My scores would be:
Miller’s Crossing: {8 of 10}
Barton Fink: {7 of 10}
Raising Arizona: One of the funniest movies I’ve ever seen. {12 of 10}
Hudsucker Proxy: Huge misfire. Rent His Girl Friday instead. {2 of 10}
shrug
I am going to have to throw my hat into the ring with those that enjoyed Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, I went to the theatre hoping for a 1930’s Sci-Fi serial with neat stylized effects and a posthumous Sir Lawrence Olivier and that is exactly what I saw, in fact I just picked that up on DVD a few days ago.
As for the worst movie I have seen in the last 30 days, that would have to be Ultraviolet. We rented it in the hopes of seeing a bad, but entertaining action flick. It was bad. But then it got worse, we started commenting that pretty much every single scene seemed to be a rip off from Equilibrium, only done really badly. I looked it up and found out that it was written/directed by the same guy who made Equilibrium. Talk about a one trick pony.
The worst thing about Ultraviolet wasn’t that it was bad, or shot like a two hour perfume commercial, it’s that it was really, really boring. “Boring” is probably the worst thing a movie can be. Not even Mila Jovovich’s ass could save that movie.
Overall, meh, but I loved it for the scene where he tells his daughter his hates her too. I know that sounds bad, but it was this really true blurting out of what you might feel toward a kid sometimes.
Man, I never thought I would agree with that statement, and yet it is so true.
I caught Society’s Child on Lifetime [cue ominous music], having seen it once before, and taped it for future reference.
I believe the phrase “what. the. fuck. ?” applies to this particular flik particularly well.
Your standard Lifetime movie (like “The Abused Housewife Who Accidentally Killed her Policeman Husband in Self Defence”), but seemingly…twisted, exagerated, seemingly to the point of self-parody, but without a touch of irony (Kinda like Verhoeven, if the theories are correct). Featuring a cast of broken, thouroughly unlikable characters, and told—via voiceover—from the point of view of an impossibly-wise little girl who’s hopelessly crippled by a neurological disorder (Think “The Wonder Years,” starring Steven Hawking). Also featuring the ghost of said girl’s stillborn sister, who looks like one of the children of the corn.
I still puzzle over why the hell this movie exists. It doesn’t seem to have a “moral,”* much of an allegory, or even info-tainment value. It just…is.
You have to see it for yourself, to believe it. Not that you’d want to.
*Aside from giving me the vague impression that all the characters should be sterilized, forcibly given psychiatric medication, and possibly sent to a gulag. But since I get that feeling from most Lifetime movies, that’s not telling me much.
I have to say **Gypsy 83 ** starring Sara Rue which I got from Netflix. She does get nekkid, which is a highlight - but the rest of the movie was pure torture to sit through.
Elektra. I never did have much use for the original comic character, so the changes from the source material didn’t bother me in the slightest. The fact that it was drearily, boringly bad, rather than “OMGWHATWERETHEYTHINKING?!” entertainingly bad was what I objected to. (The closest I came was “why exactly does the ruthless assassin decide to play bodyguard? Do Goran Visnjic’s eyes have some secret superpower I was unaware of?”) In that respect, even an abomination like Catwoman is more enjoyable.
Lady in the water
I wasn’t that impressed with Miami Vice
Right, so you liked it then? Seriously, that can’t be meant as an insult, can it? 
I finally got around to checking out Pirates of the Carribean: Curse of the Black Pearl the other day. The idea really hadn’t excited me, but I thought that once I started watching it, I would probably love it. I was wrong. Turned it off after about half an hour, bored out of my gourd.
Ugh, I watched The Getaway last night, which I’d never seen before. It was mind-numbingly dull, and so many scenes just draaaaaagged on for way too long.
I thought the acting was pretty poor, the characters not very well-defined (I really didn’t care about what happened to anyone), and outside of Steve McQueen and Ali MacGraw, every character was just so ugly. Which isn’t a problem per se, but on top of all that boring, it was just too much.
Now granted, I have been devouring Hustle these days (which is great – so intriguing and twisty), and found this paragraph on that site:
so I was misled into believing The Getaway is a con film – it’s not, really, there’s about one con – when it would be better described as a heist film. And it’s not even a good one! The thing I like best about heist movies is the planning and execution of the heist, which in this case was over by the first half hour! And it wasn’t even very cool!
Anyway you get the idea.
I loved Raising Arizona. Loved O Brother Where Art Thou. (Bought those two on DVD.) Liked Fargo (and certainly did see it as a black comedy) and Miller’s Crossing OK. Don’t remember how well I liked Barton Fink–it’s been a very long time since I saw that one. Liked Intolerable Cruelty. Got turned off by the violence in Blood Simple. (Yeah there’s violence in those other movies, but it doesn’t seem quite as ugly.) And I didn’t like TMWWT.
Oh Monkey Chews reminded me…
I did see POTC: Dead Man’s Chest… That movie was fucking terrible.
It’s a tie between The Ant Bully and Monster House. Both the worst kind of bad movies - so dull there isn’t even any fun in mocking them.
Even the fact that it was an animated kid’s movie couldn’t stop me from saying, “Nobody on the whole block notices a giant killer house fighting a bulldozer?”
Methinks the success of Cars (another yawner) means that a whole batch of mediocre-at-best animated films are going to get the green light. Unfortunately. Animation now is what special effects were ten years back - very nice, very well done, not nearly enough to justifiy twentyfive bucks and two hours of my life.
Regards,
Shodan
Below, a “horror” flick set in a World War II submarine. A pile of underwater dreck with an incomprehensible plot.