Did you ever try to put one of those things around a flea’s neck? It’s frickin’ impossible.
Oh man, the stuff on this page is pure comedy gold.
My two favorites:
The E Crystal
*It is now used primarily in refrigerators to add energy to foods, make them taste better and last much longer (I have observed 2-5 weeks instead of 2-5 days). Also worn in the pocket or bra for chaos protection. Energize your bath water! Many more uses. (US$69.00)
Price: USD $69.00 CAD $79.95 *
(Further information also reveals: *Powerful, Practical and Effective! More value than either the excellent Bio Electric Shield or the highly regarded Q-Link. Plus, much more ENERGY! All at half the price! The E Crystal Environmental Chaos Eliminator has already become HUGELY successful! *)
QE Pendant
*The QE Pendant besides having a very large field of chaos energy protection also has the ability to keep coherent energies in motion. Energy that stagnates in the body builds up and can cause serious problems over time.
[…]
Price: USD $189.00! CAD $219.95! *
Car Alarms.
Have you ever heard one of these go off and not think: ‘Dumbass…’.
It a magnifying glass to be mounted in front of your screen.
It got mine too. I reported the post.
The majority of products in the Pampered Chef range fit the description of ‘solution looking for a problem’ or ‘useless product’. Sure, there is a sprinkling of great products (the big glass jugs with snap-on plastic lids, for example) but most of them are just pointless.
For example: The one-handed rolling pin - which is just like a little paint roller with a hard drum instead of a fuzzy one. Why? I can see that it would be useful for a small number of people who only have the use of one hand, but otherwise… why?
At the promotional party, the rep delivered a big (and obviously canned) speech about how now, you only need use one hand to roll out your pastry!. This is not a significant advance in culinary science if:
-It doesn’t really work very well
-All you do with your other hand is let it hang limply by your side.
I guess if you’re a true ambidexter and can simultaneously use the other hand for chopping onions or something, then it’s an absolute boon, otherwise, not.
OK…You beat me. I thought I had the win with leaf blowers, but I somehow managed to ban car alarms from my mind at just the wrong time.
Much higher annoyingnessubiquityuselessness factor.
I’ve gotten several complaints that the link to the dvd rewinder tries to download a virus, so I broke it.
How about those teeny, tiny personal massagers? You know, the ones that take AAA batteries? I mean like that is going to help with your back or something! And why would women want to carry them in their purse anyway? Do women with desk jobs get back strain a lot?
What? You say they are not for your back? :eek:
I’m sorry I jumped in with what I thought was a funny aside. It wasn’t funny to anyone else and you’d think I’d be used to that by now.
“Mind the overspray!”
/Bridget Jones’s Mum
I thought it was funny and an interesting perspective. The anal control freak shit is pretty ridiculous.
For rolling pastry inside the cookie sheet, so you can get the pastry right up into the edge of the pan. I use it for focaccia.
I would have thought somebody would have mentioned those adhesive things you put on your feet that are supposed to “draw out the toxins.”
Funny, though, how all of the products mentioned so far seem to sell. This seems to indicate to me that somebody finds them useful.
I think it just indicates that they are well-marketed and that there are some people that think they will be useful, and then order them, and then ten years later ask themselves, “Hey, have we ever even USED this thing that chops eggs into perfect cubes?”
Some people think the same way about television. It’s all personal opinion.
Some people think that the vast majority of televisions ever purchased are sitting in the back of someone’s junk drawer, completely unused?
Well, you learn something new every day, I tell you what.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t energy in foods called calories?
Maybe we’ve now found the source of America’s obesity problem. Our refrigerators are making us fat!
Christ yes.
The car alarm is completely useless. Let’s put it this way. How many times have you heard a car alarm go off and think, “Ohmigod, someone is stealing a car! Call the cops!” No, you hear the car alarm and think, “If I had a baseball bat I’d smash the fuck out of that car–and while I’m at it, I’ll hit the owner in the testicles a couple three times.”
Car alarms should be illegal.
Y’all know about the ultrasonic pest repellers you plug in to a wall socket. Proven many times to be absolutely worthless…
I saw an ad on TV a couple weekends ago for a digital ultrasonic pest repeller…
:dubious: