What if other TV-movies had been marketed?

I’m not sure where to put a humor thread like this, but since it has to do with TV movies as a source of humor, I’m guessing CS. Anyway:

If you have kids- or shares of Disney stock, perhaps- you are no doubt aware of the inexplicable phenomenon that is the TV-movie High School Musical. Despite the fact it was just a simple TV-movie, it has led a typical Disneyesque boom of merchandising that has earned over $100 million, according to one estimate. So naturally, the question comes up: what if other TV-movies had been merchandised? What sort of things would we have seen? I have a few ideas…

Roots Playset: Now you can relive the adventures of Kunta Kinte, as seen in one of the most popular miniseries of all time! Comes with chains and slave-driving whip.

The Day After Nuclear Armageddon Playset: Everything you need to survive a Red nuclear attack. Comes with gas mask, Geiger counter, and week’s supply emergency rations.* (*WARNING: as with all foodstuffs, emergency rations have a limited shelf life. Happy Funtime Products and its parent company, Philip Morris Tobacco, are not responsible if you somehow survive a nuclear attack but die anyway by eating expired emergency rations.)

Sybil Doll: The Doll with Personality(ies)™! Lock Sybil in her chest, shake it up, and see who she comes out as! What personality will Sybil believe she is next?

The Boy in the Plastic Bubble Plastic Bubble: The name basically says everything.

Me & my friends once found a giant inner tube from a truck tire, we named it “Kunta Kinte” and rolled it down the street while beating it with sticks. I guess the moral message of that miniseries was lost on us ten year olds. :eek:

Also in stores:

Fatal Vision official icepicks!

The Burning Bed matches & lighter fluid, plus (if you order in the next 10 minutes) a special heavy face cream to cover up those pesky bruises!

Something About Amelia combination home pregnancy/paternity test!

Stephen King’s The Stand chewable penicillin, with tablets shaped like all your favorite characters…naturally, Laura San Giacomo is our top seller!