One of the most awful movies I have seen in the last 5 years had got to be Meet Joe Black.
Dear lord, what a pile of dung that is.
I’m going to second Red Dawn. The group of people that I was with started talking about how cute the boys were and how good a movie it was. Then I said something like, “Um, that was a piece of crap.”
come to think of it, I didn’t stay friends with any of them… good riddance, their taste in movies sucked. 
Another notable is Killer Nerd. I know it’s a cult classic, but good grief. Nerd! Nerd! Nerd! if the f/x hadn’t been so horrible, it would have just sunk into obscurity.
Free Willy and the sequels
[Personally, I was hoping the whale would accidently land on the kid during the big jump scene at the end, or at least knock him off the barrier. Would have improved the movie for me.]
Coldfire, (no, I am not stalking you around the boards today), I agree - SUCH a piece of tripe. And, like Man in the Iron Mask, one of the screen gems I was subjected to on Northwest’s Amsterdam-D.C. route. In D.C., lots of people bought tickets to Meet Joe Black, watched the trailer for Star Wars Episode I, and then walked out of the movie.
Bless the Child. Not only was it not scary, I was laughing my ass off by the end…AND it was offensive because the “satanistic bad guys” all dressed like…well…me…so when I was leaving the theatre everyone looked at me like I was just got out of Hell. Plus Christina Ricca was only in it for like 10 minutes!!! What a rip off!!!
CB4 was such a horrible movie I couldn’t finish watching it after a friend rented it.
Spawn was as bad, I really wish I could have walked out of the theatre in the middle of it, but I didn’t want to leave my friends sitting there in agony.
I can’t decide which of the two was worse.
Alien (aka, the Three Stooges Meet the Monster). No, that’s unfair. The Stooges were Einstein compared to the crew of the Nostromo. A nasty film overall.
Starship Troopers Clueless film by a clueless director.
Dune
Guarding Tess
Last Star Wars film with Jar Jar Binks (seen with kids)
Godzilla (one set in NY)
God Bless the late, dear departed Jim Varney. No it doesn’t count, you would have to see them. Some of the the scenes such as the time Ernest wires a vacuum backwards and somehow defies gravity. His explanation of what happened to cause this (while floating in the air) was so funny you just had to laugh so hard it hurt.
Yeah the Ernest movies were stupid but they were often “Funny” stupid.
Though I’ve never seen them, I’d have to say all of the Scream movies.
the Blair Witch Project. Ugh ugh ugh. The motions made me want to vomit, and the girl’s voice gave me a migraine.
Number one, King daddy of movies that I abso-smurfly despise:
Rocky Horror Picture Show
Crap,tripe,garbage,filth,offal,carrion,dung…etc.
The movie that I can’t stand and foam at the mouth whenever I hear mention of is Dying Young. Julia Roberts and some actor whose name I’ve forgotten were the stars. I would rather be attacked by a pack of wild monkeys high on angel dust than lose another two hours of my life to that piece of crap movie.
God, I despised it.
Ladies and Gentleman, yet another vote for “William Shatner’s Ego Defecates On-Screen” (AKA,“Star Trek V”)
End Of Days- How do I explain how bad this movie was…It just defies logic…except for Lucifer trying to decieve Jericho to join him…except “The Devils Advocate” did a much better job.
The Ninth Gate- Again…crap…Well at least they got most of modern Satanism somewhat right.
Star Wars Episode 1- You kill the kick-ass villan…but you won’t kill Jar Jar Binks…Oh the unfairness of it all.
ANYTHING with Julia Roberts in it. No, she can NOT act. YES, she is ugly. Hideous, in fact. Why I see this and half of Hollywood doesn’t is beyond me.
As an example, I give you Pretty Woman.
Got to be Eyes Wide Shut. What was the <expletive deleted> point? They say you shouldn’t speak ill of the dead, but Satnley Kubrik deserved to die for making that piece of turgid <expletive deleted>.
Also votes for The Avengers and Rambo III
The last movie I actually walked out on was My Best Friend’s Wedding. Coldy, I share your antipathy for Julia Roberts. But this movie stunk even worse than most Roberts vehicles. Let’s start with Ms. Roberts’ character’s dilemma. If this guy was so terrific, and they’ve been friends forever, why didn’t she know she wanted to marry him until he’s already engaged? Answer: because she’s an immature, self-centered brat who, like a toddler, didn’t realize she wanted a toy until somebody else had it. But why she wanted to marry the guy was never clear to me, as I kept waiting to see his redeeming side and it never showed up. Meanwhile, his fiancee has had the word “DOORMAT” tatooed on her back and happily lies down to demonstrate. Irritating, irritating, irritating. By the time we left, I had no sympathy for any of the major characters (I wanted to personally bitch-slap at least half of them), and I was thinking the only way this turkey could have a happy ending was if the church suffered a gas explosion in the middle of the wedding, killing all inside.
And yet, somehow, when people start talking about their favorite movies, somebody always brings up this spectacularly bad movie. I do not understand people, I swear to pete.
I am also going to go for My Best Friend’s Wedding - a film with no redeeming features at all. A pigfest from start to finish, it gave me physical pain by the end of it.
Julia Roberts and Whoopi Goldberg are in joint position for my least favourite actresses. And has anyone else ever noticed that Julia Roberts has a flip-top head? I swear, if she opened her mouth properly she wouldn’t need a Reach toothbrush.
Acknowledging the very existence of Highlander II used to be a hanging offense in my little circle of friends. They’ve mellowed up some, but don’t expect to mention it and get away without bruises.
Sure, noone expected it to live up to #1 (which I liked a lot - it was silly, yet cool), but I hadn’t expected it to suck the way it did. Depressing.
Personally, I love bad movies (Battlefield Earth is opening soon here, and I can’t wait!), but even I have my limits.
Michael. The traliers looked promising as a black comedy (John Travolta as a chain-smoking angel with a 3-day beard), but quickly turned into a manipulative piece of feel-good filth. Andie McDowell (I knew I was in trouble when I saw her name in the credits) sings country songs about pie, and Michael gives up some of his life spirit to resurrect a dead puppy. Ick!
The Sunchaser. A celluloid enema from the director of Heaven’s Gate. This is the kind of movie that makes me ashamed to be a liberal.
–sublight.