Something I was once told:
There is a huge difference between infertility and sterility.
If this was 1900 I’d be worried too, but it’s not.
Do you have a higher risk? Yes, but the risk can be minimized by proper medical checkups.
Don’t listen to scare tactis, each pregnency is different from the others.
Though not the same thing, my mother had me at 45, my brother was 10 years younger. She thought she’d been in menopause for two years.
My mum said “I was her easiest ever.” She said “No morning sickness, no discomfort and she said she felt her labor pains at 5:30am, woke up my dad and by 6:00am they were in the ER and at 6:03am, one push and it was over.” She said it was so easy, yet her doctors thought because of the age, there would be difficulties.
Now granted it’s different 'cause she had other children in her 30s, but medical science has come a long way and they can minimize the risks. Not eliminated them but reduce them.
Also remember anyone at anytime can have a baby with defects. I know parents that have ONE baby born with a defect but the other kids are fine. There’s no way to be absolutely sure.
Don’t let the possiblity of something bad happen stop you from enjoying your pregnancy.
That’s like saying “I always wanted to see a Broadway show, but if I actually go to NYC and see one, then I will have done it and have nothing to look forward to.”
Obviously you’re nervous and if that is so, go to another doctor and get a second or even third opinion.
I loved having an older mum and dad. Also look for groups of mother. Try meetup.com and see if there are any groups of mums or expectant mums. At my gym a lot of women join the expectant mothers workout classes. They do streching, yoga, lift weights and all sorts of things. Nothing takes the fear out of something like associating with someone who’s been there.
And don’t forge to post Jr’s pic here when you have him/her 
I had a friend (adopted) in High School whose mother was told she would never bear children. Having been told this early on in their marriage was why they decided to adopt a baby.
Well, when I knew him in school we were 16; his mother was 43. She missed a number of periods and attributed it to menopause (peri-menopause was more-or-less unheard of then). Finally she went to her doc because of her inability to lose the weight she had suddenly gained. It was then she was informed she was six months pregnant, with her first biological child. High risk to be sure, especially given this was in 1978!
The following month, my circle of friends had a “Big Brother Shower” at which we gave him big/little versions of gift: a pair of athletic socks for him, a pair of booties for his baby brother; a baby bottle for the baby, a hip flask for Richard, etc.
Three months later, his mother gave birth to a perfectly healthy baby boy.
Congratulations and best of luck!
I’m so happy for you!! I felt like I was reading a post I could have typed last year!
Last summer I found out I was pregnant for the first time at 43–was 44 when I had my little girl in December 2008. She’s 9 months old now, I can’t believe I lived for so long without her. I couldn’t have been more shocked to see that little baby on the sonogram screen the day I went in to find out why I was having such horrible stomach pains. Turned out it wasn’t appendicitis after all.
I was EXACTLY like you…had never been on birth control my whole life, had just accepted that I was not meant to have children. My husband had 3 grown kids, I just figured I’d be an aunt and a grandmother to my stepkids’ kids. Then this little life decided to pick me for her mommy!!
It’s truly a miracle. Enjoy this time, you will look back on these months as some of the most special of your life. And being a mom is an absolute BLAST, we are having a great time raising our special little girl.
You really made my day sharing your story with us…congratulations!!!
A year ago I had my first baby at 41. He’s picture perfect.
Take my advice and don’t worry! I heard the “higher risk of birth defects” meme repeated ad nauseam. I swear, that little sentence is the second most repeated phrase a mother over 40 will hear, right after “congratulations”. Do people actually think they are telling you something useful there?:rolleyes:
Unfortunately, I bought into that meme myself, and in early pregnancy I ended up emotionally bracing myself for an handicapped baby or an agonizing choice to end the pregnancy. But when I actually looked up the numbers for the risk, they are TINY. The risk of serious birth defects is very, very small. The risk when you are 45 is bigger, but still TINY. And when I saw that healthy jumping shrimp on the 3 month ultrasound, all that worry just evaporated.
At 45, you will have a lot of life experience and good financial security to offer your baby. He’s fortunate to have you as a mother.
Can I get an Amen?!? I was 38 when I delivered my last baby. The doc wanted me to have an amniocentesis, because at that age, the risk of having a baby with Down’s syndrome was 1 in 200. I looked at the doctor and said I wasn’t going to have a sonogram because, for one thing, the results wouldn’t change my mind about continuing the pregnancy (they can tell if the baby will have Down’s, but not to what degree); two, the risk of amnio induced miscarriage was the same as the chance my baby would have Down’s (!); three, I preferred to think of it as a 199 in 200 chance that the baby wouldn’t have Down’s! So there. Take that, Mr. Dr. Man! 
Other than having to be delivered C-section (as were her two older sisters), everything was good. I had slightly more trouble with elevated blood pressure and had to be on partial bed rest. I followed the doctor’s orders. I now have a wonderful 9YO daughter.
Congratulations! Wishing you a healthy and easy pregnancy and delivery.
The oldest pregnant woman I know (through work) was 53! Everything turned out fine!
Congratulations to you! I’m an old mama too; my last was born just a few weeks before I turned 41. He’s wonderful and perfect. My mother delivered my twin sisters just shy of 40 and my sister-in-law is carrying on the tradition, with her nearly 2-year-old born when she was 40 as well.
I’ll follow your pregnancy with interest! Please keep us updated.
Congrats! My boss just had a healthy, wonderful baby… and she’s 42.
I’ve been told I’ll probably never have kids… you give me hope!
Congrats! My boss just had a healthy, wonderful baby… and she’s 42.
I’ve been told I’ll probably never have kids… you give me hope!
Oh yes. Remember when you are in the hospital, that doctors are focussing on risks. That is their business, and they will try to get you focused on everything that may go wrong, too. So don’t forget to enjoy what you can, and don’t let them worry you too much.
My sister had her first baby at 34, after years of trying, and her second at 41. Both of my nephews are fine!