I had a huge butt bruise, kicked by a horse level, but not life threatening. Today, today it is obvious that I have sprained my ass. Left butt cheek to be specific. Can’t really walk and sitting hurts a lot. About the only comfortable position is unconsious on my stomach. Quite possibly the weirdest injury I’ve ever had.
How in god’s name did I do that? Sleep-sprinting?
C’mon, gimme a good story to tell my boss when I call in sick beyond “I sprained my ass and can’t walk/sit/stand”
You could tell him you and your SO tried a new position last night, and you hurt yourself doing so. He probably won’t ask for any more details (I know I wouldn’t.)
Seriously, though, tell him you squatted down to pick something up off the floor when you got up, and strained a muscle. That may be what happened, after all.
Check to see if your mattresses are out of whack. Sometimes I’ll have a mattress riding high on the bedframe, tilting it ever-so-slightly to one side. The next morning, I’ll have a sore butt because I was unconsciously compensating for it while I was asleep.
Please don’t ask why or how I could get a mattress to jump the frame…
Its alright Winnowill, I’m laughing too, at least when I’m not whimpering. Its going down hill, but I took the day off work. (My boss was saying he needed me and I was thinking about going in…then I walked the block home from the bus stop. It took me twenty minutes and I was passed by an old lady in a walker, on the right no less. Its four blocks to my work and when I got home I called and told him I wasn’t going to make it.)
Munch, thanks for the suggestion, we actually already checked that. (No comment as to why we knew to check that either.)
Sorry to here about your butt bruise. No really that really sucks.
When I opened this thread I thought it would be about us buttless dopers. I am one of them and it truly sucks ass. If I had a nice jlo butt I would swinging around a pole making some serious cash.
I am betting you have either sciatica or your sacroiliac joint is out of place. The irritation in the nerve is causing your muscle strain. Try getting down on a really hard floor, like tile, and rocking back and forth on your “seat bones”. If you feel a lot of tenderness, then your SI joint is probably the culprit and you can continue to gently rock to massage it, or have someone massage your butt to release the tension. If the pain starts to go down your leg or you start to hesitate when trying to urinate, then it is more likely your sciatic nerve and you should see a doctor or chiropractor. IANAD, but I have a lot of experience with nerve problems.
Hmmm floor and the possiblility of a butt massage…
Will try.
For all of you who are interested I sat in my papasan last night and watched a movie. That actually helped. Its getting better slowy, but I think I’m over the hump so to speak.
And I called my mom. She laughed at me for about ten minutes. I talked to my sister she said, “Oh yea, I’ve done that.” Thanks.
