My wife(not at the time) told me how sick she was of persistent men hitting on her while she was doing her job as a clerk dealing with the public. She said she had dreams of murdering them all with a samurai sword, slicing them into pieces.
This gave me an erection and I said holy shit I have dreams or brutally murdering annoying people too:D Then I imagined her slicing creepers up with a sword and it was hot and sexy.
Ok your turn.
My husband didn’t really seem like a marriage possibility to me until one evening at a wedding we had a very enjoyable conversation, just speculating of course, on what would be the appropriate methods of punishing some badly behaved children. For the record a combination of fire ants, ropes, and hot fudge was ultimately the decided choice.
My wife did the the whole “Man with a mole on his nose” dialog from *Moonlighting, *by heart, on our first official date. I knew it was destiny.
My husband and I were friends for a long time before we started dating. Once, we were part of a group of friends who went to a drag show together, because we knew a couple of the men in the show. He was the only totally straight man who went. There were a two straight women, a couple of lesbians and a bisexual woman (me), and the rest were gay men (or maybe some of the were bisexual, but they were what one might call gay culture-identified). Anyway, just the fact that he would go to see his friend made me think he was pretty cool, and not macho, if you get what I mean. This was around 1999. Very few straight men would set foot in a gay bar, and definitely not on drag night with a bunch of gay men.
We happened to be the two in the group who didn’t dance, so we ended up talking. Someone asked him if he wanted to dance, and he mumbled something about not being interested, and then confided in me that it wasn’t homophobia, he was just a really terrible dancer. I hate dancing in bars as well, so I was starting to like him a lot. Then he said something about it being too bad one of the drag queens wasn’t really a woman, because she was hot as a woman. I said that I agreed, because I thought she was hot too. He said yeah, but I could just go out with him as a man. I said I didn’t think I’d be attracted to him as a man, and he thought that was really funny, even though I wasn’t trying to make a joke. Then he asked me what kind of man I found attractive. It was totally innocent on his part, but my palms began to sweat. Suddenly this guy I had known for years looked really, really hot to me.
So, every now and then we still go to drag shows, and they kinda work like porn does for most couples.
He cut off my old wedding ring, then used a pocketknife to pry it open enough to remove it, spilling one single drop of blood from my palm in the process.
(True story. He was a paramedic with a ring cutter, and I asked him to help me remove it because the damn thing was stuck so hard nothing else worked and it was pinching a nerve, but there was something so symbolically ovary quivering about that moment…he’d been unsuccessfully pursuing me for 4 years; he was successful shortly thereafter.)
When I met my SO in Central America, she had her arm in a cast with a dislocated elbow. We wanted to go on traveling, and went to the hospital to have the cast removed, and they said they only remove casts in the morning, so come back tomorrow. Rather than wait, I took her to an auto body shop and asked if they had any tools that would take off a plaster cast, and they cut it off with a big pair of tin snips. I knew she was right for me.
Somewhere in between best friends and falling for each other, he was out of town and I had a bad day. I instant messaged him about how down I was feeling, and he said if he was there, he would give me a great big hug.
Me: If you did that, I would melt into a little puddle on the floor.
(long pause)
Him: Then I would scoop you into a container, wait until you re-solidified, and hug you all over again.
Anybody who knows me well can personally attest to the significance of that moment.
Sounds like dialogue from The Runaway Bunny, a really cool book for young children that I used to read to my son when he was a lot younger.
He was wearing latex elf ears as part of his stage persona in a band.
You gotta read a lot of Dr. Seuss.
We were at a convention in Boston (25 years ago, Labor Day) She was wearing a badge that said she was from West Windsor, N.J., not far from where I grew up, and I said I was from there, too. She saw that my badge had a Massachusetts address on it, and I had to explain. Then she told me that she was from Grovers Mill, the part of WW where the Martians landed…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_War_of_the_Worlds_(radio_drama)
…and I knew she was the one for me.