malkavia: Just so you know, there IS no official language in the US. It just so happens that English is spoken in 98% of the country. There’s been a movement to get it adopted as the official language, but it’s failed so far. So until then, people can post it in Spanish, German, Portuguese, whatever. It just so happens that the second most spoken language in the US is spanish.
Jman
***Damn you, Crunchy Frog! I saw your post just as I was getting ready to post mine!!! ***
Deep down, inside, I really do wish that eating meat was illegal. I wouldn’t actually support it as a law, because the more reasonable part of my brain knows it isn’t fair, but my emotional core personality still wants it that way.
I really don’t like stupid people (I’m not talking about the mentally handicapped/etc. I’m talking about just everyday stupid people)
I intentionally cough and gag when people wearing 9 gallons of perfume walk by, and I usually say to whoever is with me “my god did you smell that person?” loud enough for them to hear it. :::hangs head in shame:::
I laugh out loud when teenagers wearing those size 9,000,000 baggy off the butt jeans walk by me. This isn’t actually on purpose, I just can’t help it.
I eat meat, and occasionally smoke cigars.
I’m not attracted to obese or disabled women.
My ex-girlfriend (from Boulder) broke up with me because I told her the “busdriver and the nun” joke, which she found offensive to both Catholics and gays.
I support the use of public transit for others, so there’s less congestion on the road, thus making the drive to work much more pleasant for me.
I’m buying a house in the midst of suburban sprawl. Quarter acre lot, two car garage, yard that needs regular irrigaton, three bedrooms, two bathrooms, one resident.
I think that the troubles experienced by groups claiming oppression are brought on by themselves, much more so than by The Man.
I have a penis.
I’m a registered Democrat, but I vote for who I damn well please. I voted for Reagan in '84, and I’m still convinced it was the right choice.
I call 'em fat, blind, deaf, and retarded – not “horizontally challenged,” “visually disabled,” “aurally challenged” or “special.”
I don’t like rap or hip-hop music.
To the population of Boulder, Colorado – I could give two shits about Tibet. Pfft!
I believe that it should be illegal to bear children without first being properly licensed as a parent. Same thing with pet ownership – take some classes, then get your license, then get a dog.
I like 1960s era muscle cars.
I believe that environmentalists should stop burning ski lodges and large suburban houses – and start chainsawing billboards. The United States is growing uglier by the day, and nobody gives a shit.
I believe that immigrants from Spanish-speaking countries should make a go of assimilation. I also believe that Univision and Telemundo should have English language SAP broadcasts.
I tell sexist and off color jokes.
I can’t stand Tom Hanks (I don’t know if that makes me politically incorrect, but it apparently makes my very unAmerican)
When I see someone who is stupid enough to ride their motorcycle without a helmet (or some other such foolish behavior) and then crash and die, I don’t call it bad luck, I call it the “thinning of the herd”.
I feel that the American government makes mistakes from time to time gasp and should take responsiblity for them double gasp. I know, I know, it makes me some sort of pinko commie bitch for saying that, but oh well.
I liked Showgirls. Yes, the movie with the girl from Saved by the Bell. I liked Starship Troopers too.
So there.
I think God and religion is a crutch for the weak.
Some animals are meant to be eaten. I don’t fancy cows, pigs or little lambs all that much. But chicken…I must have my chicken.
If you can’t afford the time or money to look after your kids, don’t have them.
Protestants who call me a Virgin-worshipper ought to rot in hell, for their sheer arrogance.
Scantily-dressed women are asking for it.
I’m a lesbian who enjoys straight porn.
If someone pleads insanity they should be placed in a mental health institute, not set free.
I sometimes have penis envy.
Some people in my country ought to count themselves lucky there’s a no-gun law.
I find Nazi uniforms sexy. They were horrid buggers, yes, but they looked good.
I don’t like tourists.
When was the last time you were catching a bit of CNN and noticed that Congress was in session and everyone was speaking Hebrew?
No?
No!
English. They speak English. Government speaks English. and we all love the Government.
huggles Big Brother
I run naked through synagogues for fun.
Aw,jarbaby:
I’m over 60, and I was really,REALLY looking forward to you bending over backward for me. Is that anti-PC?
wow dude me too. Although except a very tiny bit off on the Socialist part. I got disgusted with ever otehr system so I made up my own. The world
s first Mock Capitalist.
But the worst is I am very very lazy. Hmm maybe I’ll put it this way, yeah I could go out and save some forest but I’d rather play video games.
And yeah I can see why you’d want to save stuff but personally I want armageddon to come along. I think it would be real cool. I mean just imagine it, mushroom clouds as far as the eye could see. I could ski all year long in Honolulu. I would love to see sea levels rise 150 to 300 feet, that would be awesome.
No needy Chow/something mix in my house. I got my dog not from a pound, rescue group or humane society; but rather from a “hobby breeder” who breeds show dogs and works to improve the breed.
This is going to sound bad, but I don’t agree with hate crime legislation. I don’t think you should get charged twice for the same crime. And since when is it illegal to hate some one?
I eat meat.
I beat up Militant Smokers. With a Mace. Lots of Spikes.
I sneer at people who claim to be oppressed by “The Man.”
I generally follow my own conscience and ignore what anyone wants me to do.
I love old musclecars.
I hate SUV driving people who’ll never even take the thing on a gravel road, much less actual dirt. Don’t buy it if you’re going to drive it on pavement only! What’s the point of owning something that gets 12mpg if it’s going to sit on pavement all day?
I abuse snobs.
I hurt people who make fat jokes.
I abuse intellectual snobs.
I file anyone involved in the little “Darwin vs God cute sign war” as a Moron. This includes evolutionsts and creationists.
I go my own way. You don’t like it? Tough.
I’m still looking for the perfect bumper sticker for my car…
“Shoot a gay whale for Jesus”
I’m just an equill oportunity offender…I’ll piss anybody off 
as for the bit about the monkey, I think that it was eather Sam Kinnosin or Bobcat Goldwaith who said it
I also love meat. If I had to choose between nuclear war or no more meat, I say war.
I also think hate crime legislation is stupid. Murder is murder, assault is assault, and harrasment is harrasment.
I find this not merely un-PC, but truly frightening. And that this sentiment came from a woman, even more so.
[ul]
[li]I think everyone, regardless of sex, should be treated courteously. However, I still like some of the old-fashioned “chivalry”, such as having a man help me with my coat (both taking it off and putting it on), opening my car door (seeing me safely in, as well as coming around and extending a hand to help me out), etc.[/li][li]I’m against animal experimentation because I think it’s cruel an unusual punishment. But until we stop killing animals for meat, I don’t see the difference between that and killing an animal to wear its coat (so long as they’re raised for that purpose and killed quickly and humanely, not caught in those horrid leg traps).[/li][li]I don’t feel the need to be Super Woman and “have it all”. I don’t want strangers raising my children. If I can’t afford to give up my career and stay home to raise my own children until they’re old enough to attend school full-time, I won’t have any children.[/li][/ul]
Jeg elsker dig, Thomas
–I refuse to leave the toilet seat down. Women in my house will learn to look before they sit down to piss.
–I don’t like children, and I hate that it’s becoming harder to find places where children aren’t welcome. (Las Vegas is only the most glaring example.) I don’t plan on ever having any of my own.
–On a similar note, in my world, in every high school, one day every twelve weeks would be Depo Day. Every high-school girl lines up against the wall, puts one hand on the wall and bares the other arm, waiting for the Depo-Provera train. It is only due to the unfortunate idiosyncracies of biology that have thus far prevented similar birth control methods for men that I would not require the same of the guys. Not having sex? Tough. Don’t want birth control? Tough. Catholic? Tough–if God wants you to be pregnant, he’s got a 0.3% failure rate to work with. (Actually, I’d probably make it every four weeks and the Lunelle train now, but you get the idea.)
–I like to gamble and drink, often at the same time.
–I don’t give a rat’s ass about high gas prices. Make it $5 a gallon for all I care, if the extra funds will help improve the environment.
–I think that there should be a progressively-structured, fairly obtrusive hourly tax on television use–$1/hr for the first ten hours in a week, $2/hr for the next ten, $3/hr for the next ten, etc. The money should go toward education and the arts.
–I have a not-so-secret desire to gather together all my black friends, drive up to a gated community, have them all duck down as I get past the guard by telling him that I’m Brittany and Caitlin’s piano teacher, and then drive past the houses…very…slowly…
Dr. J
I actually heard myself say the other day, “Thanks, that’s mighty white of you.”
It just kind of slipped out. The curse of spending years working among rednecks, I guess.
-I think motorcycle helmet laws are BOGUS. But, then again, I’m never on a motorcycle w/out my helmet. So, I guess I’m not only “not PC”, I’m also a hypocrite!
-I stare and laugh when I see people with several piercings on their lip/eyebrow/nose/cheek/all up 'round the ear/etc.
If I’m challenged by the person as to what I’m staring at?"; I eagerly remind them that if they put all that stuff on the outside, it’s gonna get looked at!
-I play DOOM, while my eight-month old son watches the screen.
-I proudly display the Confederate Battle Flag, even though, as a displaced Virginian, I now live in Ohio.
-I LOUDLY remind baseball-cap-wearing men to uncover during the National Anthem at ballgames. And, please don’t glare at me and not take it off… I’ll come and do it for you. Also, please don’t eat/smoke/talk/laugh during the National Anthem either, unless you want a mystery beer spilled on you during the fifth inning.
-If you’re a weightlifter wannabe, please ask us more experienced folk for help. We’re glad to. If I see you load up with too much weight, I’ll happily watch you injure yourself.