You can’t imagine it? I live with it and don’t believe what I see. I knew she had IMS when I married her but it’s gotten worse.
Yeah, but it all depends on what a guy thinks is “manipulation.”
If I’m getting chummy with a guy at a bar, dancing with him, wearing sexy clothes, etc., and he’s buying me drinks, am I manipulating him with the promise of sex? If I’m making out with him? I think you have to define what manipulation is first.
Well good for you. Manipulating anyone for anything isn’t very nice. Why is doing it for sex low enough to be compared to (almost!) being a rapist? That’s so insultingly ignorant, it defies words.
Oh please help the poor man who just wants to get laid! When he’s in such a state, he can’t help himself and is easily led away from his senses! If a man gets sucked into a pyramid scheme financially, people would be telling him he should know better. If you own a penis, you should be able to be responsible for it just like you are with your money.
Apparently (according to many) a man’s ultimate goal (because he NEEDS it) is sex and many a man has played many games to get it. Heaven forbid a woman uses her control in the situation to get something she might want out of it. That makes her almost as scummy as a RAPIST who forces himself on someone and scars her forever. Sure, that’s pretty close to the same thing. :rolleyes:
More and more it starting to seem like some (not all, don’t jump me because it isn’t YOU) men are getting these reactions to sex because it is one of the few things where a woman can deny a man something he wants. Taking it makes him a rapist, so pretty much anything a woman does (except give it) makes her a bitch or worse.
Not quite, no, but very near.
Yes. Just as a man is to ignore his physical ability to force himself on women.
Were it not for women, men and boys would spend thier lives running naked through the woods and peeing on trees.
It means getting a guy to do what he wouldn’t do if even the distant implied promise of sex were not dangled in front of him as an incentive. I often buy drinks for women I know very well I won’t sleep with, just for the pleasure of their near company and the fantasy of sex, but that’s not the same thing at all.
Don’t we do that now?! Where wuz you raised?!
They might well, and justly. That does not mean that sort of thing should not be purged forever from human existence. Rape is far worse than sexual manipulation – but both involve a deeply egregious and indefensible abuse of power.
Texas. Pretty much the same, except that for “Trick or Treat”, instead of candy, they give you small calibre ammunition.
Oh thank you kind sir, thank you for resisting the temptation you apparently have to use your physical ability to force yourself on women. Apparently you need to ignore this desire, and we women of the world appreciate it.
Also, men don’t play games and manipulate to get sex?
Let me see if I have this straight… If a man CHOOSES to do something he wouldn’t normally do because of even the DISTANT implied promise of sex, it’s the woman’s fault and she’s almost as bad as a rapist? You cannot be serious. Are you some kind of mental defective? Are you not capable of saying no? You sir should hand in your penis, I’m not sure you can be trusted with it anymore. It apparently can lead you to do things you wouldn’t normally do.
I suppose they do, but they shouldn’t. A man should never tell a woman a lie to get her into bed. That’s not as bad as rape, but I can well understand if a woman who finds the man out afterwards has trouble appreciating the difference.
From Kiping’s “The Female of the Species”:
I’ve never bought that premise, but posts in this thread move me to doubt.
You suppose they do? Again you prove yourself to be a generous soul.
You can understand if a woman has trouble appreciating the difference between being lied to and being raped? And upon preview I see you’ve quote Kipling to show how you’re being so misunderstood. You’re not being misunderstood, I think people are getting a good understanding of how your mind works.
Since you’re so misunderstood let me help you. After you’ve been watched, stalked, hunted, surprised in the night, been beaten, had your bones broken, been repeatedly raped and sodomized and tortured for a few hours… you come back and if you’re still having trouble appreciating the difference between these two very different ideas… I’ll kindly explain them to you in detail. How’s that?
Not really sure what you’re saying here - that women don’t get men? - but I want to say, as a guy, that I find your rape comparison loony as fuck. And I’m not just saying that in the hopes of getting some pussy.
Comparing sexual violence to emotional manipulation is not as radical as you seem to believe. When a man uses physical force on a woman, he leaves bruises on her body (and maybe her mind). When a woman uses psychological manipulation on a man, it leaves bruises on his emotions. Both are real injuries. It’s not as if anyone here is arguing that man-on-woman violence isn’t real, and isn’t a big deal. YOU are the one claiming that psychic damage inflicted by women on men is not that serious. If I said a woman who was raped “looked like she was asking for it,” wouldn’t that be offensive? What if I said a battered wife who chooses to stay with her husband then deserves whatever she gets? Is that fair to say? So why would you then claim that a woman is justified in using her power to force a man to do something?
The only way you can have it both ways is to support an unfair and illogical double-standard. Using force–either physical or emotional–on another person is never justified. It doesn’t matter who is doing it.
Spoken as a man who likes sex, but has learned that when a woman treats it like a transaction it’s time to leave.
But physical abuse is quantifiable. We can pass laws against it, we can say it’s bad, objectively. Emotionally manipulating someone is bad, but you can’t really legislate against it. And I don’t think it’s anywhere near comparable to coercing someone into sex against their will. At least in the case of emotional manipulation, the guy has a choice about it. If he sees he’s being led around by his dick, he can choose to leave the woman. What choice does a woman have who’s being physically molested/raped/etc.?
It maybe leaves bruises on her mind? Give me a break.
The thing is, we’re not talking about FORCING a man to have sex. M-A-N-I-P-U-L-A-T-I-O-N does not equal FORCE. Is that so hard to understand?
A woman manipulating a man to have sex isn’t much different than the games men play to try to get sex. Those are equal comparisons. Your nutty comparison is absurd. Do not even try to say that it is force because a man can’t HELP it. If you really can’t help being sucked into doing something you don’t want to do in order to get sex, you need a psychiatrist.
Don’t you see the contradiction in what you’re saying? Why does a man whose emotions are being played on have somehow more of a choice than a woman who could just walk out the door? Is he supposed to be a Vulcan? A woman can’t help that she is smaller and weaker than a man, and a man can’t help what types of emotional appeals work on him. The whole point of manipulation is that it uses intimate knowledge of a person’s weakness to put him/her in a position where they are incapable of thinking clearly. It fundamentally ROBS them of the ability to choose in their own best interests. If a guy COULD see he was being led around, then he wouldn’t have a problem! That’s what makes it manipulation.
There’s no reason we couldn’t pass laws against emotional manipulation. Emotional damage can be quantified; juries routinely give awards for “pain and suffering.” There once was a time when wife-beating was not illegal either. Laws against it were passed and taken seriously when large portions of the population (and not just women) started taking the matter seriously. The same with this.
Not that I think it will happen. Our society tends to treat damage done by women to men as less serious than the other way around. It’s a vestige of the patriarchy, the idea that women’s actions should be taken less seriously than those of men.
But both men and women can be emotionally taken advantage of. If they’re being manipulated emotionally, they can leave the situation. I’m not really seeing this as a men/women thing. Anyone, man or woman, who is emotionally manipulated is physically able to leave their situation, though they may not see it. And anyone, again, male or female, who is physically forced into something (sex, canasta, etc.) is at a disadvantage.
I’ve been in situations where I’ve felt emotionally manipulated into staying in relationships, but if I’d wanted to, I could’ve gone, and I’ve also been in situations where I’ve been physically abused. I had absolutely no recourse in the latter case, whereas I had every opportunity to leave the former.
BrianGlutton, the reason you might find yourself in the situation of jumping through hoops to get sex is because you got a pathetic mind set.
I’m not defending girls who do this. But really, I can’t muster up a whole lot of sympathy for guys who allow this to happen to themselves.