From my mentally ill uncle. I don’t blame him, he’s a sick puppy (not in a disgusting way, just sad).
I see him about one a year. I don’t talk to him in the interim.
He apparently went on and on to my parent for a month about how he found the PERFECT gift for me for xmas. They were like WTF? You see mozchron for 5 hours once a year - why are you spending so much effort? But w he hatever.
I arrive home. he’s there. He says “I found the BEST gift for you!” Keeps mentioning it all night.
Present time. He brings out this box, with a big smile. I mentally steel myself and open it.
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Its a 14 inch high cheap ceramic statue of a blue fairy princesses. Like you would get at a garden shop for 6 bucks, or, most likely, he got at a garage sale for 25 cents.
He’s BEAMING. I gulp, look at my parents, who are dying trying to keep from laughing, and say, “uh…thank you.”
I left it at my parents house. They told him it was too large for me to bring home in my luggage. My mom is pissed because she has to bring it out every time he comes over, or he asks about it.
As a wedding gift, we got (from an ex-boss of mine) a how-to book entitled (something like) “How To Find Your Romantic Partner,” which neither of us expected to have much use for.
Of course, after we got divorced, I might have found that gift useful and appropriate but it was long since in the trash.
For my friend’s birthday once, everybody piled up our (differently packaged and shaped) presents in the corner and she started opening them. The first present was… a brick! Haha, funny. The second present was… a brick! LOL! The third present was… a brick! THIS IS SO FUNNY.
The thirteenth present was… a brick! STILL FUNNY.
The eighteenth present was… a brick! Kinda losing the funny now.
Then we went and got all the real presents out of the cupboard.
I was in a friend’s wedding. He got all the groomsmen a brass pocket change holder shaped like a seashell. He was quite proud of it. So proud that I wondered if he was having me on. He went on at lengths about how he kept searching for the perfect gift and when he came across this he knew he had found it! I probably still have it somewhere, unless I lost it in one of my moves.
No clue, I have been to New York since I was a babe. Do you see this in New York often? If so, then there’s a lot of kudzu in New York. That hump in the middle is a house. Unchecked, kudzu can cover one in a couple of years.
(If you were being sarcastic, just ignore my post. My sarcasm meter blew up from all the snarkiness on this board.)
Yea, mine too. I learned a lot about my father that would’ve changed my relationship with him had I known about it before he died instead of after.
We received a bang-up gift for our wedding: from one of our more religious relatives, a cheap Jesus suncatcher. The thing was maybe 10" x 7" or so, so it was biggish. And cheap. Seriously, it maybe cost a dollar. Two, at most. (The cost I have no problem with. But you could’ve spent that on something other than a Jesus suncatcher, am I right? Or just get us a card - we’d be totally happy with that.)
We were doing the whole unwrapping thing in front of his parents (they were the only ones who were interested), when it came up. My father, who didn’t have a clear view, asked “What is that?” My husband holds it up and cries out, “Don’t you recognize your saviour?”
We laughed like loons. And tossed the oversized religious shrinky-dink.
In college, I received a toy stuffed frog dressed in a frilly pink princess dress and pointy hat (the kind with the veil hanging from the tip?) from one of my mom’s good friends.
I’m IN COLLEGE
I have never been interested in frog stuff
I have never been interested in princess stuff
COLLEGE, remember?
My mom’s friend went on and on about how the minute she saw it, she knew it was perfect for me. I tried, very hard, to hide the “wtf?” feeling I was having and thanked her very politely.
I think I still have that thing somewhere, in a box of “shit that is potential gifts for someone else.”
Well, it was a birthday gift from a friend of mine who’s sort of…strange. In a good way. I don’t think I can quite do her justice in a single message board post. Her reasoning was that I could hide the condom if I were ever in a place where I had to look morally upright. Like with the parents. (Though I think they’d be more shocked by the Bible than by the prophylactic.)
I kind of wish someone had given me the froggy princess. I’m a sucker for stuffies.
I can’t beat the machete, but my friend gave me a magnetic photo holder for my birthday. It has two pieces held together by magnets. I was thinking, do you see any photos on my desk? What would make you think I wanted to display photos? Also, since I work on the computers, why would you give me something with a magnet? He also gave me a keychain with a light on it that was obviously too weak for the amount of keys I carried.
