While watching one of those Time-Life infomercials, I finally got to see what the lead singer looked like. He’s a skinny little blond guy with a seriously bad case of 70s blow-dried hair.
It was the 70s. The only people who didn’t have a bad case of blow-dried hair were the ones with 2-foot afros…
I somehow expected the lead to singer to big a bigger guy. A case of pre-historic Rick Astley Syndrome, I suppose.
Some of the 50-something WWII vets were still wearing brylcreme.
Wilson Bryan Key, who also wrote Media Sexploitation and The Clam-Plate Orgy. I don’t recall his later work on rock lyrics, but it’s possible. The man has issues.
I recall hearing this, of all places, on Dr. Demento’s radio show.
That’s the funniest summary of that song (I Am, I Said) that I’ve EVER READ.
Thank you, that’s the one. There was only so much googling I wanted to do on the words “young girl”…
<hijack>
I just googled Rick Astley. :eek:
I swear, I always thought he was a tall, black dude. Just, yknow, from his voice.
Wow.
</hijack>
As opposed to being Howdy Doody’s buffer older brother?
Seconded. It’s an awful song in its own right, but the kids just love it, which makes it even more odious.
Nothing like watching a roomful of skankily dressed teens bumping and grinding to a t&a song. Ahhh, the innocence of youth.
Okay, the Black Eyed Peas song isn’t great, but it’s so catchy - wonderful for, you know, dancing or partying to.
I despise country music in general: it’s twangy and mopey, generally the artists are horrible and untalented, and the lyrics are mind-numbing and idiotic.
Any of the patriotic aural glurge - God Bless America, that Red White and Blue song, and there’s some horrid, wretched thing about “This flag’s not a rag” or some rot, which really makes me want to smash the radio and then, perhaps, set fire to the culture that produced this drivel.
I really hate that stuff.
I can’t believe nobody nominated “Hey-hey We’re the Monkeys”
That, is a way bad song…and not like in a transverse dichotomy where “bad” is more like…“baaad”, rather just plain horrible.
Right up that alley and on an even keel goes “Shiny Happy People” by REM even though I will sit through the video with the mute button pressed to see Kate Pierson shimmy in her go-go boots.
Even that can’t save the fact that the song suuuuuuuuuuks so bad on every level.
What would you like to have had The Monkees sing as the theme to their television show?
Hey you kids, get off my lawn!
If that’s part of the lyrics, I wouldn’t know-I try to block that piece of shit out of my memory.
I like the original “Hooked on a Feeling”.
“My Humps”-what do you expect from a group where the lead singer pisses herself while performing on stage?
Here is something i’ve found. I find it difficult to disagree with any of these offences against musical taste.
- The Birdie Song - The Tweets
- Teletubbies Say Eh-Oh - The Teletubbies
- Barbie Girl - Aqua
- Agadoo - Black Lace
- I Should Be So Lucky - Kylie Minogue
- We’re Going To Ibiza - Vengaboys
- Grandma We Love You - St Winifred’s School Choir
- Shaddap Your Face - Joe Dolce
- Achy Breaky Heart - Billy Ray Cyrus
- Lady In Red - Chris De Burgh
Honorable mentions go to :-
Save Your Love - Rene and Renata
Agadoo - Black Lace
Orville’s Song - Keith Harris
If - Telly Sevalas
Achie Breaky Heart - Billy Ray-Cyrus
Long Haired Lover From Liverpool - Jimmy Osmond
And last, but by no means least :-
Macarena - Los Del Rio
And to make matters worse here are the dance steps, and you can also hear portions of the song.
And here is the Klingon version.
I am so relieved to find someone else who feels this way. To twangy and mopey and drivel, let us add: whiny, nasal, self-righteous.
I share your hate.
Right. Show me the Klingon with the balls to do the Macarena.
Just for that, here is some payback:
Generally speaking I’m a fairly peaceable person. But there is one song that had me contemplating murder each time my dorm neighbors played it loud enough to shake the walls.
That song is “Hard Knock Life” by Jay Z.
He should burn in hell for recording it.
You’ve Got the Look by some foreign band. I hear the lyrics are off. “Lovin like a dog”
Well, now I have to take a bit of exception to that. If you’re talking about the commercially produced glurge from the fake cowboy factory line, yeah, I’m right with you on that. But some of the classic stuff is really good, like vintage Johnny Cash or Patsy Cline.
Yeah, this is pretty awful. In fact it’s so awful that I hesitate to call it music. I’m not normally a conspiracy nut, but I strongly suspect the a lot of this stuff is indirectly contracted out by by government officials and funded out of black budgets. In many ways, country music is our Pravda. Why force propaganda and advertising down people’s throats when you can create stuff that they’ll gobble up hand over fist?
Please excuse my cynicism, I’m fighting off both a wicked hangover and an existential crisis today.