If you’ve ever been an engineer, worked with engineers, or even have some familiarity with processes involving engineers, watch this video.
Oh–and if you can, do it in the form of a kitten.
I laughed so hard I almost hurt myself.
That’s not funny. It’s an accurate abstraction of my job.
And it’s not Expert, it’s Subject Matter Expert, pronounced SME. Based on the Project Management Rule 47.r.1.245.j “Never use one word when you use three.”
The first few times I was called a SME, I had no friggin’ idea what it was.
The only thing missing was someone requesting a follow-up meeting two-days hence so that the SME can report status to the other four people.
And a schedule. You must have a schedule, even if you do not yet have any clue as to what you will be doing, when you will do it, or when it needs to be done.
Stranger
Painfully true, and I speak from experience. You might say that I’m an “expert.”
And we’ll need an OOM at the same time.
Been there, done that, successfully refrained from stabbing people.
That’s *Mister *SME to you!
Wow, that was not funny at all. That was much too close to real life to be funny.
Hey, you gotta laugh or you’ll cry, right? 
This engineer is just a little bit green. After a few years, he will find this perfectly normal. At this point, he will be ready to become project manager.
As a project manager, I was horrified by the “experts” bad attitude.
Right. He should just agree to everything as the design, schedule, budget, and team members will all change three or four times before the whole project is abandoned because the objectives of the client have changed.
“Can we also make the lines parallel and flash in fluorescent orange? That won’t impact delivery will it?”
Stranger
Terrible engineering, at first, but then he got it right in the end. The answer is always “Yes, we can do that”. A while later there may be some delays, but that happens with everything, no big deal. And by the way, transparent perpendicular red lines drawn in the form of an inflatable kitten in green ink cost more, someone should have mentioned that.
I know you don’t know what the problem is, or how you plan on solving it, or if it’s even possible, but can we have a date for a date?
It’s not the same without a public meeting where citizens accuse us of being in the pocket of the Red Line Industry and the applicant suggesting that we are deliberately trying to sabotage the economy/the country/Gods Plan by not giving them whatever they want because we’re all a bunch of Liberals.
AGILE has a phrase for that: Managing Customer Expectations.
But, you don’t dare do it until later in the project. At the beginning, you’re exactly right. It’s, “Yes, we can do that.”
Few people recognize Steve Jobs’ genious in that regard. He was ahead of his time.
I have to wonder if everyone sees themselves as the expert here. Just as nobody sees themselves as the pointy haired boss in Dilbert. I was sent this video by the living embodiment of the clueless project manager, the very guy I thought of when the PM opened his mouth - he seemed to think we had shared experiences as the expert. The clueless are clueless.
That phrase was around long before Agile. And people have been messing it up for much longer as well.
Yeah, that’s the difference between a rookie engineer and a mature engineer. Always always always say “yes”, because saying “no” - even if you’re being asked to do the impossible - is always the wrong answer.