…is a good dental plan and public showers.
Regarding Smeagol’s dietary habits, a few fast food joints wouldn’t hurt.
No offense but couldn’t you have dropped that in MPSIMS or one of the billion different Tolkien threads already going on here in the Cafe?
How about a shoe store? Poor Hobbits.
Whoever owns the shampoo and comb concessions could make a killing.
A good airline would be nice. It would cut down on all that trudging.
Odd comment – why don’t you think this thread belongs here, and deserves to be separate from the other LOTR threads? It’s about the book, it’s about the movie, it’s funny, it’s interesting…
and if it were shoehorned into another thread, wouldn’t that be (ah, dang it, can’t think of the word…) OH! hijacking?
Another Confused Primate
How about nuclear weapons? Let’s see the Ring survive a 40-megaton blast.
Or a couple good psychatrists. Gollum really should see someone about that split personality.
One thing I’ve been wondering.
What would happen if you sealed the Ring in a block of solid steel or something like that? While dropping it in molton steel might not hurt it, it would make it really hard for someone to put it on.
How about some safety regulations for working in those mines?
An MSDS* for all that Elven stuff would be nice,
A good gardener could fix the problem with those danged trees.
Current US military technology should could’ve come in handy. Up to the point when they have to fight against the supernatural. And I remember I read somewhere that they’re working on that.
Shucks, just give a couple of drunkard rednecks with shotguns and Trans-Ams and we coulda made the fires of Mordor and destroyed The One Ring with time to spare before Nascar Sunday.
*Materials Safety Data Sheet, reguired by OSHA on most job sites, in re: materials being used on job. (yes, I’m a contractor, too. Or was that Tractator?)
NoClueBoy wrote:
Indeed. I’ve been watching the cast commentary on my FOTR extended edition, and what with all the running about barefoot, Sean Astin said he stepped on a major piece of glass in the lake and needed 25 stitches. One of the other guys ran a massive sliver into his foot running across the dock at Bucklebury Ferry.
Saruman needs flood insurance, and Helm’s Deep homeowners.
They could use a Gap store in Rohan.
No-no-no.
A funny car, painted orange with a Confederate flag painted on the top, & the Good Old Boys (who are never meanin’ no harm, of course), & armed with bows, & arrows with dynamite taped on. If Sheriff Roscoe can’t catch them dang Dukes, why the Ringwraiths surely can’t.
Also, a Starbucks. All that cr#ppy Elven waybread/organic health-food junk.
There’s one in Mordor, but it’s got no parking.
<< What would happen if you sealed the Ring in a block of solid steel or something like that? While dropping it in molton steel might not hurt it, it would make it really hard for someone to put it on. >.
What, you think Sauron couldn’t zap a block of solid steel? Remember, he lived in the Fortresses of Dol Goldur and Baradur. You underestimate the power of the Forts.
Actually, I don’t picture the Elves as health-food nuts. I can imagine there being a really cool Elven coffee shop somewhere in Imladris (definitely not a Starbucks, though).
The block of steel is a good idea. The point would be to make the temptation to put it on while carting it around really, really small.
If you swallowed the One Ring, what would happen?
groan