I recently started moonlighting as a bouncer at a pool hall, so it goes without saying that I’ve been running into a lot more drunk people lately. One thing I’ve been noticing is that a lot of them will walk up to me and announce right off the bat how sloshed they are. The following is a conversation I had with a patron of my bar last night.
“Hey, Ashtar! Guess what?”
“No, you don’t understand. I’m, like, totally drunk!”
“No, seriously. I’m really, really drunk right now.”
“No, I’m serious. Do you understand what I’m trying to tell you?”
“Yeah, that you’re drunk. That’s cool. Do you need me to call you a cab?”
“No no no. I’ll be fine. I’ve just had a lot to drink.”
“Okay, well have fun.”
I get telling someone that you’re drunk if you think you’ve just said something stupid. Ive done it myself more times than I care to count. But it’s got me wondering why people who are messed up on other substances don’t announce it.
“Guess what? I’m really stoned right now! I just smoked three joints and…what?”
“Dude, do you have any idea how much coke I just snorted? My entire paycheck’s worth! Yeah!”
“Man, I just took so much acid that I…whoa! The colors! I can see the music!”
What is it about alcohol that encourages people to just announce to total strangers how much alcohol they’ve consumed?