Most of my clothes don’t have pockets.
[QUOTE=Cluricaun]
Somethings are useless, but other things can’t be seen as anything but an out and out fraud, such as the [virus-infected link broken]
I have to agree with RiverRunner–it’s a JOKE item. Thus it is excluded from this thread as defined in the OP.
The omelette pan: Growing up we had one that worked really well and it really did make it easier to cook an omelette. I bought one as an adult and it was a flimsy piece of crap that didn’t help at all. Hmmm… I wonder if I can get my mom to give me that one from her house. I strongly doubt she makes omelettes…
Anything on this, especially the easy to use toothbrush. (wtf?)
<cough>GNC</cough> 
Me too, I’ve been using the Black & Decker 18 volt for over a year now on a weekly basis (except during winter, of course) and love it!
My nomination:
Television.
The pump-action hard-boiled egg peeler.
You know: the one that takes the shell off by puncturing the shell and blowing air into it.
It only works if you follow the directions and immerse the cooked eggs in ice water for several minutes. Of course, if you immerse your cooked eggs in ice water for several minutes, the egg pulls away from the shell enough that it’s a snap to peel anyway - without having another ridiculous gadget taking up space in the cupboard. Take it out, cleaning it, and putting it away actually takes up more time.
Just to warn people, the site with the review of the DVD rewinder had a pop-up ad with a Trojan in it that set off my anti-virus and crashed Firefox. Luckily it never loaded. (thank you, Firefox!)
Seriously? For real? You honestly think that TV has no use? That nothing of any value has ever come of TV? Or are you just being snarky to sound like you’re better than everyone because you’re not a “slave to the TV”? To think that TV falls into the scope of this thread is absurd, and your “nomination” is disingenuous.
I’ve always thought the Febreze ‘Scent Story’ thing was the stupidest thing ever, except as a detection device for horrible people. If you are so bored that you need your room de-stinkifyer to tell you a story, then you must have the most boring life ever! For fucks sake read a book!
Flea collars.
Why? Do they not work or is there something better or do you just not mind fleas?
True enough, the snark is obvious, isn’t it.
I’m not better than everyone else, it’s just that I haven’t watched TV in over 15 years and I don’t miss it a bit, so, for me, it’s worthless.
Indeed - let’s nominate the internet and be done with it whilst we’re at it.
Hi all.
I have a Ronco product I really like, though its pretty stupid and fills a need that barely exists.
You know when you go on a picnic? And your plate is sitting on your lap? And that darn boiled egg is rolling all over the place?
Grrrrrr…
What you need the the Ronco “Egg Cuber”!
Yes, now you can have cubical boiled eggs that don’t roll off the plate! Thank the gods!
This thing is the bomb!
The downside is it takes about 15 minute to properly prepare one boiled egg. Not that you have to “oversee” the whole 15 minute process. But that is the time it takes get one done. I guess I need to get a dozen of them.
One I made a dozen or so once…took most of the day to do it. But feeding those to young children and spinning some BS yarn about “Siberian Tundra Chickens”, slick flat ice, the vunerability of eggs, and evolution was just priceless…heck I even had a few adults going for a bit.
You can have my Ronco egg cuber when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
Now that I think about it…I am getting a bald spot that needs work…I think I better stock up on some Ronco bald spot/dark silly string spray on covering for the old growing chrome dome…
Long Live the square egg!
Blll
This thread isn’t about what isn’t personally worthwhile to you. That’s like a bald person coming in and saying that shampoo is the most useless thing they know of. Just because you don’t like or use something doesn’t make it a useless product. I think what this thread is about was pretty clearly defined in the OP. It’s about things that don’t work for what they say they do, or create more hassle than they solve, etc.
They don’t work. OTOH, flea drops (like Revolution) have worked pretty well for me (and my pets).
Frothee Creamy Head. Makes every drink look like beer!
I nominate the leaf-blower.
It does the opposite of what you should be doing with leaves, dust, and debris. Instead if gathering it up in piles for convenient disposal it spreads it all over the fucking place–including the street, the neighbors yard, and in your face.
And it does it all with a noise like a jet plane taking off right outside your window at 7:30 on a saturday morning! Don’t forget the enticing aroma of oily 2-stroke engine exhaust!
Rakes and brooms do the job properly and about as fast without wasting our depleted fossil fuels and without the air- and noise-pollution. Plus, they’re cheaper and provide a free workout.
We have an electric leaf blower, and while you’re right, it sucks at dealing with a yard full of leaves, it’s really good at clearing off the driveway after you mow the yard and have grass clippings everywhere. We just blow them back into the grass; problem solved.
If you don’t like leaf blowers, they do have leaf suckers. That’s probably not what they’re called, but that’s what they do. They even have a neat shredding area before the bag.
Doing a whole lawn would . . . um. . . suck, though. The bag doesn’t hold much. You get a good workout though. Ours is electric, so it’s not quite as noisy, plus you have to tote around the weight of the cord.
Great for leaves in flower beds.
For useless, I’d like to nominate all of those fake products that are sold to take the place of laundry detergent. I thought the laundry balls were a rip-off. Last year, though, I was introduced to a bigger rip-off. You can buy, for hundreds of dollars, an ionization system that you can attach to the hose leading into your washer. It shines UV light on the water. There was a great deal of handwaving literature associated with the sales. You’ll never need to buy detergent again!
I made a point of forgetting the name of the system, so I can’t point you toward a website. I think it had high numbers in its name, though. Something like The Ripoff 3000 ™.